What to say to the doctor about my mental health? Never been before about it, and anxious.

[WS12]

I have decided after putting it off for about 8 months (more like 12 I recon) to go to the doctors about my mental health, I feel that there is something not well about me mentally.

I had a massive melt down last night and woke up this morning feeling so rubbish - my poor DH I don't know how he lives with me. I'm so sick of myself and so sick of this situation.

I think I am depressed. I used to say I was "home sick" after moving to Australia nearly a year and a half ago, but I realise now it's way, way more than that. I am in a state of constant low mood, most days I cry, feel frustrated, think about going home first thing on a morning and last thing at night, make plans in my head about what to do, talk to myself all day long, insomnia, heart palpitations 😱 This is on my worst days.... and then the next day I can wake up and love Australia and the life we have and get excited, make plans. I'm so up and down I don't know where I am Day to day. I hate myself right now. I'm not who I used to be at all...

I have been feeling rubbish for the past few days really missing what I call "our old life" where I had my family, a job I loved, and a future I could look forward to, really just a full life. Here I just feel so devoid of any of that, and with two small choldren - one who possibly has aspergers - I am really struggling. It all blew up when my SIL text me saying "guess what I've just seen", meaning the new fifty shades film, but after feeling crap and lonely, to get that text I absolutely blew up at my DH saying "it'd be great to have a sister to go to the cinema with " (my DH has 4 sisters and I know they will hve all gone together while lonely little me over here has um.... yes no one to go to the cinema with, I'll go on my own like everywhere else at the moment) and "it must be great to baby sitters", my SIL has two boys and no doubt my PIL looked after that while me over here... no we don't have anyone to look after the kids. She didn't send the text to annoy me we both love the trilogy so it was a genuine happy text, but it pissed me off to no end, which is SO unreasonable.

So my question is - what do I say to the doctor? This question has had me putting a visit off for a while because I just don't know what to say. I'm thinking something along the lines of I've been here x-amount of time and am really struggling. Low mood, feeling really burnt out as a mother, can't sleep well on a night, and have developed an obsession with going home, basically I'm really feeling unwell mentally and it's effecting my day to day life and marriage.

What do others think? Sorry for the rambling 😢 Never been to the doctors before for my mental health. I just miss the person I used to be. My DH says I haven't given Australia a good go though I have done everything he's asked except get a job (hard with two small kids and no family support but I think they'll have to go to daycare as I do think a job would help).

Any ideas about what to say to the doctor?

[WS12]

To add to this... Christmas was terrible, an absolute right off. I was good Christmas morning, but Christmas Eve, Christmas Day night, Boxing Day.... ergh, just struggled, teary, crying, just rubbish.

When I look back over the past year it's just a haze of trying to get through or "making the most of a sad situation". I'm so worried my low mood is losing me my precious time with my young children, I worry I'll loose all the time when they're little to feeling low like I won't remember or enjoy it.

[WS12]

Bump ?

[RustyPaperclips]

I won't lie, it will be hard, but you made the appointment which means you have overcome a massive hurdle.

I know it is easier said than done but tell the doctor what you have told us. Be honest. Best of luck

[Afternoon]

Tell the doctor what you've said above. You feel depressed, tearful, lonely, have constant feelings of wanting to leave Australia, and this has been going on for several months. If you think you may forget what you wanted to say, write it on a piece of paper and take it to the appointment. Once the doctor hears what you've said they can ask you some more questions about how you're feeling.