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Mental health

I’ve stopped bothering to get dressed

117 replies

Litebritesnow · 15/11/2020 09:58

I can’t see the point, we can’t go anywhere or do anything and it’s going to be months before we can.
There’s no answer. Lockdown and prevent loads more people catch covid and even if they don’t die they might be left with ongoing health problems but ruin the economy and basically take any joy out of life.
Or let it burn through and more people die or are ill. If we don’t find a vaccine I think eventually the same amount of people will die anyway, just because over a much longer time frame.
There’s no good option.
I have given up. I am hanging on in there for my children but each day is harder than the one before. I don’t have the resilience I did in March. I understand lots of people are in the same situation and many in worse which is why I won’t see my gp.

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scrappydappydoooooo · 15/11/2020 10:12

If we don’t find a vaccine I think eventually the same amount of people will die anyway, just because over a much longer time frame.
There’s no good option.


Have you been asleep all week? The first vaccine that we'll be getting, Pfizer/Biontech, has released it's preliminary results. It's 90% effective and mass vaccination will most likely start in December. Two more, Oxford/AstraZeneca and Moderna are hot on it's heels and expected to announce, similar or better, results soon. With Oxford/AstraZeneca, expected in the next week or two and almost certainly being ready for mass vaccination in December too.

And that's the Euro/Anglocentric position. China has been successfully mass vaccinating for four and a half months with two vaccines that we can now see are very effective. (I'm not sure we'll ever have real safety data but their efficacy is becoming clear.)

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YeOldeTrout · 15/11/2020 10:13

Why don't you go out to get some exercise every day?

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Litebritesnow · 15/11/2020 10:18

What’s the point? Its boring. The children just moan the whole way and it requires a huge amount of enthusiasm which I just don’t have.

The vaccine probably won’t work. It’s going to take forever to roll out even if it does. And it probably won’t give lasting immunity.

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Hailtomyteeth · 15/11/2020 10:19

Wash and dress daily. Come on, you know it's right, even if you don't feel it. You might be slipping into depression. So, wash, dress, have breakfast and take those children out for a walk. They'll moan, you won't think it's worth the bother but after a few days you'll all feel the benefit. When you get back, have a cocoa ritual or something to make the homecoming special.

I worked in a school where there were facilities for children with terminal conditions. When someone died, the lead teacher would remind us to 'live more for the ones who have gone'. That's what we're doing now. Living to the extent of our ability, enjoying everything we can, for us and for those who have had to go.

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YeOldeTrout · 15/11/2020 10:22

What kind of example are you setting your children, do you want them to give up all hope of a good life too?

it sounds like depression, you can ask for help with depression.

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SuperAlly · 15/11/2020 10:22

I get it. I work from home full time. But you need to show your kids that you need to get up and dressed and keep going.

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Jroseforever · 15/11/2020 10:27

Op

For your children’s sake, FGS woman up.

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tortoiseshell1985 · 15/11/2020 10:30

I do get dressed but haven't worn anything nice for ages
I gave up months ago and even with vaccine news Government saying it's not enough so guess this is it forever

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BogRollBOGOF · 15/11/2020 10:32

This sounds like depression talking.

Yes, it's a chore to get out at the moment, especially with children involved, but movement and daylight are so important at this time of year, any year, but especially now.

How old are the children? Mine are Juniors age so enjoy collecting pokemon on Pokemon Go. Try and mix it up and give each outing a theme. Thank goodness the playgrounds are open.

Routine is important for your sense of self and that's worth pushing on to keep hold of.

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bumblingbovine49 · 15/11/2020 10:35

@Litebritesnow

What’s the point? Its boring. The children just moan the whole way and it requires a huge amount of enthusiasm which I just don’t have.

The vaccine probably won’t work. It’s going to take forever to roll out even if it does. And it probably won’t give lasting immunity.

Of course they will work. You are feeling depressed and that means your thinking processes are distorted. Please talk to your GP
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Orangeblossom7777 · 15/11/2020 10:36

I agree it does sound like depression- and it is two weeks till it ends. Hopefully.

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Delatron · 15/11/2020 10:37

Do you have a DP at home with you? Can you get outside for a walk every day? This has been the one thing that has been helping me. The weather was lovely last week. Tricker in the rain but I’m still going to get myself out in it for a run. I know I’ll feel better afterwards.

We did a Zoom call with friends last night. Not the same as going out but we got dressed up, put music on, lit candles. It all helped.

