Emetophobic and panicking....talk me down

[Fudgecakes]

Hi. Long time lurker...first post. Been watching emetophobic threads with interest as I'm a long term sufferer.

Thought I was ok......as dd is older, and after having had issues with this herself but now copes a little better, my anxieties have lessened....or so I thought til yesterday.....took dog for walk and she walked by and sniffed at some vom . ...sent me into orbit with panic that she's brought something nasty into the house on her paws and muzzle. DH wiped her with anti bac wipes and hopefully the intervening 45 mins of walk between the vom and home might have helped. However upon googling I feel.doomed as if she did get by anything nasty (my fear is noro) as i lasts ages on surfaces and unless D H got it all off it'll be all over every carpet by now . I'm so scared I'm really agitated and snappy with everyone . Can anyone make me feel.better?

[RadioDorothy]

I'm just going out the door, but I am also phobic. Take heart from the likelihood that vomit in the street is far more likely to be alcohol related - or even travel sick related - than the result of noro.

If everyone in the house hand-washes diligently before eating, you won't ingest anything anyway and that 72 hrs will soon pass.

Back later, hang in there.

[Fudgecakes]

Thanks for your kind reassuring words. I have tried telling myself it's not necessarily a noro vom but that's what I keep coming back to.....classic catastrophising . I guess what will be will be....it's nothing I could have prevented as I didn't see her in time to stop her (DH had her on an extending lead) and we couldn't bleach her before allowing her in!! I hate being in the position where everything feels contaminated as that leads to the exhausting thought processes eg....unclean carpets = unclean soles of slippers DD grabs slippers to take them off then shover thumb in mouth as she's still a thumbsucker at 12! = rising panic in me. Or DDog jumps up at DH who dances with her while holding paws then picks up TV remote = rising panic in me.

DH also dosnt get my anxiety as he thinks it's odd and I need to get a grip so he isn't on the same page as me as far as hand washing and giving dog a wide birth for a bit...last night he was cuddling her on sofa and this morning forgot to shut our bedroom door so she was on our bed....I now have to strip the bed and clean down the sofas as this phobia dictates that I can't but catastrophise, so if I don't put 100% into trying to protect us I can't rest. Even though it's all over the floors and everywhere the dogs been since last night so it's futile. . Also it might not be anything and we'll all be ok.. ..it truly is exhausting being me

[woosey35]

Oh Hun, I totally could’ve written this myself. That all consuming panic state that you can feel rise like heat through your body to the level of feeling your head will blow off. The snappiness and loss of tolerance with everyone around you as they seem oblivious to the fact that all these germs are here and putting us at risk!! Some days are impossible!!
My dog has done the exact same thing. Awful!! But then I had to give myself a talking to before I gave the dog away!! I even think as I put shopping away....how many people have touched this tin etc, what germs have they got?
I can’t give you any help as to how to get through this, all I can give you is one massive empathetic hug. I’m there with you right now, walking by your side, feeling the exact same fears and desperate to be free from them. X

[Fudgecakes]

Aw...hi woosey. Thank you so much for posting....sorry I haven't responded sooner but i haven't checked in for a while.

I'm sorry you have this awful affliction too...I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy as it is so exhausting. For me i think the exposure to risk is almost worse than the fear of actually being ill as it triggers all the catastrophising and thought processes I've previously described and the obsessive need to clean alongside that awful feeling if doom and inevitability that illness will descend....then having to endure that excruciating 48 hours wait to see what unfolds and the sheer panic if anyone so much as farts!!

I've decided to seek help from the GP and get some CBT in place....I can't endure another noro season in this panic stricken state. My family don't understand and it's hard to hide my fears from them...I'm so embarrassed .

P's. ..as it happens we were all fine....its wasted life panicking like this.....I almost feel if I don't panic something will happen. ...I'm compelled to catastrophise. What a waste of precious living time

[woosey35]

Gosh it’s seriously like you’re writing my thoughts. Those 48 hrs of fear. The worry after eating something that maybe ‘not safe’. This is my worst fear. It’s bordering an eating disorder as I fear food being contaminated. I too would love to live free of fear. I’ve tried cbt but it didn’t work. It’s so scary. I hate the worry that eats away inside, the knots, the fear....none of which I want to share as I don’t want to sound a fruitbat!!

[Fudgecakes]

Oh bless you woosey ....I so feel for you. Yes....the panic of the possibly dodgy dinner....I once ate around an underdone bit of chicken ....I was trying to prove to DH I was cool about it but OMG I nearly died of fright when I processed the risks....once again, I was fine but the following 48 hrs was hell. That was back pre dd when i wasn't quite as bad as I am now.....God I wish I was chilled out about this