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How do you get a Dr to listen.

(19 Posts)
Bluelonerose Tue 10-Oct-17 19:36:55


I've been depressed and anxious on and off since my 2nd child was born 13 years ago.
3 years ago I had a terrible experience which meant I had to go back on antidepressants.
Dr also put me in touch with a councillor who was amazing. Councillor also told me it was highly likely judging by what she knew that I was suffering from ptsd.
I've been back to the Dr several times but they just don't seem to understand. They just ask "any suicidal thoughts?" Give me a prescription and off I go.
One even reduced my dosage because "I need to come off them eventually" went back up on my next visit.

I also think that I may have some kind of personality disorder but haven't brought it up due to them being unhelpful. Somethings just not right. I've lost friends, my job, self esteem and although I feel low I'm not at rock bottom yet. I'm scared to go back there.

So how do you get a Dr to listen to you and understand that you no somethings not right?

PhoenixMama Fri 13-Oct-17 11:20:30

I'm so sorry you're feeling like this. Its so hard to advocate for yourself when you're wrapped up in this.

Was the therapist just limited sessions?

I would go back and ask to see a psychiatrist. Tell them that the counsellor told you she suspects PTSD and you're worried you also have a personality disorder. Those things are treated really differently to "just" depression and anxiety. You need to see a specialist. If you have private insurance don't wait for the NHS but I know not everyone has that luxury. Good luck.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Fri 13-Oct-17 18:14:05


I had a similar experience. My councellor and one of the CPNs from DHs team picked up my PTSD. My GP looked like she didn't believe me when I told her what they had both said and told me there was no point in refering me to anyone as the waiting list was so long. I wish I'd pushed it with her (I didn't feel up to it at the time) my employer sent me to a psychologist who wasn't a trauma specialist and made things much worse. I ended up seeing an NLP therapist privately for something called IEMT (similar to EMDR) which stopped all my symptoms in 2 sessions.

I would take a look at the NICE guidelines for PTSD and quote these to your GP. They are very specific about what you should be refered for. Also can you see a different GP? Some are better than others when it comes to MH.

authhapp Sat 14-Oct-17 20:04:09

I ended up seeing a private psych for a bit as no one was listening. I wasn't offered help until I had a psychotic breakdown and was presenting st A and E multiple times a week suicidal and with self harm. Eventually I was referred to appropriate services and diagnosed with EUPD. This was scary but it means I'm now receiving appropriate treatment. If things aren't okay, see if you can call a single point of access? A lot of trusts allow you to self refer which is what I've had to do in the past - and once you get to a meeting with actual mental health professionals they can't believe your GP didn't refer you!!

Justchillaxing Mon 16-Oct-17 01:52:03

This is interesting as i feel i don't "just" have depression but my gp just prescribes different ADs and nothing else. I feel alone and with no one to turn to and nothing improves. Not sure i can take much more.

NightTerrier Mon 16-Oct-17 13:51:28

I think a lot of it depends on your GP and their attitude towards mental health. Could you see another person at your surgery and ask for a referal to your CMHT? You could always try taking someone else along with you to stress how unwell you really are.

Also, you should be able to see a psychiatric nurse who visits your surgery. Could you request that? You may be more likely to get a referal to a psychiatrist and that means access to a proper diagnosis and better treatment.

I'd also tell the doctor that I suspect a personality disorder and that I'd like a proper assessment if I was in your shoes.

Good luck!

Aintgotnosoapbox Mon 16-Oct-17 17:05:45

GPs can offer their own help and guidance, medication if they feel it's justified, and signposting to services and referral to mental health team. It's the mental health team who can look more at the psychology side, psychotherapy, or a psychiatrist for specialist prescribing.
Ask for a referral to the mental health team, primary or secondary care.

hiyasminitsme Mon 16-Oct-17 17:13:09

Psychiatric nurses don't regularly visit surgeries

Justchillaxing Tue 17-Oct-17 00:28:15

The only mh care at my surgery is the Primary mh care team and she discharged me saying there was nothing she could do for me as I'm intelligent enough to know what i need to do shock I don't want to see her again and waste her time but I'm tired of trying different ADs, each of which makes me pile on more weight but doesn't help. Plus it takes up months and months - gp makes me wait a few months to give it chance to work. And I'm no better .. worse in fact. Now I just want to go to bed and talk to no one.

