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(134 Posts)
hayleyB79 Sun 05-Mar-17 09:24:45

Hi I'm new to mumsnet and am posting my for the first time. I am currently experiencing my second episode of psychosis, even tho I don't believe I'm I'll at the moment but that's the thing u wouldn't if your I'll. Just wondering if anyone else has had experience of this and if its something I can expect to live with for thee rest of my life or whether it is possible to experience it a couple of times then never again?

mainlywingingit Sun 05-Mar-17 09:34:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mainlywingingit Sun 05-Mar-17 09:35:01

Mans work on humans was meant to say "it works for him"


hayleyB79 Sun 05-Mar-17 10:24:44

Thanks. That's reassuring to know. I had my first episode 3 years ago in my mid thirties after having my second child and I was put on risperodone up till October last year when mental health team weaned me off it slowly but paranoia has returned and they've now put me on aripiprazole as risperodone not good long term but they've said I'll be on it for a lot longer this time.

mainlywingingit Sun 05-Mar-17 11:19:27

Yes my brother was a serious case - it was very severe bi polar and the episodes were frightening. He is on medication for life but it's not an option for him to come off it.

If anyone met him they wouldn't know a thing. But be anal
With your medication taking it at the correct times and never missing it.

He also has ensures he looks after himself and doesn't drink too
Much and exercises regularly to keep his moods stable. (He has some low moods sometimes). Otherwise he is now very happy.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 05-Mar-17 11:36:38

My DH suffers with episodes of psychosis, he has had 2 recognised episodes, but I susspect many more before MH services picked him up 3 years ago. I have a CPN from his team allocated to support me and have asked these types of questions. His answer was that everyones different, I think statistically 1 in 4 people will completely recover with no need for medication long term. Others live in an almost perpetual state of psychosis despite medication, and then theres everything in between.

Like you DH managed well on medication (olanzapine) but when they stopped them he relapsed. He managed on a low dose for a long time, but in currently back on a high dose following his relapse, hoping to wean down soon to reduce the side effects. The CPN did say that he has known people have more than one episode and eventually end up off medication with no furthur episodes. Looking after yourself and managing your stress levels, getting enough sleep are really important too as mainly said.

My personal view having known DH 10 years with most of it unmedicated and bouncing from crisis to crisis is that DH is happirest and only able to lead a normal life (hold down jobs and maintain friendships) when on a small dose of antipsychotic.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 05-Mar-17 11:40:47

And flowers to you, it really is a scary and confusing illness. I hope you have good MH support. DH is under an early intervention in psychosis team who are an amazing support to both of us and have done a lot of work on spotting triggers and staying well.

hayleyB79 Sun 05-Mar-17 11:51:41

Yes I am under the early intervention team. Sleep deprivation was what they thought to be the trigger for my first episode as my baby woke every hour of the night for a year and a half no matter what I tried so I never really slept all that time. This time round they think its due to the stress I'm feeling around my daughter who started at secondary school in September and just isn't settling well. I think I really need to focus on doing things just for me as everything I do revolves around my 2 kids. Thinking of starting zuumba once I'm well again. My psychosis makes me have persecutory delusions so hard to get out on my own whilst I'm I'll.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 05-Mar-17 12:17:12

Stress and sleep deprivation are triggers for DH too. Do your team run any groups? DH used to go to bowling, football and golf every week with his team and to the cinema occasionally. It really helped him to build his confidence again. I know its really hard when you have these scary thoughts though. Definately doing something that gives you some time for you is important, even if its having a bath, reading a magazine etc. Do you have any child free time?

hayleyB79 Sun 05-Mar-17 12:52:38

During my last episode they put me on a course called bluebells where I met with women in similar situations and each week we focused on different things like one week we would do exercise then another week cooking etc to teach us self help techniques. I get 4 hours a day 3 times a week while my sons at nursery. I had so many plans for the new year on doing keep fit classes during that time to lose weight as I've put on a few stone since I got I'll last time and was always slim before. I just have to keep telling myself I got better before and I can again, that's if I am I'll this time.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 05-Mar-17 13:54:28

If the MH team are telling you you are ill, you probably are, it takes DH months before he can look back and see he has been poorly. Thats one of the things that makes it such a difficult illness to self manage.

I would start off doing little things for yourself whilst your son is at nursery, set asside an hour or 2 just for you to do something you enjoy. Exercise is good for body and mind so when you ferl up to it that sounds like a good plan. Antipsychotics are notorious for weight gain, so exercise does sound a good plan. And yes you are right, you got better before and you will this time too.

hayleyB79 Sun 05-Mar-17 14:34:30

Everyone around me is telling me I'm I'll so I guess I've got to trust them and use the CBT techniques they taught me before. The mh team want me to see a psychologist this time. I think last time they thought it would be a one off as I did. At the moment I'm too afraid to be at home alone until my daughters home from school then I just pretend everythings OK but its exhausting trying to find somewhere to go and someone to be with every day. I'd love to just drop kids off then come home and relax. Only time I truly relax is weekends when my partners off work. Thanks for your words of support.

Whattodo222 Sun 05-Mar-17 23:22:29

I'm on a taper down of olanzapine after my first period of psychosis about a year ago, here's hoping for no relapse but only time will tell,stress was definitely a factor for me so I'm being careful to avoid it as much as I can

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Mon 06-Mar-17 08:28:33

I know a chap who is a total pshcho. He is on very heavy meds all the time that make it impossible for him to work. One fine day about thirty years ago, he decided he didn't need his meds because he felt OK. Within 24 hours he had his wife against the kitchen wall with a knife at her throat. Somehow she talked him down.

