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Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Mental health

What is this....

25 replies

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 21:40

Help me. I don't know what's wrong. I am under a serious amount of pressure and stress at work. Feel totally overwhelmed with everything that needs to be done, unable to prioritise and when I do have time, i find myself incapable of actually doing what needs to be done, like my brain has been stirred up and my head put back on. I keep bursting into tears for no particular reason and can't get a proper deep breath. Have to make a conscious effort to get a proper breath and it's like I'm sighing. Also struggling to get to sleep and stay asleep, often awake restless for hours :( what is this and what can I do ?!?!

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NolongerAnxiousCarer · 23/09/2017 21:50

It sound pretty typical of stress, you need to find a way to reduce your stress levels. Meditation, mindfulness and exercise help me. Can you talk to your manager about ways to reduce your stress levels at work? It might also be worth speaking to your occupational health department, they may be able to offer you some support. You could see your GP, they will likely suggest signing you off sick for a couple of weeks to allow you to recover and then look at finding ways to manage your stress levels.

NeonFlower · 23/09/2017 21:56

Take some time off work. The world will keep going round and you can focus on your health.

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 22:00

I'm the only person in my role at work, if I'm not there no one will pick up my work and it will build up to incomprehensible amounts upon my return. And while I'm not there I'm letting vulnerable children and parents down, I can't do it. Been fantasising getting run over, so know it's bad but don't know how to break this :((

OP posts:

Meow34 · 23/09/2017 22:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 22:03

I'm letting too many children and parents down if I'm not there, i can't do it

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PlateOfBiscuits · 23/09/2017 22:04

Letting them down how?

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 22:05

If I'm not there who will do my job?

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NotTheCoolMum · 23/09/2017 22:05

To be fair it's your employer's duty to ensure your workload is covered while you are absent. This applies whether an employee is on holiday or on sick leave. It's a job, ultimately the employer is responsible, not you personally.

Please get signed off. This is not sustainable.

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 22:07

New head teacher, no spare staff to cover my Role, everyone else already massively over stretched

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PlateOfBiscuits · 23/09/2017 22:10

You're a new head or you have a new head?

Get signed off - no child and no parent will die or even suffer greatly from your absence.

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 22:11

I'm the Senco, we've got a new head.

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Wolfiefan · 23/09/2017 22:13

You sound like me a few years ago. Get to your GP ASAP. Nobody will die an the world won't stop turning on its axis if you take time off. If you don't you will end up unable to do your job at all. Please prioritise your mental health.
If you're the Head what would you say if an employee told you they felt like this? You'd say it's not ok to just struggle on and to get help yes?

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 22:15

I don't want her to think me incapable, she doesn't know me or my history, or have any loyalty to me. She's only known me three weeks :((

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PlateOfBiscuits · 23/09/2017 22:16

Ah I understand Jaffa.

You know the answer. You need to take time off. No one will die if you do.

Wolfiefan · 23/09/2017 22:18

Mental illness isn't about not being good at your job. You wouldn't refuse a plaster cast because your boss might think you incapable. It's no less important to get this dealt with.
I struggled on until I broke. Please don't do that.

jaffacakefan · 23/09/2017 22:19

What are the signs I'm close to breaking?? I want to carry on as much as I can. Annual reviews, new entrants, setting up new term support, referrals, If I don't do this who will??

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Meow34 · 23/09/2017 22:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wolfiefan · 23/09/2017 22:23

In 20 years will it matter that those things haven't happened?
In 20 years will it matter if your mental health has been irrevocably damaged?
You feel overwhelmed? You can't sleep? You can't focus? You keep crying? You've fantasised about having an awful accident to avoid work?
All pretty clear signs you need help. ASAP. A short time off work could prevent a longer break being needed.
Call your GP. They may prescribe pills, a short break, CBT etc.

iamapixiebutnotaniceone · 23/09/2017 22:36

Is there nobody you can delegate to lighten your load?

EmeraldIsle100 · 23/09/2017 22:41

I am telling you now Jaffa there are two ways out of this. You keep on doing as you are doing and you will end up seriously ill with mental health problems (which don't mend easily) or you will take a heart attack.

I have just returned to work after 5 months off with the exact same symptoms as you and it was the best thing I did. I feel on top of things and not stressed out.

You are not responsible for continuity of service when you are on sick leave. It is not your responsibility - do you get that? It is not your responsibility.

I had that shortness of breath amongst all the other symptoms you describe. I ended up calling an ambulance and once they had ascertained that I wasn't having a heart attack they told me that my stress levels would lead to a heart attack and that they had seen it all before. My symptoms were the exact same as yours are now.

Phone in sick on Monday and see your GP without delay. This will sound harsh but the world will still go around without you but your loved ones will be left behind devastated and your employers will move on.

When I went back to work my employers had miraculously managed to find cover for my duties and now that I am back hell will freeze over before I work late again or get stressed about my work. I will simply say I don't have the time to do it.

Please put yourself first. If the worst happened they would have someone in your post and harsh as it sounds they wouldn't remember you for long. This happened in my office. A colleague died and we were all utterly shocked. A week later someone was doing his job.

Please put yourself first.

NolongerAnxiousCarer · 23/09/2017 22:44

What are the signs I'm close to breaking?

Read your first post to answer this. You are already there. No job is worth your health. As someone who works in a caring profession and also cares for my husband I have learnt that the best way we can help the people we care for is to care for our selves first because if we go under then we are no help to anyone else. Put yourself first for a week or 2 and you will be in a much better place to support your students.

EmeraldIsle100 · 23/09/2017 23:03

Agree entirely with Anxious put your own air bag on first!

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Poppyx7 · 23/09/2017 23:21

I felt exactly the same as you around the end of last year/beginning of this year. I finally snapped one day and had to go sick. I'd completely burnt out and I've been off on sick leave since February. Finally starting to feel like I'm ready to go back to work. Trust me, your work place will survive without you. You life, health and happiness is worth far more than any job. I learnt that the hard way.

Holz657 · 23/09/2017 23:26

I had those breathing issues. Ever since I can remember they pop up every so often. Stress and anxiety. I took the plunge a few years back and went to my GP and got tablets. Also got some online counselling. Good luck, it's a terrible thing x

jaffacakefan · 24/09/2017 10:47

Thank you all

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