Not quite sure what's wrong with me, traumatic events

[Zaharatall]

Whee to start. Hoping someone can understand where I'm coming from.

I've never felt quite right since childhood, I've always felt different, I've always been really sensitive and has periods of feeling so low I wanted to die.

I had a partly troubled childhood and in some ways my life has been a series of traumatic events.

I went to see my gp about 6 months ago because I was struggling with a situation. I did like a scoring sheet but I didn't score highly for depression, I was moderate for anxiety and I know I get anxious, but I'm not having panic attacks or anything like that.

The go didn't medicate but referred me for CBT. Our area only offers 4 sessions and to be honest it's barely helped me at all. There was nowhere near enough time to get into the nitty gritty of the things that have happened to me.

I don't even know what's wrong with me, I don't feel very depressed, I enjoy life, I sleep well, though I do have nightmares. I manage. I'm not massively unhappy. I just don't know how to process the things that have happened to me, I don't always trust my own judgment, I take things really to heart a lot of the time and struggle with friendships.

I'm not sure what I should do next.

[AnneofGreenGablesAgain]

I'm really sorry you've been feeling so low.

Can you afford private counselling?

[NolongerAnxiousCarer]

I would be tempted to go back to your GP and say, OK I've tried this, it hasn't worked what next?

Seeing as you are refering to traumatic events maybe have a read of the PTSD thread ans see if anything there resonates with you. When I had
PTSD brfore I was diagnosed the GP did one of those score sheets. I scored low for depression and high for anxiety. You can also find specific questionnaires for PTSD online.