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I cant stand the mess and i'm going to snap!!!

(179 Posts)
zephyrcat Thu 18-Nov-04 16:47:59

Please tell me that mine isnt the only house that looks like a compete shit-hole?!?! I'm sick to death of all the crap everywhere. DD's toys and clothes that she just dumps everywhere. dp's clothes on the floor that he cant be bothered to pick up and wash. No matter how many times i tidy it the house looks awful and its really getting me down. I dread anybody knocking on the door because its too embarassing to open it! I know you cant expect to have a toddler and an immaculate house but surely not this bad??? I dont know anyone else with little ones so i havent had any other experience of it. I've just filled a black bag with a load of toys pens figures and chucked it out and thats only one room!! Do you think it would be cruel to throw it all away? (obviously not all of her stuff!!)

MarsLady Thu 18-Nov-04 16:48:39

Welcome to my world!

zephyrcat Thu 18-Nov-04 16:49:50

lol hello you! So its not just me then?? It's winding me up so much i'm getting angry with dd then feeling incredibly guilty!! What do you reckon - chuck it all away?

motherinferior Thu 18-Nov-04 16:51:46

My solution - for what it's worth, and god knows the mess gets me down too - is boxes. Bung DP's clothes - if you can be arsed - into a cheapo plastic box you can get in any grotty high street cheapo shop. Can't remember how old DD is, but Boxes help here to. If you feel up to it, label them (I write with permanent marker on that brown shiny tape stuff and stick the tape on) 'plastic toys' 'soft toys' 'stacking toys' and so on, so you've got a vague sense of things being in sets - all it means is you bung toys into the appropriate boxes.

Chucking stuff out is not a crime.

And your DP - like mine - should learn to pick stuff up. But I haven't cracked that one yet.

clairabelle Thu 18-Nov-04 16:52:07

if it makes you feel any better I am off sick at the moment recovering from an op and yesterday one of my lovely colleagues called in unawares and my house looked like it had been ransacked. The breakfast things were still all over the kitchen and she insisted on making a cup of tea for me amidst the bread crumbs and sat down on dd's Pjs, whilst dodging the chinese laundry, I was mortified

scaris Thu 18-Nov-04 16:52:18

And i thought it was just me!!!!:0 I've got so many toys (and peices of toys every where, i've had to put a load in the loft. My DS is 15 months and wouldnt miss them at the mo - so i'm just limiting the amount round the house (still a pigsty tho)lol

zephyrcat Thu 18-Nov-04 16:55:20

I'm so glad to hear its not just me!! boxes is a good idea actually. I can do boxes! at least then i can throw it all in and thats it gone! The biggest problem in our house is storage - there is none!!! No cupboards, no hidden under the stairs room no drawers - nothing!!! Hmmmm.... this weekend - boxes and lots of them!!!!

krisked Thu 18-Nov-04 16:56:24

My mother did exactly that when i was younger, filled the bin bag up and threw it out...we were all left scrabbling in the outside bin to retrieve our goods but I soon cleaned up my act

motherinferior Thu 18-Nov-04 16:56:58

Most of the cheapo ones stack too.

zephyrcat Thu 18-Nov-04 16:57:55

yeah my mum used to do it to me and i hated her for it!! Thats why i'm not keen to do it! One bag has just gone out while i was having a bit of a strop and only the fact that its puring with rain is stopping me going out there to get it back!!!

Thomcat Thu 18-Nov-04 17:08:54

I never cross from one side of the room to the other without picking something up and putting it away. It's sort of a habit now and that way it never gets toooo bad. i'm a massively tidy person and can't really chill out in the evening in a room full of debris that shouldn't be there so constantly tidy as i go.

scaltygirl Thu 18-Nov-04 17:13:30

Message withdrawn

MarsLady Thu 18-Nov-04 17:14:37

Hi Zephyr. My turn to be out tonight at bookgroup. Won't be around to have vodka with you until late. DH will probably spend the evening on ebay. Shall I send you some labels for your boxes? Have got a load of piccies on my computer that I cut out and stuck on boxes so that the kids (and DH) would know what went in what box. Have to say, DH still just chucks everything into anything. Grrrrrrrrr.... ah well.

Tortington Thu 18-Nov-04 17:15:22

i asked the next door neighbour to feed the dog whilst i was away and justified my shit hole with " please excuse the mess i am like a pig, happy in my own shit"

theres a diffeence between a mess everywhre and filth. every room in my house is a mess even though the living/diningroom & kitchen is done every day.

people can take me as i am or not bother - and i would rather not bother with those people who would rather not bother

zephyrcat Thu 18-Nov-04 17:17:32

ooh yes please MarsLady - that will help make sure i definately get them at the weekend I should think I'll be around late tonight as its my last night of freedom before dp comes home tomorrow! I've got a bottle of jd and a big bottle of coke

zephyrcat Thu 18-Nov-04 17:18:58

agreed there custardo - i keep the kitchen clean and hoover everyday, I couldnt bear not to - its just the sheer volume of crap lying over the floors in every single room!!

MarsLady Thu 18-Nov-04 17:19:28

I agree that there's a difference between mess and filth. I have a cleaner come in once a week to keep us clean (amazing how little I can do with twin babies - and that's a serious comment). However, the mess just builds. It starts as the kids get up and ends when they go to bed. I can cope with the mess as long as it is clean. I was once told by a woman that there was no point in clearing up the mess until the mess makers leave home. Amen to that!

MarsLady Thu 18-Nov-04 17:20:16

Zephyr email me your address, which I need for the other bits anyway.

zephyrcat Thu 18-Nov-04 17:27:56

ok trying to email you now but the pc is being a real pain in the a**e today so let me know if it doesnt show up

charliecat Thu 18-Nov-04 17:31:34

I live in a small 2 bed house and im still living in a shithole...thats even though I have chucked out over 15 black bags full of crap in the last 3 weeks. I can see the carpets now, which is unusual...but the shelfs are still cluttered. And by the time ive worked my way through all the shelfs the floor with be full up with 2 weeks crap and clutter again. I do the front room and the kitchen everynight also...SIGH.

MarsLady Thu 18-Nov-04 17:37:31

CAT your address. Nothing through on email yet.

kkgirl Thu 18-Nov-04 21:23:08

So pleased that it isn't just us then. We are a family of five horders, who have too much of everything, well nearly everything, junk i mean!!

We are having our house double glazed starting next week and I can't see how the men are going to get near the windows there is so much crap in front of them.

Lowryn Thu 18-Nov-04 21:26:22

We are a family of messy people. It brings us all down, but we do try. It was a sad moment the other morning when my almost 3yr old DD said "We live in a messy house mummy!"
True, sad but true

mummylove Thu 18-Nov-04 21:34:07


i laughed out loud when i read your first message.... this was me the other day, i had a go at my dh about how much all the crap in our flat gets me down.

i had a toddler dd and she can wreck a tidy room in 20 seconds. somedays especially near my period the mess really gets to me. not su much her toys but my flat can look like a right sh*t hole too. Its gets messy so quick and I know it doesnt take long to tidy up but thats not the point. sometimes i feel like i go on and on at dh about how little he does but it does work because he cleaned the bathroom today

i think motherinferiors idea of storage boxes is good for toys - i do it too.


mumwithnoname Thu 18-Nov-04 22:25:07

Spent the morning tidying up, But it wont last fed up of reading the riot act to kids and dh (who cleaned the mud off his shoes with the dish-cloth the other day and THEN put it back in the sink!!!!!)

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