I'm not for this life anymore.

[ChocolatePHD]

Have been sat here for two hours in a semi catatonic state. I dragged my nails down my legs and scratched my thigh with scissors. I feel so hopeless, pointless and useless. Dc deserve so much better than me.

I don't know why I'm posting. Just to get it out I suppose.

[ShirleyPhallus]

You're not alone OP

Have you got anyone you can talk to in real life? Please consider calling the samaritans

Can you start by putting on some soft pjs, put down the scissors, make a cup of tea and come back and chat to us?

[Josiah]

Please call the Samaritans

Whatever you're going through, call us free any time, from any phone on 116 123.

[user1485196412]

You're not alone. Is there anyone you can talk to?

[Caulkheadupnorf]

Ditto talking to the Samaritans and any other support you have (cpn etc).

I’ve been there and it gets better. I wouldn’t have believed it if someone one has said it to me, but it does.

[CamperVamp]

My Dc deserve better than me, too. But I am what they have: like you, a Mum and their one and only irreplaceable Mum.

You really are not pointless and useless.

What's making you feel hopeless, ChocolatePHD?

[LouMumsnet]

We’re so sorry to hear that you’re feeling like this, OP. We wanted to share Mind's information with you – it has practical tips on what you can do when you feel like this and where to get urgent help.

Samaritans are there for you too, 24/7, by emailing [email protected] or calling 116 123. You can also see the resources in our Mental Health webguide.

We're now going to move your thread to the Mental Health topic.

The support you're getting from other MNers is fantastic and we hope it helps. But we hope that you can also reach out and get some RL help to get you through this too.

[ChocolatePHD]

Thank you for your replies. I've been feeling really distressed over my relationship with my mum and I hate that making the decision over cutting ties is on me- the weight of it weighs a tonne. I don't know what to do and my brain melted this evening.

I had a bath and spoke to my husband for ages when he got home from work a little while ago. Feeling slightly calmer now.

Sorry for posting while all in a dirge. I'm bipolar and can easily fall into a misery ditch!

[ShirleyPhallus]

Glad you're feeling better and the moment has passed OP

Don't apologise at all, everyone has rough times and you're dealing with it really well esp considering you have bipolar.

[user1485196412]

Glad you're feeling a bit better. I hope you manage to come to a decision you're comfortable with about your mum, it sounds really difficult. I'm glad you have your husband to talk things over with. Take care x

[ChocolatePHD]

Thank you guys x

[frenchfancy17]

How are you this morning? Xx

[CamperVamp]

Well done, Chocolate.

Bipolar can't be easy, and I hope you can get some support and clarity as to how to cope with your Mum from your DH. He sounds understanding and supportive.

Always ask for help: someone will be around with a hand hold or a listening ear.

Take care.

[ChocolatePHD]

Thank you. I'm a bit calmer thank you. Still troubled but calmer. Brain a bit clearer. Going to do some yoga shortly which always helps relax me