My MIL doesn't believe men have mental health issues

[northernmonkey1010]

I've been suffering from mental health issues (anxiety) it has recently got worse due to been bullied at work and I'm off sick. my doctor doesn't want me going back until I have been to counselling. I'm waiting to see the mental health team at my surgery. Sorry to drip feed.

My MIL lost her husband this year and since then she's had erratic behaviour and her doctor wants her to have counselling she is refusing to go. She has always been cold towards me and she's always right. But recently she's been making digs and sly remarks to me only when my wife wasn't there. Thursday I finally snapped and told her to get out of my house she refused and got in my face and said some hurtful things and said something on the lines fil never got the best of her me neither will I laughed in her face I know she was trying to goad me to hit her or lash out I didn't touch her which pissed her off even more. My dd was there whos a toddler crying I tried to get past her and she got in my face again and said it's her house (my house is rented from a private estate) and I was to leave again I laughed in her face so I grabbed the DD and left.

My wife got home from work and went down to see her and I bring my own anxiety on my self and the wife said exactly what I had been saying to her for the past 6 months that she doesn't believe men suffer from mental illness.

So can I ask for advice to get her some help I feel she needs to go and be assessed by a mental health nurse but we can't get her there she refuses to go.

Sorry for the long post

[tierraJ]

How old is MIL?

Grief can make people behave differently. People can get angry, feel extreme & irrational guilt & other emotions.

But basically the first step would be to get her to see a gp but unless she's a danger to herself or others or hasn't got full mental capacity you will have trouble getting a dr to see her without her permission.

[northernmonkey1010]

She's seen the GP and is on medication but refuses any more help and says she doesn't want to be here any more it's breaking my wife and 19-year-old DDS heart it's ripping the family apart. My wife has been unable to grieve as she's too busy looking after my MIL and now we have found my wife is pregnant and maybe further on than we think.

[northernmonkey1010]

My MIL is 60

[tierraJ]

60 is a difficult age because I think people really start to think about their own mortality.
If she's been with her husband for many years she must feel dreadful & lonely.

My mum was suffering from grief badly after her mum died so I bought her a book on grief written by a nurse.

Also I just listened every time she talked about it & reassured her that what she was feeling was normal.

If you think there's a real danger your MIL could harm herself though you must contact the dr again to tell them that.