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Feeling like a rubbish mum.?

(5 Posts)
SophieMayTay Mon 25-Sep-17 20:33:11

So I'm in a group chat on Facebook messenger with about 4 other now mummies I went to school with...
and I just don't feel like I fit in atall.

I feel like they've got it all figured out and I'm here hanging on to my sanity everyday.
I just feel useless.. and like everyone's doing a better job than me.

Does anyone else feel like this?
I feel like my smiles are a lie most days.
I love my son more than anything but still feel guilty as I have thoughts like " I can't be bothered to look after you today". Even though you do and always will.. those thoughts make me feel like I'm a bad mother.

ChocoholicsAnonymous Mon 25-Sep-17 20:40:21

You are not a bad mother. They most certainly won't have it all figured out. How old is your ds?

BumpGoesBumpety Mon 25-Sep-17 20:44:46

I'm going through this right now for the second time. The first time round like you I smiled and faked my way through it. Since then my parent friends have had their second kids, and my second is now a few months old. I've been more open with them this time round, and more honest about last time too - they all thought I had it together the first time round and admitted they felt the same way. Do what you to do make it through the days and nights, have those days where you go back to bed and leave the housework, order a takeaway. It gets easier with time, though it doesn't feel like it just now.

wowthisisnoteasy Mon 25-Sep-17 23:20:34

I'll bet your friends feel the same but are also too nervous to pipe up......check out the mum bloggers 'unmumsy mum' or 'hurrah for gin' are soooo not alone.

The best advice I got before I became a new mum was to listen to and then ignore everyone else and do it my way.
It took me a while to heed this, but it made a massive difference to my sanity when I did.
Cherry pick the best tips/advice you like and forget the rest.

user1480334601 Tue 26-Sep-17 21:41:23

I feel like my smiles are a lie most days

But you're still smiling for your son smile you're most definitely a great mum. It's actions that matter not thoughts. Please stop feeling guilty

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