My kids moan when we drag them out. Let them moan! We did a bike ride in the rain yesterday. But then felt less guilty about the screen time for the rest of the day.

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ProfessorInkling · 15/11/2020 10:41

Can you get out without the children if they don’t enjoy it? I think many of us feel like this at times but if it’s become all-encompassing for you then maybe you are depressed. How are things generally?

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squashyhat · 15/11/2020 10:44

OP I know pills aren't the only answer, but if you can talk to a GP and ask for help, if they prescribe antidepressants I guarantee within 2 weeks you will start to feel better. If you live in England in 2 weeks time we may well nearly be near the end of this lockdown, and the vaccine trials will be that much further on.

Come on - chin up. You can make things better for yourself and your children.

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WindChimeTinkle · 15/11/2020 10:45

@Litebritesnow

What’s the point? Its boring. The children just moan the whole way and it requires a huge amount of enthusiasm which I just don’t have.

The vaccine probably won’t work. It’s going to take forever to roll out even if it does. And it probably won’t give lasting immunity.

So you know better than the world's top vaccine scientistsConfused. Oh ffs.
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Litebritesnow · 15/11/2020 10:50

Yes I have a husband. He’s still in bed. Par for the course. But he didn’t get up before noon at weekends even before lockdown.

We all know it’s not another two weeks. They’ve extended furlough until March. We know it’s at least until then. Maybe longer.

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DayKay · 15/11/2020 10:50

My kids moan when I drag them out too. They’d much rather spend the time in their gadgets and gaming but I know that’s not good for any of us.

Get up, tell your kids the plan is to go out for a bit, have a shower, get dressed and get out.

Try to eat lots of veg, some fruit and protein, get sleep, get out daily and see your gp.
Keep in touch with family and friends as well.

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Litebritesnow · 15/11/2020 10:51

They are backtracking on the vaccine. Particularly the time realistically that it can be rolled out.
I work in school so I’m hoping I just catch it and don’t make it. I’ve had enough.

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Litebritesnow · 15/11/2020 10:52

I’ve stopped eating basically. I’ve lost a stone and a half over lockdown and am underweight.

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Hayeahnobut · 15/11/2020 10:54

The vaccine isn't going to have a significant impact for quite some time. Supplies are limited and it will take time to get even the most vulnerable groups vaccinated. That is what the scientists are saying, none of them are suggesting it's a miracle solution in the short term.

Telling someone who is clearly depressed is downright ignorant.

OP, it's really tough at the moment and what you're feeling is just as valid as anyone else who is struggling. You count as much as the rest of us do. Think about setting yourself small tasks to get yourself going - wash your face - clean your teeth - put something clean on. They're all achievements if you're feeling like shit. For clothes, can you afford some nice comfy clothes, lots of threads about loungewear on the style and beauty board?

Look after yourself and know that small achievements count. You'll get through this.

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Delatron · 15/11/2020 10:55

You do sound depressed, Can you see a doctor? Even online consultation.

Of course we won’t stay locked down until March. There will be restrictions yes but we’ll be able to do stuff.

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Hayeahnobut · 15/11/2020 10:56
  • Sorry, that should read 'Telling someone who is clearly depressed to woman up is downright ignorant.'

    Just seen your update OP, please speak to your GP, your weight loss alone is worrying, and you do need - and deserve - some support.
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babysnowman · 15/11/2020 10:57

OP, please call your doctor. The thoughts you are having mean you need help. It's not true that just because you think other people might have it worse that you don't need help too.

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scrappydappydoooooo · 15/11/2020 11:03

even with vaccine news Government saying it's not enough so guess this is it forever

The government are not fucking saying it's not enough. They are saying this weeks news is not enough right now. We still have a tough few months to get through and can't let our guard down immediately. There is a very clear plan in the UK in terms of vaccination. Life will largely get back to very close to normal between Easter and the Summer. Mass gatherings and complete travel freedom may take longer. But day to day life will soon be as it was a year ago.

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SaskiaRembrandt · 15/11/2020 11:08

@Litebritesnow

They are backtracking on the vaccine. Particularly the time realistically that it can be rolled out.
I work in school so I’m hoping I just catch it and don’t make it. I’ve had enough.

No they aren't. And the NHS is working frantically to ensure they have a robust vaccination schedule. Plus news is expected of two other vaccines in the next couple of weeks. We're in a better place now than we have been for months.

Assuming this is genuine - you sound depressed and as a result you're catastrophising. Please speak to your GP, they can help.
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