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Sad and tired and can't sleep.

(6 Posts)
whatnow Mon 25-Aug-08 06:08:33

I woke again at 4.30- like i did for the last couple of mornings.

I can't get back to sleep sad

Stuff going round and round in my head....

I am bored and tired of my life right now.
My kids are 5 and 3 and great but challneging (esp dc1).
My DH is 10yrs older than me and permamnetly tired and grumpy.
I have had the kids pretty much all holiday on my own. I've a fair few friends locally, dc1's school friends so we've kept occupied but it has been a long long tiring month.

Main problems are
1) My weight...I've always been overwight, but am now a size 20-22 and only 5 fot 3. i am a mess sad
2) I've lost contact with all my old friends. THe ones from college and school. Whilst alot of my more recnt, baby type mates seem to spend weekends away or havong people over, we just plod through weekends and bank holidays, fighting for sleep and a little bit of time to relax.
Dh has pretty much lost contact with everyone- there is always a reason why he won't phone old friends, and they never seem to phone him either.

We both feel a bit on the outside alot anyway. i think that is why we are/were attracted- old and cynical. Be he seems to get more and more isolated and not be that bothered, excpet for the occ really miserable moment.

I tend to come on MN every day- esp evenings so I can avoid boring tv that he is watching. But I am also a bit addicted and get annoyed with myself that i am not doing more with my evenings.

We have one room downstirs so it is hard to use the ohone of an evening.

I have complicated family that exasperate me but I also like to keep in contact with them. Dh and his brother rarely speak.. ie years between calls.

I am just so bored of this, I want to go and visit people and take the kids and have fun with other people. But I haven't spoken to alot of my old mates for months and months.

Grrr, how did Dh and I get to this?
We used to have so much fun. NOw even why I try to be cheerful, he just mopes and back chats me and the kids like he's a kid too. he even stropped off and slammed the door when ds1 didn't do what he asked yesterday!

I need a plan.
I think the major part of it is to bar MN on my computer, so I free up tiime to talk to my old frineds.
I also need to get some excecise and try to lose weight again.

bloody hard thoough, when there is years of neglect of both friends and body sad

claudiaschiffer Mon 25-Aug-08 07:06:33

Poor you - it does sound as if you and dh have got into a bit of a depressing rut. I would suggest baby steps to changing your life.

Don't rely on dh to change - you need to make changes yourself and hopefully at some point he will catch on and want to join you.

I would suggest identifying an area that you really really want to change - ie your weight or friends. And really work on that. Make a list stop making excuses (sorry, I know that's very easy to say) and write down 5 things to do today that can help lift your spirits.

ie

1. Ring 3 old friends

2. Limit mn to an hour a day or between 8 and 10 pm or whatever works for you.

3. Chuck out all unhealthy food in your cupboards and stock up on fruit/veg.

4. Find out about local walking groups - or take the kids for a run in the park.

5. Make arrangements for something fun to do with a friend - go out dancing one night or to the cinema or a bar - something to change the routine.

Go on - I am very bossy wink I will be checking up grin.

Seriously, it is good to identify a goal ie to lose 2 stone or something and then make it a priority. Remember physical activity - a walk/swim/dance will give your spirits a great lift - nothing like a bit of fresh air and exercise to get those endorphines going - your kids and dh might like it too.

Good luck whatnow.

claudiaschiffer Mon 25-Aug-08 07:20:09

Oh, and remember that summer hols can be horrid and very long. It will soon end and your 5yr old will be at school soon.

I also get thoroughly bored at times, being at home with young children can be dull. However make arrangements with friends to meet up at the weekends - i'm sure lots of other families --can't stand the sight of each other-- enjoy a weekend with friends too.

whatnow Mon 25-Aug-08 20:30:09

i phoned an old old friend this eve.
We had a good old natter and we hahve arranged to meet up in a month or so smile

I am getting Dh to put a limiter on my time on the computer.
And next week i shall join the gym grin

Wish me luck!

claudiaschiffer Mon 25-Aug-08 22:32:37

Wow that's fantastic. Well done you should feel very proud of yourself. Can you follow up your phone call with your mate in a couple of days and arrange a firm date? (If it isn't already).

Keep it up whatnow you are doing really well x

claudiaschiffer Thu 28-Aug-08 12:46:03

Hello. Are you ok? Sleeping any better?

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