Paranoid delusions

[Bhj]

Hi. I’ve posted a few times about my psychosis. I’ve been on my fourth anti psychotic, amisulpride 400g for about a month now, no improvement in thoughts. Can anyone tell me an anti psychotic that worked for them where others have failed. Thanks.

[NightTerrier]

I'm getting on well with aripiprazole. It's one of the newer ones and has less side effects. It's really helped my schizophrenia.

Good luck with finding the right antipsychotic for you. You should have noticed some improvement after a month on amisulpride if it was going to work for you.

[Bhj]

Thanks nightterrior. I’ve already tried aripiprazole, it had no effect on me. Have also tried risperidone and lurasidone. The doctor says next thing to try is clozapine. I’m giving up hope. I really don’t believe I’m I’ll and what I’m experiencing is real but can’t get anyone else to believe me even police which I’ve called.

[NightTerrier]

That's a shame Bhj. It's working well for me. What have you already tried if you mind me asking?

There aer loads of first and secong generation antipsychotics, even some third generation like aripiprazole. I've read that geodon is meant to be a good one with fewer side effects.

Lets face it, the side effects can be a bit grim with these meds.

However, I have also read clozapine is meant to be effective when previous antipsychotics have failed.

So sorry to hear about your paranoia. It sounds very frightening if you have had to call the police. I don't think I'm ill when I'm really paranoid.

[Bhj]

It is really frightening and this last “episode of psychosis” as they call it has lasted since January last year. I don’t want to live like this anymore but have to keep going for the kids. Because mine are “non bizarre delusions” they’re harder to get rid of apparently. I started my second course of cbt today so will see how that goes over the weeks. Sorry to hear you’ve been paranoid before, it’s so tough.

[Yeahsureokay]

Have you tried olanzapine before op?

Sounds like clozapine could be better though.

[EbonyJade]

I find Aripiprazole 25 mg works for my paranoia (I've got schizo affective disorder).

But since the psychiatrist increased the dose I'm hungry all the time so counting my calories to keep my weight down.

Hope things improve for you soon

[EbonyJade]

But I didn't feel right until I got to 25mg - at 20 mg the strange thoughts were still there.

[Bhj]

Hi no I haven’t tried olanzapine. Have you had a good experience with this medication where others haven’t worked. My mental health team want to try me on clozapine next. It’s supposed to have 60% success rate but I don’t like the idea of having to go into hospital for 5 days when I start it and having to have weekly blood tests. They’ve increased my amisulpride this week from 400 to 600 mg to see if that makes a difference and if not they want to try clozapine but just wondered if there were other drugs I could suggest to them to try first such as olanzapine like you’ve suggested.

[Bhj]

Thanks ebonyjade. I don’t remember what the dose of aripiprazole I used to be on was but I know they said it was the highest dose they could give me. Sorry you’ve had to live like this too. The “paranoia” is starting to affect every part of my life now even in my child’s school playground which I previously felt was a safe space. How am I supposed to keep going?

[TheGhostOfBarryFairbrother]

I take clozapine and it's changed my life.

[Bhj]

Thanks for the reassurance. Glad it has changed your life. Did you have to go into hospital when you started it and if so for how long?

[TheGhostOfBarryFairbrother]

I'm not in the UK but yes, I went in for a few weeks. I was bouncing in and out anyway.

[TheGhostOfBarryFairbrother]

I had a blood test every week for eighteen weeks then now monthly.

[Bhj]

I spoke with my psychiatrist yesterday and they definitely want to start me on clozapine soon to try and avoid me having any other really bad days like I had at the school Wednesday. She said I’d need to have weekly blood tests to begin with but there’s the option of having it done in the community now instead of going into hospital. Not sure which option I’d prefer as too afraid to stay home alone all day for them to come out but may make my paranoia worse going into hospital.

[TheGhostOfBarryFairbrother]

How are you doing?

[Bhj]

At the moment I guess I’m what you could call a functioning alcoholic. I drink every day from 2pm to 3pm until it’s time to collect kids from school so I don’t feel afraid when it’s time to go home and act normal in front of them and act like everything’s ok. But everything’s not ok, I want it all to stop. I’m tired and I just want it all to stop.

[EbonyJade]

It could be the alcohol that is making the anti psychotics not work.

If I even have one drink my meds won't work so you do need to cut down?

I'm feeling crap today very bitter and angry.

[Bhj]

Yes I definitely do need to cut back on the alcohol but the drinkings quite a recent thing which I need to reign in before it takes hold. Sorry you’re feeling crap today, has something happened?

[TheGhostOfBarryFairbrother]

Well done on spotting the issue before it gets too engrained. Please tell a professional about it, they are not there to judge.

I'm going away to stay with my cousins. First trip away alone in three years. Bloody terrified.

[EbonyJade]

Had a crap day at work because I'm a health care assistant & a student nurse talked to me like I know nothing!!

I used to have a professional career but lost it due to the psychotic breakdown I had in 2012 and when she spoke to me like that it all came flooding back.

I spoke to a support worker at the cmht today & feel a bit better now.

[Bhj]

Thanks theghostofbarryfairbrother. I should tell my mental health team but I feel ashamed. Like I should be coping. I drink between 2-3pm so I’m never drunk but just enough to take the fear out of coming home with the children. I worry if I tell them child protection will get involved. I’m so scared of losing my kids but I have a fantastic supportive partner so shouldn’t. But he doesn’t even know I drink for that hour. I just don’t know what to do for the best. Well done for taking a break away. What is scaring you most? Are you close to your cousins? Hi ebonyjade. I’m sorry they made you feel worthless. I understand having a career and losing it due to psychosis. I’m an early years practitioner but you wouldn’t believe it now. Just can’t understand how I got to the age of 36 then it all went wrong. I’m glad you feel a bit better today. ❤️

[starlightafar]

Quetiapine works for me.
The alcohol will impede the medication fully functioning and will also give you more negative symptoms, and mask the positive ones.
I totally know how you feel. It's awful. Mine are non-bizarre too.
Clozapine is a wonder drug for many people. It doesn't have to be forever, but should give you a period of relief, when you can work on the delusions through therapy and work out where they are from x

[starlightafar]

Try to stay away from olanzapine it has been taken away as the first go to drug because it is associated with rapid weight gain and high risk or diabetes. Horrible.
Rispiridone? Do you take tablets or a depot?

[Bhj]

Thanks starlightafar. I never really considered the impact on alcohol on the effection of my meds but makes sense. I took rispirodone first time round but it made me very zombie like so don’t wanna try that again. I’m really hoping the clozapine makes a difference or I don’t know where to turn next. I’m currently having cbt so hope that will help too. Was supposed to have an appointment today but snowy weather and having to pick kids up early put a stop to it. I’ve put on so much weight since going on anti psychotics it’s unreal, was always slim before.

[EbonyJade]

Thanks bhj.

I'm back at work tomorrow, will try not to be so sensitive to what people say.

With weight gain I find that now I'm on 25mg of Aripiprazole I'm hungry every 2 hours which is difficult at work.
I'm calorie counting got to lose 1st 10lbs it's really hard!!