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How can I help my Dad?

(6 Posts)
SquillosMum Wed 21-Feb-07 20:35:43

Ever since my Dad retired (aged 60) nearly 4 years ago, I think he has become increasingly depressed. He was in quite a high powered job and initially did some consultancy for the company he worked for. Recently he has been applying for non-exec directorships but hasn't been successful. I don't think he was ready to retire and needs to feel like he's useful. He has just been prescribed pills for high cholesterol and high blood pressure which he doesn't want to take, but he's basically pretty healthy, a bit over weight perhaps. He probably drinks too much wine which may be a factor too. We've had a couple of family tragedies recently - my sister lost twin girls (still born at term) and my son nearly died from acute liver failure and had a transplant last year. I know that both of these have affected my Dad deeply.

So what can I do to help? I think counselling might be good for him, but I don't think he would go to the GP himself about this. I have talked to him about keeping a food & drink diary to see if he can improve his diet to help with medical probs. He takes some exercise and walks quite a lot. Any suggestions to help me help him - I hate him being so down and my Mum is finding it hard to cope with too.

Themis Wed 21-Feb-07 20:47:39

how about some volunteer work, your Dad must have lots of skills that he could use and someone else will find benefit from.

check out local volunterr bureau

might find useful

Swizzler Wed 21-Feb-07 20:49:34

Could you get him interested in a hobby? What about researching his family history - would keep him occupied and could include lots of trips out of the house (to help your mum out

Themis Wed 21-Feb-07 20:54:02

Or this

learning mentor

spudmasher Wed 21-Feb-07 20:56:14

I am in a very similar situation. Isn't it strange how the roles reverse?

My dad loves phone calls, e mails of photos of the kids, silly things they have made him in the post (we live a long way away)

Is your dad into technology? Mine has found great pleasure in being a silver surfer, spending hours on the internet looking at things like Google earth.

Like yours mine has health problems- just diagnosed with cancer. Support your mum as they are the ones who have to put up with it day and night and ime men are not geat at being ill.

SquillosMum Wed 21-Feb-07 20:59:57

Thanks for advice & links. My Dad is into the internet & digital photos, but doesn't have many other hobbies. I've tried suggesting things in the past, but I think it's hard for him to get in the right mood to do something new - this is why I think he may have depression?
Luckily he does talk to me and so does my Mum so I do try and help both of them.

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