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Realised I have anxiety - what now?

(27 Posts)
Sorelip Sun 23-Apr-17 16:15:36

I've had my second panic attack today in the last two days. I seem to get them now whenever DH works night shifts at the weekend. He's staying home tonight as he finally got to see the state I get into, and doesn't want to leave me alone with DCs. I'm going to make an appointment with my GP tomorrow. What is likely to happen once I tell the GP?

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 16:18:05

Hi sorelip. In my experience they will look at reasons and then suggest CBT and possibly meds. Are you feeling depressed/low too? Not necessarily the case but mine go hand in hand with low mood.

Sorelip Sun 23-Apr-17 16:24:41

Hi Joto, thank you for replying. I've been depressed in the past (PND) and it doesn't feel like that. It's more I start telling myself I should be taking the kids out to the park or something, that I need to do this and this and this, and then start telling myself I'm a terrible mother for not wanting to take them out, for shouting when they start playing up (they mostly play up because I'm staring into space worrying about being a crap mother!) and start worrying about various things. It's like my brain is on a hamster wheel and won't shut up. Then I start to tense up, chest tightens and crying starts. Loud noises make it worse.

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 16:34:30

That describes my anxiety to a T though my children have now left home. I did have PND though but mine was more anxious based and I did feel like a crap mum. I bet though you are a fabulous mum but you may be stressed. I've gone through a period of high stress and I hate loud noises which make me jump! My mind fixated on crap I think and then I wind myself up. However you (and I!) Need to not be so harsh on ourselves as that causes stress. So what if they don't go to the park everyday - It's not the end of the world! What do you do for you??

Sorelip Sun 23-Apr-17 16:45:47

I work full time, which I consider me-time. I run, and occasionally go to the gym. I'm also studying for a professional qualification, but that's actually stressing me out more at the moment. I dick about on my phone a lot, and read if I get the chance. I was drinking in the evenings to calm myself down - in fact, when I'm drinking is the only time I ever feel OK, but the next day I always feel worse, so I've cut right back on that. I'm having issues with DH related to his working hours, so I actually don't have time to do much for myself. After seeing me this way today though, that might change.

Sorelip Sun 23-Apr-17 16:46:42

Wow, how very me-me-me that post was! Joto, how long have you struggled with anxiety? Do you have it under control now?

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 16:56:56

That's ok! You sound like a very driven woman which us great just make sure you take time for yourself regularly. I'm assuming im older than you (48) abd gabe just had a really stressful period at work and home and my anxiety came back as I wasn't taking care of me enough. (Add bloody hormones and it's been shit!) For a number of years though I had it at bay hopefully DH will talk with you to look st changes??? Drinking IMHO is not a good thing for anxiety - doesn't mix well for me at least x

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 16:57:23

Flipping typos sorry 😁😁😁

Annahibiscuits Sun 23-Apr-17 17:01:50

I realised I had anxiety (which sounds like yours) about 7 weeks ago. My GP has referred me for CBT, but there is a very long wait time for this. I also got prescribed sertraline at 50mg a day. Side effects for first few days were horrid then I got a total relief of symptoms for a week or so. Unfortunately anxiety has returned with a vengeance and I have increased to 100mg with no effect.

I've been told that different meds work for different people at different doses and its a case of trial and error. GP also has said that beta blockers can be taken as well to lessen the physical effects of anxiety.

What I have found though, although I still have anxiety I still feel 'better'. It doesn't really make any sense but I think possibly I did have some depression as well. Like you I have have PND and didn't think I had depression now. But I think possibly, the anxiety can mask other stuff?

Good luck. It's so awful

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 17:09:59

Hi Anna. Ive been prescribed sertraline but im hesitant in taking them. What were your side effects?.i know not everyone gets them

Sorelip Sun 23-Apr-17 17:30:20

Thank you Anna, it's good to hear other's experiences. I was taking citalopram for four years and was really pleased that I managed to get off it. I don't relish the idea of having to take ADs again, but if that's what it takes then so be it. I'd do pretty much anything to not feel like this.

Joto, it's interesting to hear you say you think I'm driven. I think I'm a slacker, and feel like I've wasted my potential. I've realised that my job is going nowhere, I'm earning less now than when I was 20, and we're back in debt again. I can never keep the place clean or tidy enough, the kids are never happy with what I feed them. I'm not good enough for them.

