Or is it always lurking ready to jump out and get you?
Thinking back to the big hole story... I have been looking at the sky and appreciating the scenery again for a while, but then one bout of illness and a bad couple of weeks with money and I feel like I am back in the hole.
I know it won't last for long, I can lift myself much more easily than I used to be able to, but will there ever come a time when I don't have to fall so fast??
I think it is very different for each person. If the depression came on you out of the blue and you were formerly 'not that kind of a person' I think that there is a very good chance indeed that you will recover completely. But for some people it is an ever-present possibility.
Whil it lasts, put all your feelings into quotation marks, and say 'this is what I feel now, but it will seem different soon.
I sound similar to you Flame - long term depression, severe AND but no postnatal. I found that ADs never helped, have had lots of psycotherapy that did help but some days/weeks I do still get very low.
It's like my get up & go goes on holiday, I end up hating myself - here we go again!
I think it will never get THAT bad again but it definitely lurks.
I was on ADs for a few months before I fell pregnant with DD, but I have never been sure how much of the effect was the ADs, and how much was someone telling me I had depression. I had been lethargic and tearful since about 15, very very low bouts over the years, and then at 21 I changed doctors and the first time I went in and sobbed on them they said it sounded like depression, gave me a prescription, and within about 12 weeks I was suddenly seeing the world in colours rather than greys, and came off the ADs.
I'm now 26, and I have never been down long enough to feel I need to go back on the pills, but I have found that my plummets are getting much lower, but shorter spells (if that makes sense??)
I would ask for a referral for an assessment to receive either psycotherapy or CBT (more probably) to help change the way you think/feel? An assessor would decide if they have anything to offer you and if so what.
I believe depression is the same as being an alcoholic or anorexic in terms of it will always be there. I believe you can learn to control it but it never truely goes away.
I think that's why is annoys me now that so many people claim to have depression but in alot of cases they just have the blues. I remember a few years ago this guy who was 23 has just been dumped by his girlfriend of 3 yrs. He went to the doctor and she said he had depression and gave him anti-depressants when all he had really was the 'blues' because he had just been dumped. He never took them in the end and suprise suprise he was fine in a few weeks because he didn't need tablets he just needed time to natrually get over her.
The word depression is too commonly used nowadays because it's a long term thing that goes on for years and years and if you have depression it's not hard to keep slipping back to that place you hate.
I thought I had depression; I definatley has PND. A couple of months ago I went to see my doctor about it. I couldn't cope anymore. I completed an HDN form (I think thats what it's called), given Prozac, went back a week later and told my levels of depression were 'normal' but I had very high anxiety levels. Things started to make sense along with the medication and I feel so much better. My father has suffered from depression all of his life, I think I assumed I sort of inherited it from him...thankfully not. I sincerely believe in what cherry has written - learning to deal with it rather than expecting it to go away. Good luck x