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opposite of hoarding

(17 Posts)
raindropstea Wed 07-Jun-17 08:15:17

I didn't really know where to post this thread, but I figured this one might fit.

Does anyone else have this issue? I am like the opposite of a hoarder. I enjoy getting rid of stuff and decluttering. I can't live in a cluttered environment. It causes me anxiety and what I would consider cluttered, most other people probably would consider fine. My ex collected those stupid anime figures and had glass cabinets full of the things and comic stuff/figures everywhere. We never lived together but it would have been problematic. He had more of the stupid things in storage and would buy them even if he was low on funds.

My current partner brings stuff in the flat all the time. I fantasize about throwing a bunch of it in the boot and hauling it off to the charity shop. I'm okay with SOME (nice) decor items and want the place to look elegant and nice (but partner and I disagree on this frequently). I have a problem even when I purchase something new, it feels like I need to get rid of something I currently own. Sometimes I obsess over these thoughts. Living with my current partner makes me feel like I have no control at times as he tries to have the last word with everything, talks over me, etc. I'm only temporarily living with him and to be honest I don't see it lasting because talking over me, etc makes me feel so worn down.

Just wondering if anyone can relate to the opposite of hoarding issue. It literally feels so freeing getting rid of stuff. I like giving it to charity shops because I figure it's going to a good cause, but I end up with very few possessions.

Apricotjamsndwich Thu 08-Jun-17 07:29:11

I can relate to this. I'm not at your stage as I still have plenty of possessions but I do spend a lot time thinking about what I can get rid of and imagining getting rid of everything. Yet at the same time I feel comforted by having lots of clothes.

Chickydoo Thu 08-Jun-17 07:40:10

I am a bit like you Op
I find 'stuff' overwhelming
My teenagers have so much crap...I know it's in their rooms
(but I know it is in there)
If I buy somethingI must get rid of something.
My husband has the worlds supply of spare wires & spare crap. Drawers full of it.
I chucked out a full drawer of wires once (had no idea what they were) he didn't notice I had even done it.
I need space around me to work.
I love not having ornaments & bits & bobs on the side.
I fear this is getting worse. If it's not vital...out it goes..
I do have quite a lot of clothes, but I wear them all, and each item has its' own hanger.
If I get something new it will replace something I already have.

MrsJayy Thu 08-Jun-17 07:44:34

My mum is like this anything not bolted down or useful is chucked she can't cope with clutter and stuff it was exhausting growing up you didn't get attached to anything because she would chuck it away if it wasn't in a drawer or cupboard, she has terrible anxiety though i think it is hard being my mum.

MrsJayy Thu 08-Jun-17 07:47:11

Mum has ornaments but not many and they are displayed in even numbers was her 65th recently me and my sister bought her an ornament she had to remove 1 from her fireplace to put the 1 we bought up.

Iris65 Thu 08-Jun-17 07:48:56

I feel the same way. The less I own the better I feel. In my case its tied to an anxiety disorder that makes me feel responsible for everything and possessions just add to that burden.

Iris65 Thu 08-Jun-17 07:50:42

"If I buy somethingI must get rid of something.
My husband has the worlds supply of spare wires & spare crap. Drawers full of it.
I chucked out a full drawer of wires once (had no idea what they were) he didn't notice I had even done it.
I need space around me to work.
I love not having ornaments & bits & bobs on the side.
I fear this is getting worse. If it's not vital...out it goes..
I do have quite a lot of clothes, but I wear them all, and each item has its' own hanger.
If I get something new it will replace something I already have."

You are my decluttering twin!

laurzj82 Thu 08-Jun-17 07:59:56

I hate clutter too although oddly I am at the same time really messy..? I am forever taking things to the charity shop that we've not used for a while and then finding 2 weeks later I need them.

I think it comes from having a tiny box bedroom when I was a kid for me.

Blodplod Thu 08-Jun-17 08:06:24

I can relate to this.. I'm constantly clearing out, throwing out clothes (charity shops) getting rid of stuff we don't use etc. My friend came to stay with me recently who hadn't been to my house in years and commented our style very minimalist. Not in a bad way but I too can't stand things not being put away or clutter. It makes me anxious if stuff is just left lying around and not put back. We also try and stick to a one in, one out policy where possible!

EmpressOfTheSpartacusOceans Thu 08-Jun-17 08:13:00

I did that over & over again for a long time while I was living with my ex, took piles of stuff - always my stuff - to the charity shop / tip.

When we finally broke up, I stripped my stuff down enough that I could fit it in a taxi.

Now I'm back to buying & enjoying things, I think because I'm happy and settled.

raindropstea Thu 08-Jun-17 10:46:48

Chickydoo, it must be difficult with teenagers with hoards of stuff in their room. Just knowing it's in there would drive me crazy. I don't have children yet, but one day I hope to. It's a fine line, it seems. On one hand you want them to have the things they enjoy, but you don't want them to clutter up their rooms. The issues with all of your husband's wires and things would drive me mad. Most men don't think in terms of wanting to declutter... I feel kind of like I'm in a perpetual state of nesting. I also need space around me to work. Clutter feels "loud" iykwim. It's so distracting that you can't think clearly.

Ever been into a really cluttered shop? It's so overwhelming and sensory overload.

MrsJayy, I feel for your mum but I also don't want to be that way when I have a child one day. I wouldn't want to take away something they love. I think children who grow up like that run a risk of becoming hoarders because they never had anything or got to keep it for long.

Iris, I think I have an anxiety disorder as well and I totally relate to feeling responsible for everything you own.

picklemepopcorn Thu 08-Jun-17 14:39:55

I'm going through this. I'm de cluttering, stripping back, making everything work for its keep.

I'm about to strip the garden and ditch some house plants. Life is too demanding to spend energy on looking after stuff.

Crossoldwasp Thu 08-Jun-17 18:04:46

Me!!!

I sometimes ponder that if DH died, I'd at least have the booby prize of getting to totally clear out the garage and shed (his two overflowing crap holes).

It sets my teeth on edge just thinking about them.

Sycamorewindmills Thu 08-Jun-17 18:21:23

My eldest is like this. Her flat is perfect. Each drawer perfect. Capsule wardrobe on matching hangers. She wasn't like it when she lived at home..

SomethingOnce Mon 12-Jun-17 21:01:18

Clutter feels "loud" iykwim

OMG, I was just saying this the other day.

Tastesjustlikecherrycola85 Mon 12-Jun-17 21:05:12

Yep, same here! Also suffer from anxiety, I find my brain feels muddled with so much stuff around me

PhyllisNights Mon 12-Jun-17 21:07:48

I'm a minimalist. Big fan of chucking stuff away. I go down to the tip a few times a month. No need to hold onto useless clutter.

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