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Please help me help DP.

(3 Posts)
worriedforhim Thu 21-Jun-07 20:11:45

I am a regular mumsnetter who has had a quick name change and many of you may recognise me but please dont say if you do to protect dp's identity. thanks.


I am worried about DP, he has told me he is feeling really low and finding it really hard to control his anger. He says he would never hurt his family but he's scared one day he will flip.

He is 21 and has alwways had an unusally laidback approach to life and nothing could ever ake him angry but now he has a bad temper tha the is finding it difficult to control.

He had a bad up bringng with violence and verbal abuse and is now not in contact with him mom and his dad who left and then turned up again when he was 13 we speak to about 2-3 time a month.

We have had one hell of a rough 12 months, he is about to loose his job, we have had close family illness to come to terms with and he has completley stopped contact wiht his mother and she has stoopped him cintacting his brother and sister. He is also going to the hospital tomorrow to undergo a biopsy on some moles, he has a long line of cancer sufferers in his family so he is worried about that.

He is also having physical symptoms which im not sure if they are related, he gets hot sweats/flushes and whenhe gets them he says he feels really ill and he shakes quite badly to like i say im not sure if they are tying in with the depression.

He keeps asking me for help and as a long suffering manic depressive i fell i could and should do something but m not sure what, i have always told him he can talk to me about anything and he does ocassionally and i have made him a gp's appointment for monday which i ill go with him for.

Our DS is well and truley in the terrible twos and he's finding his behaviour a real challenge i think he is worried he will snap and smack ds to hard or something.

Im not sure what to do for him except be there for him.

Im not sure if it even is depression, i think it is but i think its coming out in anger where things that would normally not bother anyone are really winding him up.

He feels really bad that he can't help feeling like this.

maltesemum Thu 21-Jun-07 20:17:45

Sounds as if you are having a tough time of it. I

I don't know if this will help, but maybe if he takes up some sort of excercise it will help him work off some of his stress.

Hopefully your GP can help, in the meantime, suggest he cuts down on caffeine and alcohol and drinks plenty of water.

The hot sweats/flushes may be signs of panic attacks so perhaps he could try breathing into a paper bag?

Good luck

Charlee Thu 21-Jun-07 20:27:54

I think thats all you can do really is support him through it. Im sure the GP will beable to tell you if it is depression and maybe refer him to a councelor type of person to talk through his childhood traumas to see if its the root of the problems?

The fact that he can and does speak to you is a good thing it would be far worse if he were bottling it up.

Hugs x

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