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 17:40:51

That is the bollocks that is anxiety speaking!!!! I left school with nothing to live with the local idiot. Very clever but did nothing. Had first child at 19 second at 25. Divorced and a string of pants relationships. I ended up getting my degree late in life brought up two kids and it was a struggle but they are happy. Did I feel like you - Yes! I spent too much time beating myself up about my failings but it doesn't help. Im now leaving a well paid job with a 45 min each way crap urban commute for one 15 mins away along a gorgeous rural route. My health and piece of mind is more important. Take a step back. Do you have high expectations of yourself? I did and it didn't help my anxiety one bit. I bet you are going ok but you need to believe that xxx

Annahibiscuits Sun 23-Apr-17 18:15:40

joto the side effects for me were really bad anxiety, waking in the night really tense and terrified. I felt like I had taken amphetamines. It killed my appetite and I had a headache. But, it all subsided after 5 days or so. The following couple of weeks were blissful. I really thought I'd cracked it. You forget what normal feels like don't you, and its great! Shame it was short lived

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 18:19:36

I'm sure they will tweak them for you so you can feel like that all the time soon. I think they can take a while. That's how I feel anyway especially the night time thing hence why I'm hesitant - I couldn't cope with anymore crap nights!

Annahibiscuits Sun 23-Apr-17 18:42:11

Hmm, yes I can see that. It's impossible to know whether it would make that even worse isn't it. Or you might just not notice that as a side effect as its so bad anyway?

Manupprincess Sun 23-Apr-17 19:01:03

I'm in a similar position with severe depression and anxiety. My GP has been amazing and sent me for CBT. She also directed me to a few resources to help while I was waiting, some have helped but not all. the link takes you to some workbooks which have helped me understand the illness a bit more.
Headspace app for mindfullness/meditation
Well done on taking the decision to get help, it takes bravery to do that.

Nutmeg4321 Sun 23-Apr-17 19:55:18

Hello all. Sorelip Lots of help and support here already but thought I would add that I am in the process of recovering from frightening anxiety and panic attacks. I am certainly much better than I was but a long way to go still. My gp recommended Citalopram, counselling, gentle exercise, I do yoga, to allocate at least 10 minutes a day to me time. Things like that. Little steps but fingers crossed it is working. Hope your gp can help you too.

Joto369 Sun 23-Apr-17 20:16:38

Wonderful advice Nutmeg. Especially little steps 😊

Sorelip Sun 23-Apr-17 20:54:04

Thank you Manupprincess I'm going to have a look at that link. I find it hard to read of lots text on my phone so I'll do it when I can get on the computer. I'm taking a bath for some me-time while DH puts the kids to bed.

Nutmeg thank you, those are things I can do. I'm so all-or-nothing, and it so often ends up being the nothing option. Little steps are what I need I think.

Rinkydinkypink Sun 23-Apr-17 21:00:35

Look on YouTube for how to manage them. Consider adding meditation and relaxation into your days. Look at tapping for anxiety. It looks very silly indeed buy it truly works! Look at 7-11 breathing. Give yourself space and rest. Panic is a very natural reaction to prelonged stress.

Stay away from caffeine and alcohol. Remind yourself constantly that you are ok and that it will pass.

I have anxiety and panic and have learned how to manage it! Still go to your gp but start doing these things tonight!

You can turn this around just as you can if you pulled a muscle or broke your leg. That's all that's happening it's just you can't see the damage you can only feel it.

TyneTeas Sun 23-Apr-17 21:04:00

this free app from Bristol University for anxiety is quite helpful

Manupprincess Mon 24-Apr-17 15:51:04

Thanks TyneTeas I've downloaded the app and will give it a go later.

Aquamarine1029 Tue 25-Apr-17 13:02:49

Please get this book...
Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks by Barry McDonagh. It is amazing. Panic attacks are nothing more than excess stress chemicals in your body that wreak havoc and make you miserable. You can't run from them and most meds do not work, never mind the loads of side effects. This book changed my life. Get it from Amazon.

Joto369 Tue 25-Apr-17 13:10:38

I've got this and yes so far it's good. My problem is I'm so exhausted and spaced out its difficult to face my fears!!! Logically I know everything it says is right but it's so hard xxx

User2468 Tue 25-Apr-17 18:43:03

Joto, it's interesting to hear you say you think I'm driven. I think I'm a slacker, and feel like I've wasted my potential. I've realised that my job is going nowhere, I'm earning less now than when I was 20, and we're back in debt again. I can never keep the place clean or tidy enough, the kids are never happy with what I feed them. I'm not good enough for them.

Are you me?!?!

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