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Feeling depressed. Feeling negative re relationship with DH. Cause or effect?

(5 Posts)
tigana Thu 17-Jul-08 10:22:35

So, when I get depressed ( self-diagnoses, thought it was PMS, but this bout is out of sync with cycle, so maybe not...) I tend to feel like my relationship with DH has gone to the wall.
When I'm not depressed, I don't seem to think this, I think it has some problems ( too much work, no time together, him being an arse grin) but don't ponder it's impending death.
When depressed, I wonder if actually the negative way is reality, and maybe I am just better at masking my feelings hwen I'm not depressed.

Does any of this make any sense to anyone or am I just rambling away? Sorry.

tigana Thu 17-Jul-08 10:47:45


nickytwotimes Thu 17-Jul-08 10:55:02

I understand what you are saying!

It sounds like your relationship is okay, maybe just clouded by your depression at times?

What about relationships with other family and friends?

tigana Thu 17-Jul-08 11:26:50

Feel less negative about friends and family than about marriage. BUT shoudl point out not a very close family and only have about 2 friends, and only see them once in a blue moon. So they are not really a factor IYKWIM.
My 'life' revolves around DH, DS and work, with a bit of dogs, cats and domestic duties thrown in.

superflybaby Thu 17-Jul-08 15:01:36

It does make sense. Yes indeed.

I think it is not 'masking feelings' when not depressed but more just accepting life and all it's difficulties, in relationships too.

When you are thinking clearly, or when 'not depressed' (I know where you are coming from I suffer in a similar way) you can be more objective and get a better perspective on things. Hold on to that feeling and talk to your DH during this time so he knows your true feelings and can support you through the rough times.

It is horrible having such conflicting emotions. Each phase feels so convincing at the time doesn't it. But it sounds like you recognise the depression for what it is. It is not your 'normal' state.

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