I am really struggling today

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

I just saw my 3 year and and I know what I have but I have had enough of being me.

I have no energy.

I can't be bothered to do anything. The kids made do with eggs, bacon and beans for tea. I have done nothing with them all day except for a trip to the park and I look at their little faces and know they deserve better. Such plans today. Bought a new game to play together after our fun playing ludo and snakes and ladders yesterday and it is still on the side.

I have been low since the row this morning with MIL and she has my son who I am wanting home.

I can't do this anymore.

I am lonely.

I am crap.

[meandmyjoe]

Sounds like a difficult situation for you. You are not crap and you aren't alone.

x

By the way, egg, bacon and beans, yum! I bet they weren't complaining! Don't feel bad, we all have days where we just do nothing with our kids and we all feel bad for it! You perhaps need to talk more about how you feel so you have more time for yourself and your kids.

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

If only I had someone to talk to.

I used to be such a fun person to be with.

[blackrock]

A trip to the park, eggs bacon and beans, a new game for another day. Please don't be so hard on yourself. Sounds like you are in a tough place, but you have done some lovely things for your children today.

[LackaDAISYcal]

I feel the same lovely.

DH works away, elder DC is a nightmare. I used to be full of beans and the life and soul and now i can barely muster the energy to get showered and dressed, let alone actually do anything active with the kids and i have to force myself to feed them at least something

Have you spoken to the doc and are you taking anything for this. Sounds very like depression to me.

Maybe we can hold virtual hands through this low fug?

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

Just on way to bed.

I am on Ad's and will be for a good while yet. Hoping this blip is just my period coming early with the upset of this morning.

I look at my daughter who is the image of me at that age and feel so sorry for the child I was and the child she is with a mother like me. They deserve so much better and I can't give them it on my own.

I was suicidal today. I want to live but I want all this crap to stop.

Got to take DS2 to the docs tmw to get a referrral and panicking the gp will agree he needs checking and then go for my other son and face my mil.

I must have a been a really crap person in a previous life.

I was NAB.

[LackaDAISYcal]

I knew that in the back of my mind NAB.

I think you need to see the doc about changing your dose or getting something else. suicidal thoughts are NOT GOOD. Are you getting counselling or anything or just taking pills? Maybe some talking therapy will help.

and don't think such negative thoughts about your DCs. they love you and you are the best mum in the world for them. We all get good days and bad days and introspection is a part of those bad days. you sound like a very good and concerend mum; otherwise you wouldn't be posting here about it

and hey, at least you managed it out of the house today; i'm still in my jammies and the furthest I've been is to the end of the drive and I've palmed my DS off on the rellies as I can't cope with him.

Have a good sleep and remember tomorrow is another day; I hope things seem brighter, but if they don't promise me you will go and talk to your GP

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

I have a GP appt for 2 weeks time. Probably be fine then

Just want tmw over with.

[LackaDAISYcal]

I don't know your story re DS2 but good luck for the appointment tomorrow and i hope things are OK with your MIL when you collect DS1

I hope you can get some sleep.

[ImnotMamaGbutsheLovesMe]

ave a form to send of for a podiatry referrel and the GP said he is knock kneed. I thought so before too.

[blackrock]

Hope it went ok today.

[LackaDAISYcal]

hope things went well today for you and that you're feeling a bit more positive about things today

meant to check earlier, but I've not been about much this evening.