After that she said to him, "if you ever try to go without your meds again, I will simply walk out the house and you will never see me again". He understood the gravity of his condition and they are still together.

It is a very difficult condition to live with. But it can be managed.

hayleyB79 Mon 06-Mar-17 15:25:01

Fingers crossed for you whattodo that you don't relapse. Its hard not to feel stressed when you have the worry gene isn't it. That's a scary situation itsnoteasybeingdifferent. Thankfully my psychosis doesn't make me aggressive, just terrified but looks like I'll be on the meds long term now.

iveburntthetoast Mon 06-Mar-17 21:28:35

itsnoteasy, are you being serious? In what world do you think it's OK to describe someone as 'total psycho'?

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Tue 07-Mar-17 05:06:07

My apologies for a poor choice of language.I am not sure how to describe someone who becomes so detached from reality that they can hold a knife to their DF's throat.

It is a nuisance we can't edit posts.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Tue 07-Mar-17 17:31:10

different I also find your turn of phrase offensive, would you be happy if someone referred to you as a maniac because you suffer from periods of mania? Psycho is definately a word that needs to be confined to history in the same way as words such as retard, spastic and cripple. I would also associate it more with psychopathy which is completely different to psychosis. I think better phrasing would be severely unwell with psychosis, or even psychotic would be more correct, although thats another word that gets misused in a negative way. We used to have neighbours who called DH psycho, which was very unpleasant.

Most people with psychosis arn't violent or dangerous, generally its a terrifying experience like a waking nightmare, from what I understand.

hayleyB79 Tue 07-Mar-17 19:27:24

Thanks I'veburntthetoast and no longer anxious carer. I don't have a violent bone in my body. I think some people get confused between psychopathy and psychosis, two very different things.

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Tue 07-Mar-17 21:45:43

No Longer,
Please lets not get into an argument. I have already offered one apology.

But in answer to your question. These days I would accept it if someone called me a maniac when I am being manic and not be offended. However, in truth, I used to think I was normal and it really was everyone around me who was a wrong-un. In the past I didn't understand myself and I did use to get uptight when people questioned my behaviour. Now I recognise I need to use meds to moderate my moods and behaviour. That was point behind the original story. Meds can work very well. Especially so if the person who is ill recognises they need medication.

So going back to Hayley, I don't think it is possible to say just yet that you won't ever have a relapse, or that you will always have to use meds. Time will tell.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Wed 08-Mar-17 09:05:29

different appology accepted, I'm not going to fall out with you over it, just an area where I'm sensitive. I'm very protective of DH.

hayleyB79 Sun 12-Mar-17 12:22:57

Am I right to feel upset? I'm currently having persecutory delusions(so I'm told) and I'm terrified of being left alone particularly after dark. My partner said he had an awards evening for work that he couldn't get out of as everyone was expected to go last night. They had to meet at quarter to 7 and it was supposed to end at midnight. He knew I was anxious about being left alone and unfortunately no one else was able to come and be with me so I just thought OK I'll be terrified but just have to get through it. I text him an hour into it asking if he was having fun and he said he'd stayed for half hour to show his face then had enough and was now in a bar drinking with someone he used to work with. I sat up until he came home as too terrified to go to bed which was at nearly 3 in the morning. Am I wrong to think that if he'd had enough after half an hour he should of come back home to me knowing I was terrified. I understand he needs to still have a life but while I'm I'll shouldn't he be more supportive bearing in mind it was only 2 weeks ago he went out with his friends in another town overnight and I had to get my friend to stay over that night.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 12-Mar-17 12:55:30

Hi hayley,

I know that it was a horrible experience for you to be by yourself, but if hes generally supportive I do think you need to cut him some slack here. Supporting someone through mental illness can be really tough too. I think that when DH is unwell with psychosis it affects me as much as it does him. Its really important for your DH to get some time out for himself too, so that he can stay mentally healthy himself to be able to support you. DHs early intervention team have emphisised that however poorly DH is I must make time for myself. I remember DH ringing me in a state asking me to come home, when I was in a meeting with one of the CPNs from his team (because I was going under myself). The CPN said reassure him but tell him no, you need some time out for yourself, go to the gym as you were planning to after our meeting. Its a ballancing act, offering support to my DH and looking after myself. I've ended up really poorly myself after DHs last episode of psychosis last summer and am still recovering now. It's been a real shock to DH, who has then had to care for me and found it really challenging. I think 2 nights to himself this month (assuming its another 2 weeks till he wants to go out again) isn't a lot to ask for. Maybe just see if he can give you more notice to arrange for someone to stay with you.

hayleyB79 Sun 12-Mar-17 13:31:25

Thanks nolongeranxious. Your message has helped me understand he's not going out because he doesn't give a shit but because its what he needs. It just seems like when I'm well he rarely goes out but when I'm I'll and really need him to be around he seems to go out more but I can see now its becasusre its what he needs to do.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 12-Mar-17 14:01:41


DH seems to have an inbuilt sense where when I'm exhausted at my wits end and really need some time out he seems to need my support the most. Not sure if its because he senses I feel this way and it triggers something in him or if its just when I feel this way I dont cope with supporting him as well. Until being ill recently I didn't let him know how much I was struggling as I was worried about outting pressure in him when he was unwell. The early intervention team have stepped in and really helped us both through this rough patch and helped me realise how important it is to let DH know when I am struggling, and helped him understand why I need my me time.

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