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How do you actually cope with working & having a family when you feel so awful?

(6 Posts)
Honey1975 Sun 05-Mar-17 09:02:24

I've felt really low the past couple of weeks. I've been so tired I've been picking dc's up from school and lying on the sofa with tv on barely able to keep my eyes open. I've even had to force myself to make their tea🙁

I've hardly done any work at work for about 2 weeks. I hide behind my pc and just drift into my own thoughts. I just have no interest in my work and cannot concentrate.

I take fluoxetine and have done for a while. When I first took I noticed a huge improvement but now I still feel really low. I was thinking maybe I need to change to something else but I'm afraid to.

My relationship with dh is not great as I am always moody & miserable. I love him but feel so distant from him.

How do other people actually manage to do all the day to day things that have to be done when you have children and run a home and go to work? I just can't be bothered to do anything!

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 05-Mar-17 12:06:57

Honrey, I think the answer is that we don't always. If you are sinking again a review with your GP sounds like a good idea. Have you been offered any councelling, cbt etc alongside the ADs?

When both DH and I have been low recently we have both been off work sick, we have no kids abd yet the effort of keeping the housework up has been too much. We are both climbing out of the pit and back at work part time/reduced hours and yet the house has not recovered. I often get home from work and have to force myself to make tea, just getting through the basics can be such hard work. So long as your kids are loved, clean and fed thats the main thing, other stuff is a bonus.

Joto369 Sun 05-Mar-17 12:09:19

Hi there x sorry your not feeling great. I can't relate to how you feel but only because when I was depressed in the past it was agitated depression do I was the opposite. I also found doing things distracted me from how anxious I felt xxx hopefully someone will come along who can relate xx

fallenempires Sun 05-Mar-17 13:48:03

How long have you been taking Fluoxetine for and what dosage?It doesn't sound if it is having the required effect although in the early weeks it can make you feel utterly wiped out.
I'm guessing that the dcs are primary school age?Are they aware that you're not feeling well?All you can really do for now is manage the basics,and tackle the other things when you feel more up to it.I know that this isn't what you wish to hear but you do have to remind yourself that you have an illness albeit one which isn't visible.If your arm was broken then you would be limited to how much you could physically do wouldn't you?
What support are you getting from your DH?

fallenempires Sun 05-Mar-17 13:51:13

Oh and meant to add that no AD's that I have tried have given me back my motivation.My get up and go has returned once the illness has been effectively tackled.

TerrorTwilight Sun 05-Mar-17 14:17:46

Hey OP. The short answer in my case is I don't. I'm just in my own world and have been for months. Went back to work, stayed a week, got signed off again with a new SSRI and now beta blockers too.

Finally disclosing my MH difficulties was very scary but also I feel like it's opening the door to being able to heal, because I'm no longer hiding who I am and what I've been living with.

I feel you on the relationship front, btw. My DW is enormously supportive but it's very hard on her. She snapped at me a bit today for making a mess, and I don't blame her - my brain is just absent right now and the responsibility for family life is falling disproportionately on her. It must be very stressful. And our relationship is already very strained anyway.

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