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Eek. Fuck. Damn. I'm scared.

(27 Posts)
NewPuppyMum Sun 26-Feb-17 18:29:07

Starting EMDR tomorrow. Should I read loads or go in with just what I've gleaned from the few appointments I've had where we've worked out what we need to work on and what we're going to do ?

this is happening three hours before therapy with a doctor for my dickhead husbands pointless affair. Yay

and two weeks before a brain ct as doc thinks I might have a tumour followed by camera up my bum as other doctor thinks I've something wrong there too. Yay

PastysPrincess Sun 26-Feb-17 18:38:30

It was fantastic for me. I felt like the session seemed to drag on for ages but what I thought was 10 minutes was actually 40. Dont put too much pressure on yourself and just go with it.

It really was life changing for me.

NewPuppyMum Sun 26-Feb-17 18:40:13

What will I feel like after? Will I still be able to drive home, walk doggy , feed kids etc ?

NewPuppyMum Sun 26-Feb-17 18:40:28

How many did you have?

PastysPrincess Sun 26-Feb-17 18:51:00

I had about 4 or 5 sessions but I'd definitely say the results just from one session were amazing. I felt quite dozey and tired. I was told to take iteasy for the rest of the day but I was able to drive home no problem. I think it's different for everyone though.

NewPuppyMum Sun 26-Feb-17 18:53:17

I'm booked in for 15.

Fuck

PastysPrincess Sun 26-Feb-17 18:58:28

Theres no right or wrong with it though. It depends on your own individual circumstances and what trauma you have faced. I suffered PTSD following a traumatic birth; in addition to having PND. Mine was a very specific one time event. You sound like you have a lot going on in your life. I was booked in for more sessions but we didn't need them.

sadandanxious Sun 26-Feb-17 19:14:19

I'm currently undergoing EMDR therapy. I've had two sessions so far and I've found it weird as. I didn't read much about it beforehand and I question whether what I'm experiencing is normal. From what I can gather there is no right or wrong when it comes to the number of sessions or how it feels for you. Some people are fine after one (I wish! ) others need hours upon hours. I really hope it goes okay for you. Try to take care of yourself afterwards, have some self care planned.

NewPuppyMum Sun 26-Feb-17 20:01:53

Given how ahit everyone is at the moment I think I'll take my dog and fuck off for the day after

sadandanxious Sun 26-Feb-17 20:21:15

I'm sorry everything is so shit for you at the moment.

I'm having a camera up my bum soon too. It's crap isn't it. It can be scary with so many things going on. I do hope EMDR helps you. flowers to you

NewPuppyMum Sun 26-Feb-17 21:13:02

Thank you and I'm sorry for your worries too.

I've just had enough really and feel I have no control or choices in my life.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Sun 26-Feb-17 21:56:39

I had a similar therapy called Eye movement integration. Felt fantastic after, no anxiety, flashbacks or anything. I was completely exhausted though couldn't have done any other appointments that day. My symptoms haven't returned I had 1 session. Mine was a 1 off traumatic event that started things off, though worked through events right back to early childhood in the session.

NewPuppyMum Mon 27-Feb-17 07:25:07

I'm so confused about it all. I get what needs doing and of course, why, but I'm scared. Things are going to change and I'm not good with change confused.

PastysPrincess Mon 27-Feb-17 07:47:29

The good thing about EMDR is that it is risk free. It can't make it worse; if you feel it's too much at the time you can just stop. You aren't adding anything or having to discuss details in depth. Sometimes change is for the better.

Beat Wishes for today flowers

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Mon 27-Feb-17 08:17:33

Showing my ignorance... what is EMDR?

I know I am being lazy because I could search it.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Mon 27-Feb-17 10:03:35

Eye movement desensitisation ... can't rememver the R. When you experience trauma the cortisol levels that cause the fight, flight or freeze reaction can intefere with the memory storing process between the hipocampus and the amadgella in the brain. Thats what gives you flashbacks. You use eye movements when accessing and storing memories. EMDR and EMI get you touse specific patterns of eye movements whilst thinking about thetraumatic event which allows you to store and process the memory properly and remove the Itensely difficult emotions that are attatched to the memory. For example before EMI I couldnt think about or talk about the trauma as it triggered flashbacks. Now I can think about it the memories are still unpleasant but don't trigger pannic the way they did.

PastysPrincess Mon 27-Feb-17 10:19:03

The R is Reprocessing.

sadandanxious Mon 27-Feb-17 13:09:29

NewPuppy good luck today. I hope it goes well for you flowers

NewPuppyMum Mon 27-Feb-17 14:16:14

I'm back. I had unrelated therapy this morning so was already very upset then I had a mix up at the pharmacy so no inhaler and I barely had ten minutes with my puppy before I had to go to the EMDR appointment. Spent first half hour talking about why I was upset this morning and then we did some planning. No trauma work today but I'm struggling with wanting to process why I'm upset and just get on with my day confused. Also annoyed as feel like I wasted my chance to start by wasting the first half hour.

sadandanxious Mon 27-Feb-17 15:47:54

Try not to feel bad about that. That happened to me too where I spent so long chatting about other things that I then didn't want to start the emdr halfway through. It's okay, you'll get there. It sounds like today was a really busy and stressful day for you so perhaps it's good it's been put off.

NewPuppyMum Mon 27-Feb-17 16:59:47

Luckily I only see the other therapist every few weeks and hopefully what upset me today won't happen again. Puppy has been a naughty pickle but I managed fine so that's boosted me. Now if only I could get DS to do as I ask hmm.

Still no inhaler. Have to ring back in an hour which is a really bad time for me to go out but while I could manage without it until tomorrow, when I could go and get it they are shut so best to go tonight.

I've written down salient points from both appointments as I'll forget otherwise and won't be able to talk to dh about it until later. Plus sometimes I need to talk about it more than once.

Thank you for chatting with me.

sadandanxious Mon 27-Feb-17 18:16:42

How old is your DS? Hope you managed to get somewhere with the GP.

Writing down things seems very sensible after therapy. It's hard to remember everything going on.

Chatting more than once is pretty normal I think. Sometimes our mind processes things and then it thinks of other things which need chatting through or even the same thing but different parts are processed.

PastysPrincess Mon 27-Feb-17 18:59:26

I had several appointments where we didn't do the processing, we chatted about what was upsetting me instead. Do you have long to wait until your next appointment?

NewPuppyMum Mon 27-Feb-17 19:13:50

DS is 11.

Has taken forever but finally I have my inhaler.

I think we've had five appointments where we've talked as a way to find out what I need the help with. I will see her every week for five weeks then have a week off and then twice more of five weeks on and one off.

I've been out an hour to get the prescription and my puppy really missed me. She cried when I went to the loo while waiting outside and practically say in my dinner trying to get as close as possible grin.

NolongerAnxiousCarer Mon 27-Feb-17 21:54:49

Glad that you got through a difficult day. I'm not sure how different EMDR is to the EMI I had but I found even 10 minutes, (It was a therapist I know who I bumped into when I was really strugling) made a huge difference. Infact it stopped my flashbacks and pannic attacks for a few weeks until my psychologist triggered them again.

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