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Anxiety support, Hand hold or chit chat come say hi

(998 Posts)
Fairydust26 Sat 09-Dec-17 15:31:05

going through abit of a crappy time with anxiety/health anxiety at the mo so thought it would be a good idea to create this thread. I always find that when I’m feeling anxious writing it down makes me feel a little bit better so hopefully some of you might too and we can support each other through this crappy time as I know it can make you feel pretty lonely. I’m trying to not drag myself back to bed and write today off so I’ve made a cuppabrew put the heating on sat by the xmas tree and going to try and have a clam Saturday so come say hismileflowers

Magpie24 Sat 09-Dec-17 21:06:16

Hi there smile

I've had a bit of a rough day too, we're TTC our first baby and it's not going very well so far.

I'm also not enjoying work right now and thinking of a career change but not sure I can justify it in case I get pregnant...

How's your evening? I'm watching tv while DP is doing some painting.

bigfatmeanie Sun 10-Dec-17 10:04:08

Hi, mind if I join you?
I'm suffering with anxiety/OCD so badly at the moment that it would help to be able to get it out there without bombarding my poor husband with my over emotional rantings!
As you can probably see from my other thread, my ocd is around my teeth. Had some dental problems over the last couple of weeks and it caused a bit of an anxiety crisis after being ok for most of the year sad
DH's work xmas dinner last night, had a brilliant night and thought I was turning a corner only to wake up this morning in absolute terror.
Started taking sertraline this morning but now panicking over side effects blush
Seeing a counsellor tonorrow as well so praying I'll start feeling better soon x

Fairydust26 Sun 10-Dec-17 11:20:24

Hi magpie sorry to hear you had a bad day I know to well the struggle so I’m sending you lots of positive baby vibes for hopefully a baby magpie in the new yearsmile. Had a terrible nights sleep last night so feeling the effects of that todaysad

Hello bigfatmeanie please do come and offload on heresmile that’s exactly what I’m going through right now I don’t know what it is but I was doing so well then suddenly I feel like I’ve been hit by the anxiety train and it’s awful, had such an awful nights sleep my heart & head we’re racing all night feeling pretty sick as I haven’t eaten much these past few days I’m just hoping I’m over the peak of it now though.

I’ve been taking sertaline since the summer and it really does help ( you wouldn’t think so after what I just wrote) but I’m thinking it’s hopefully just a little blip or I need to potentially up my dose. Don’t be worried about the side effects too much I found them a little unpleasant for the first few weeks but it doesn’t differ much to what you get with anxiety anyway I found taking them before I went to sleep meant I slept through most of the side effects and try and take them with some food even if it’s just a biscuit or somthing as I found I got horrible heartburn. Really hope your appointment with the counsellor goes well tomorrowsmile

BeautifulLiar Sun 10-Dec-17 11:22:54

Hey, fellow anxiety sufferer here.

We're buying our first house and hoping to move in before Christmas so you can imagine the stress this has caused!

We were actually all good to go for Friday 15th and then last week the solicitor threw a spanner in the works. We still haven't even exchanged. Vendor's solicitor can't see a problem - our solicitor seems extremely cautious. Desperate to move on Friday, for many reasons.

Trying to stay calm...

Pinkcoat124 Sun 10-Dec-17 16:13:44

Hi I'll join you if I may. I've had a pretty rough year, all my own doing, due to the fact that I worry and stress over things incessantly. Its usually an imagined bad outcome to an event/ set of circumstances and I wind myself up into a state about things. Excuse me for being a bit vague but I don't want to give exact examples as they could be identifying.
I'm sick of myself and wish I could sort myself out and not be like this.

Fairydust26 Sun 10-Dec-17 19:37:47

Oh no beautifulliar sending you positive vibes, take a deep breath hopefully everything works out for you.

Welcome pinkcoat I know that feeling all to well if only there was a magic pill that would sort everything out id be the first person to take it!.

