Advanced search

Hospital discharge advice (TW)

(3 Posts)
PeanuttyButter Thu 19-Nov-20 11:22:42

Hi all
So my mum has been suffering with her MH since my man died 9 years ago, this was all compounded last year when her dog died also who was the one that was getting her through. She's been drinking heavily for asking as I remember but the last 12m and especially since the first lockdown it's just been getting out of control. I don't live with my parents but from what dad has said and the state of my mum most days confirms this. Don't get me wrong my dad isn't a saint either and likes a drink, but seems to stop before he's in the state that he can't look after himself.
Anyways, back to mum.
This last weekend she attempted suicide by overdose, this was not a cry for help as it was only luck that meant she was found. In addition to the pills she had drank over half a litre of whiskey in 3 hours.
The ambulance crew came and my brother spend nearly 2 hours trying to persuade her to go in the ambulance to hospital. She was refusing and kept repeating that she didn't care, she wanted to the pain to stop and that she wanted to die. The police were almost contacted to take her against her will. Due to CV19 nobody could accompany her into hospital once she was able to go. The following day she was physically ok to leave hospital. My brother picked her up and she told him that she was being referred to the MH team and was waiting to hear from them and her GP. Days later and we haven't heard anything so I tried to chase. Turns out she has refused any help and apprantly this is ok because she was deemed to have capacity.

Is this normal?!
I mean someone who does that doesnt have capacity to then say "oh I'm ok" as she is only ok as her plan didn't work!! What's stopping her from doing it all again?! Surely someone who does that is not ok?
Surely the fact she feels she doesn't need help is a massive red flag to say, actually she really does need help because she's in denial too?
Had I done something stupid like that and woke up the next day I'd be thinking Fu... What have I done?! I need help?!

Am I wrong?
What can we do to make sure she doesn't do this again? Services we've asked said there is nothing we can do if she doesn't want help.
I'm still having nightmares from recieving that call (and the call earlier that year when she fell from the top to the bottom of the stairs drunk cracking her head open) but she doesn't need help...

OP’s posts: |
Yellow32 Thu 19-Nov-20 13:32:14

You might want to research and look into the mental capacity act 2005.

If your mum has been deemed to have capacity, she is entitled to make her own decision even if may seem unwise to other people.

In order for your mum to be deemed to not have capacity, she would need to have 1) have a disturbance or disorder of the functioning of her mind and 2) be unable to make the decision in question because of this disturbance or disorder.

Someone is unable to make a decision if they are unable to do any of the following: understand the decision, retain the information, weigh up the information and communicate their decision.

Whenever someone makes a decision that someone has or does not have capacity, they must be able to explain their reasoning and provide an explanation. Maybe you can seek this from the professionals who made this decision. Ask for a copy of the mental capacity assessment and see if there is anything you disagree with. Make a complaint if you disagree.

Might also want to consider looking into LPAs

PeanuttyButter Thu 19-Nov-20 16:23:30

Thank you @Yellow32 for your reply.
The situation with mum is that I think there is something going on neurological in the background. Family history of late onset schizophrenia and some signs that have been showing for the last few years. Any comments about this and the possibility of visiting GP have been shut down and resulted in angry words. She has capacity therefore we can't get help from GP etc.. it's frustrating isn't it.
My brother is looking into LPA but this would only apply to situations where she doesn't have capacity... This would mean situations like the other which the police could have taken her anyways. Come the morning if she has capacity us having LPA will make zero difference

OP’s posts: |

Join the discussion

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet

Already have a Mumsnet account? Log in