NightTerrier Tue 17-Oct-17 07:07:56

Psychiatric nurses don't regularly visit surgeries

Sorry, my mistake. It's just that we have this at my local surgery and I thought it must be the same across the country.

hiyasminitsme Tue 17-Oct-17 12:00:19

Sorry, my mistake. It's just that we have this at my local surgery and I thought it must be the same across the country.

that's very unusual, and I doubt patients have unfiltered access to him/her, it would probably be by referral.

NightTerrier Tue 17-Oct-17 12:20:14

hiyasminitsme, yes it does require a referal from a GP, but I think it's to ease referals to the CMHT and the CPN can refer to the CMHT or see you for a few weeks. I thought they had this everywhere.

hiyasminitsme Tue 17-Oct-17 13:43:16

nightterrier not in any of the practices I've ever worked in. we had a very keen lady from CAMHS who did this for about six weeks before declaring herself to be too stressed and we never saw her again!

Snehavaria2567 Thu 19-Oct-17 16:12:42

Dear Bluelonerose

When the GP only has 10mins per consultation, make the most of it by preparing beforehand. Write down your concerns, what you think the reasons are for feeling the way do (if you know), what you'd like to discuss at your appointment and what you'd like to achieve in terms of your health and treatment. Then rehearse and practice your pitch before you go in to see the GP. Limit yourself to one key thing you wish to focus on - not a bucket list.
When the GP asks how they can help, this is the time to deliver your pitch. If the GP offers a solution e.g. a change of medication but you want a referral, be direct and say you wish to be referred. If you're unsure about a change of medication ask them for information about the benefits and risks of the medicine to help you decide. Ask them what alternative options there are until you discover one that's right for you.
Many GP practices have pharmacists working in them who can help you with concerns about your medicines.
If you ever are feeling suicidal, let the GP or pharmacist know so they can help.
Good luck!

Bluelonerose Mon 23-Oct-17 19:36:52

Thank you all for your replies.
I haven't been back coz I find it hard to deal with it if I'm not in the mindset if that makes sense?
It's like I can only think and deal with this stuff when I'm low.

I'm going to phone Drs tomorrow and see if I can get an appointment with a certain Dr.
There is one I saw before who was lovely.
Fingers crossed she can help.
Thank you all

hiddley Mon 23-Oct-17 19:38:34

I just tell them the cold hard facts with no holds barred.

HopelesslydevotedtoGu Mon 23-Oct-17 19:55:15

Definitely go and explain what symptoms make you think you have ptsd and/ or a personality disorder to your GP. And say what you think would help. As advised above, being focused and succinct helps.

In my area though the cmht have a high threshold for accepting referrals. So it is fairly common for them to reject GP referrals if they don't think it is serious enough. And their definition of serious is pretty extreme. Just to explain why your GP May not have referred you.

If you have ptsd then yes that warrants specialist treatment. Just to add that I have seen people be told that they probably have ptsd by counsellors and actually they don't have symptoms that suggest ptsd. Obviously your counsellor might be spot on, but just bear that in mind.

Ermm Mon 23-Oct-17 20:01:39

If it is at all possible - go private. But it also is very hit and miss to find someone who can actually help you. Don't assume that psychiatrists know what they're talking about. Read as much as you can to see what resonates with you.

Try everything that might help you and see what it does - its highly unlikely there is "one solution" as such. I have found that the key thing has been to realise that no one can be as much of an expert in me, as me. Some professional help has been detrimental, some neutral, some positive. Totally have faith in yourself to be able to take steps t heal.

If you can find the counsellor who helped you before that would be excellent first step.

Good luck - its a long process to recover from something like this but it is possible!

Snehavaria2567 Mon 30-Oct-17 14:26:04

Don't give up. Persevere until you find an option that works or feels right for you. Reach out and don't be silent- nothing can change that way. Help may prove useless, ineffective and you never know -even positive. One step at a time.

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