Pinkcoat124 Sun 10-Dec-17 19:51:20

Thanks fairydust. I am sat here in tears. Supposed to be going on holiday on Friday and I’m worrying the flight will be cancelled due to the snow. The thing is, I was worried about going in the first place and things have now flipped so that I am worrying about not going now! And I know people will be thinking that they wished that was all they had to be anxious about. This is just the latest in a long list of things.
I really think I need to go to the docs for some help. I can’t live my life like this ☹️

bigfatmeanie Sun 10-Dec-17 20:04:06

Thanks fairy ,I'm wondering now whether I should taking the meds at night?
I took one at 8.30 this morning and ended up back in bed from 10-2 😱
I did read somewhere that people seem to need to up their dose a bit after a while, my dr has started me on 50mg and wants me on 100mg after a few weeks. Hopefully a little increase might help you a bit.

Magpie my sister changed career while she was pregnant, that was 17 years ago and she's never looked back!

Good luck on the house buying beautiful, it is supposed to be one of the most stressful experiences. Hope you get it all drawn to a successful conclusion soon.

Pinkcoat, I do exactly the same. My brain seems to feel anxious then builds up a scenario to justify the anxious feelings, it's hellish at times.

I've spent most of the day sleeping or in the loo (sorry tmi), really upset tummy. We were at a work xmas dinner last night so not sure if it was the food or the sert this morning (I don't drink so know it's not that)

I'm going to try and take a tablet before I go to bed tomorrow night and see if that helps. Dh is back to work on nights come Wednesday so need to have my wits about me for our 3 dc

thefutureisours Sun 10-Dec-17 20:09:22

Anxiety and depression here. Not on meds but have doc tomorrow as really need them. Stressful full time job plus (undiagnosed but very probably) autistic toddler who hates sleep plus unsympathetic and grumpy dp not helping! Neither is the sodding horrid cold I have.

Pinkcoat124 Sun 10-Dec-17 20:18:41

That’s it exactly bigfatmeanie. My brain also needs a reason to be anxious, so I give it one. I magnify a thought until it becomes a massive concern and it is awful.
I am sure someone will advise you about the medication. My mum was on this and used to take it in the morning but I don’t know a lot about it.

Pinkcoat124 Sun 10-Dec-17 20:25:54

Good luck at docs the future. Lack of sleep won’t be helping the situation at all.
I wish I was brave enough to go to docs. I say (to myself) I will but never do. Been on antidepressants before and they didn’t really help me but they do for many many others. I’ve had telephone cbt as well and that was rubbish.

Tarragona Sun 10-Dec-17 20:39:52

I would like to join in please. Similar to a lot of what's been said and I've posted about this before. I'm bloody sick of myself too! Crap year as well worrying about one thing after another and the thing is every single thing I've tied myself in knots about has either turned out fine or not happened at all. Its such a waste of time and utterly pointless but I still do it !

Pinkcoat124 Sun 10-Dec-17 20:46:05

It’s hard to talk about this irl so something like this is such a help. Dh has lost patience with me as I’ve been like this for so long. I was crippled with health anxiety a few years back fairy. I still have it to some extent but the other anxiety has pushed it to the background.

Fairydust26 Sun 10-Dec-17 20:55:08

Tell me about it sometimes I wish there was an off switch so I could just have a minutes peace from the constant worrying. I think it’s wired into me to worry about somthing anything and I’ve never known any different and I hate it.

bigfatmeanie I’m on 50 mg now at first like you I took them in the morning but found myself so tired by the afternoon that I started at night instead. They gave me the most bizarre dreams literally every night till around the 3 month mark so that might be somthing to look forward too ha!.

