Last week I had my first session with a psychotherapist, who I liked and found professional. I contacted her because I realised I wanted to find someone and some time and space to talk through things that have happened in my life over the last 15 years (basically my adult life - I'm mid-thirties) including family bereavements, a period of a highly stressful job, a couple of unhealthy relationships, and now a marriage where we both struggle to communicate, and having unexpectedly become a parent (DD now two). I also grew up in an unusual family dynamic which I think has impacted negatively on my relationships and my self-esteem. I feel like I've lost a sense of who I am, and also I think my marriage would benefit from counseling but I wanted to work on myself first and work out what I want.
In the first session I set out all of the above, cried a lot and felt tired but lighter afterwards. It felt like a good first step. But now I am very apprehensive. Mostly because I don't know where to start. There seems to be so much to cover and I've no idea how to marshal my thoughts. I am worried I am just going to end up rambling every week and not getting to the bottom of anything. I'm prepared to be in this for the long-term if it helps me feel positive about the future, as well as improve my self-esteem and my relationships with my parents and husband, but is there anything I can do to make the process easier in some way?
Or is this an extremely naive question? Should I just do a few more sessions and see how they go, before getting too hung up on the process? I will discuss my worries with the therapist but I know that ultimately she will talk about what I want to talk about - I just can't work out specifically what that is from the multitude of experiences I've had.
I should also say I had counseling in the past following the death of my brother. I liked that therapist too, and thought she was great as she helped me see that my anger was a lot to do with also 'losing' my parents to their grief. But I've never known what to do with that knowledge and in practice it has made me feel resentful over the years. So I'm also worried I will get to that point and never resolve anything in myself.
Long sorry! Any insights appreciated.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.
Mental health
How to get the most out of therapy
5 replies
cheersbye · 27/02/2017 13:40
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.