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Does anyone else feel worse during school holidays?

(8 Posts)
minesapintofwine Mon 20-Feb-17 18:15:45

I'm a sahm and have depression. With a routine I sort of manage to control it, but I find school holidays hard. I think it's the lack of routine. Also the housework builds up a bit. I just seem to lose motivation. I try to get out with the dc often but not really on top of my mh this week (half term here).

Does anyone else feel like this and have any suggestions how to cope?

bringonthetrumpets Mon 20-Feb-17 18:25:06

Yes, I do tend to feel this way as well when the kids are home. Also have D&A. Just started taking meds last week so they haven't kicked in fully yet. I've been in therapy for just over 6 months now and finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

The best tool that I've received in therapy has been to consider the small things that you accomplish in a day as actual achievements. You got out of bed today! That's hard, but you did it! You made breakfast for your kids - you did a great thing for them! You took a shower, or brushed your teeth, or put on some nice clothes, those are all things that might have felt hard, but you did it! Also working on mindfulness while you are accomplishing those tasks. Paying attention to the things that you're doing. Even the very mundane small things because they add up and they are still achievements. Letting go of those expectations of yourself; like having a clean house, or having a schedule, or feeling like you HAVE to have things planned when you're feeling really low and you'd rather just have the kids watch TV. They are going to be fine and you are doing the best that you can do. Give yourself that allowance to do the best that you can do, even though some days it's not the same as others. Sometimes just taking things 1 hour at a time is the only way through the day too.

minesapintofwine Mon 20-Feb-17 18:28:10

Thankyou bring. I'm definately going to try that. I just feel completely off my game today. I just feel like crying for no apparant reason! confused

bringonthetrumpets Mon 20-Feb-17 18:35:09

It's absolutely OK to have an off day. Do you have any friends or family around that you can see if they will take the kids for a bit so you can get a bit of self-care in? Good food? Shower/bath? Nap?

Rubyslippers7780 Mon 20-Feb-17 18:35:32

It is hard - especially when routine is gone. Focus on the fact it is for a set number of days. Knowing that for 5 days the house will be messier or jobs not done is OK because it is only for a short block of time. As pp says each thing is an accomplishment - and don't worry about loads of activities. The kids need down time / movies / relax at home too. I feel there can be too much pressure to be having an amazing fun filled experience every holiday or weekend. An activity can break up the time and get out of the house but simple stuff that doesn't stress you out too ( I hate the pressure of driving and not finding the place and missing what we paid for etc etc )

minesapintofwine Mon 20-Feb-17 18:41:08

I do have family that had mentioned they would help during the holidays. In fact on the back of this thread I might text my mil as Im sure she would be willing to help! Also might cancel a day out on Wednesday as we have plans for every single day hmm.

bringonthetrumpets Mon 20-Feb-17 18:56:45

That sounds like a really good idea! I'm glad you do have resources to fall back on. smile

minesapintofwine Mon 20-Feb-17 19:35:22

Thank you all. I hope this doesn't sound horrible but I'm glad to not be the only one that feels this way (when dc are off) makes me feel less alone and more normal.

My mil is having dc tomorrow smile

The problem is term time I do practice really good self care so I barely even notice mh issues (very occasionally). I look forward to the dc being home but my mh goes downhill every time. I think I need to plan holidays better instead of just assuming I'll be ok. Perhaps an activity every other day. Something to think of at Easter anyway.

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