Welcome thefutureisours & Tarragona😊

Fairydust26 Sun 10-Dec-17 21:01:15

pinkcoat it’s horrible isn’t it I’ve never really told anyone the true extent of my health anxiety even when I plucked up the courage to see the gp about my anxiety I just couldn’t do it. Doesn’t help that I have a massive fear of anything medical related or the thought of going into hospital sends me into a right state. Tbh that’s probs what fuels my HA it’s like a vicious cycle ahh😤

Tarragona Sun 10-Dec-17 21:06:31

Me too fairy. Its wired into me. I've always worried, even as a kid.
I don't talk to dh about all of this any more. He knows I worry but I bottle it up until I eventually explode and its happened so many times. All I want is reassurance, for him/someone to tell me not to worry and it will all be fine. But he won't do that. He won't do that to make me feel better. But that's a different story sad

Pinkcoat124 Sun 10-Dec-17 21:16:24

Yes fairy. HA is awful and no joke as some people like to think. I used to go to the docs about something and breeze in like I wasn’t really concerned, when inside I was in bits. I would eventually get reassurance (sometimes it would take months) and I’d be happy for a while, but then the next symptom would come along and off I’d go again.
My docs never knew I had HA.

sparklytrees Sun 10-Dec-17 21:18:47

Can I join too. I've had an awful year with anxiety and depression but I've had friends who've had worse and that just makes me feel inadequate.
I'm on 50mg sertraline for the last 2 years. GP refused to increase it as we're TTC.
I really want dc to have a sibling but age/weight/health is against us.
I even started smoking again as a coping mechanism, having stopped for a few years.

Pinkcoat124 Sun 10-Dec-17 21:30:20

Hi sparkly. I know what you mean, I’ve got a friend who has serious health and family problems and it makes me feel ashamed of myself as I haven’t really got anything to worry about.
Tarragona I had an argument with Dh about the same thing. He doesn’t worry about what might happen and can’t see why I do. He won’t tell me everything is going to be ok to make me feel better. He won’t lie and make promises that it will be ok. Even if it’s what I need. I don’t understand why he wouldn’t do anything to help the person he is supposed to love to feel better.

Tarragona Sun 10-Dec-17 22:10:47

Pink its not just my dh who is like this then. Its upsetting isn't it.
Anyway off to bed as I've an early start tomorrow.
Hope to talk to you all again soon.

Pinkcoat124 Mon 11-Dec-17 06:46:17

Well I've been awake since 3.30. Fretting over travel plans for Friday and worrying flight will be cancelled. Dh is not concerned and is saying so what? If flight is cancelled we won't be going. Its not the end of the world.
He's right, it isn't but that's my problem. I blow things totally out of proportion and its ridiculous. I need a reality check.
Sorry for moaning blush

Purplecarpet Mon 11-Dec-17 07:19:13

I will join in as well.
Sympathies Pink coat and everyone else suffering.
I do the exact same thing myself and blow things up out of proportion. I seem to be getting worse as I get older. I'm a medication avoider, partly due to fear of side effects, and also because I think I should be able to sort myself out. Which obviously I can't. Tried telephone CBT but could not engage with it. I don't think CBT is for me but I need some sort of counseling as I too cannot live my life like this any more.
Hand holding appreciated

bigfatmeanie Mon 11-Dec-17 09:48:04

Morning, ended up going to bed after dh did the school run, feeling absolutely bleurgh.
Cannot shake this exhaustion at all, haven't had a sert today. Debating whether to take it tonight at all.
Just wish I could kick this in my own because I know how bad meds end up making me feel.
I just worry that even if I do feel better I'll be like this in 6 months again! Going to keep seeing the counsellor, even when I start to feel better, maybe then I'll have enough strategies to help for the next round that'll inevitably come.
At the moment still struggling to eat or drink, stupid thing is apart from the odd niggle my teeth are fine. The failed root canal isn't really giving my any pain but I'm terrified of eating or drinking in case it hurts.
I really am mental!

Fairydust26 Mon 11-Dec-17 10:28:31

bigfatmeanie your not mental your just struggling at the moment and that’s absolutely fine. I’ve too jumped straight back to bed I’m to cold to move😬 however I really need to move as I’ve got things to do people to see and all that but 5 more minutes won’t hurt!. I’ve hardly eaten anything either and it’s making me feel shocking but I just have no appetite what so ever😤

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