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How to stay positive in the face of negativity from others, and not get dragged down?

(4 Posts)
Flingmoo Mon 30-Jan-17 11:44:12

For the second year now, I've had a low performance rating at work. I feel like I've done my best but clearly it's not enough. My manager tried to be kind with her comments and didn't make it too personal, but you still hear words like "low performance behaviours" and the negativity starts to flow around in my head for hours afterwards. At the time I shrug it off but the effects of the words just seem to increase as time goes by.

I can tell that if I don't combat these negative feelings soon it's going to get on top of me and I'll descend into anxiety and depression. It's hard to nip the negative thoughts in the bud when it's not just purely made-up irrational thoughts though - this negative feedback about me is coming from other people, it's not just in my head. I can't just dismiss it as anxiety when someone else has formally verbalised and quantified my crapness!

So how do you stay strong in the face of this sort of negativity and not let it crush you?

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Mon 30-Jan-17 15:15:49

Get a full on health check..

Vitamin D, thyroxin etc... I had a very poor time some 8 years back got bullied by management. was put on a capability review because of my work.. (an excuse to get rid of me.) It turned out I had sarcoidosis and was close to having a chat with that chappie on the big black horse, the one who carries a scythe.. Sometimes poor performance is the symptom of something serious underneath..

Flingmoo Mon 30-Jan-17 16:59:02

Thanks. I see what you mean. I do actually have an underactive thyroid and I'm also 5 months pregnant. My manager said in my performance review that I don't seem myself recently. To be honest I don't feel like I'm behaving any different to usual (whatever 'usual' is) - but maybe my pregnancy tiredness is coming across.

AnxiousCarer Mon 30-Jan-17 20:33:16

Did she give you any constructive advice about how to improve your performance? Do you want to improve it right now, or just get through the next few months till your mat leave, then start afresh when you go back. At the moment I can understand work may not be your priority.

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