Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, see our mental health web guide which can point you to expert advice.
Anxiety? Post Xmas blues? Something else?(2 Posts)
I'm not sure if I've posted in the right topic and I apologise if this is a bit of a ramble as I'm not really sure myself how I'm feeling but I'm sure there's something I can do about it I just don't know what!
On the face of it (and according to Facebook!)I have the perfect life, great job, lovely family, nice house, lots of friends, great social life. However, particularly over the Xmas break I've felt shit. I'm not sure if it's anxiety or just Xmas blues or a wake up call that I need to take a long hard look at myself? I have spent most of the break comparing myself to others, feeling down- fat and frumpy- but mainly shit about friends. We've hosted a Xmas party that went brilliantly and had friends for Xmas eve and Xmas day and attended a ball and large Xmas party. Howevever, other than one Xmas party all of our social activities have been organised by me. I'm feeling down and paranoid that we've had no invites back. There are two local New Year's Eve parties that most of our circle are invited to but we have been left out. One is expected, a neighbour who dislikes me intensely but I don't really know why. This has upset me a lot and made me question all of my other relationships. I've started noticing that other friends get dinner and drinks invites, their kids are invited for sleep overs etc when we aren't and feel that unless I do the inviting we wouldn't see anyone, although people are always happy to come.
I'm consumed by this worry and am starting to dread going back to work (a job I'm pretty good at) as I'm doubting myself so much and feel I'm going to fail at my job. I'm starting to worry the neighbour dislikes me as I'm a nasty person and that's why we also get less invites socially than others we know. I'm confused as to whether the issue is genuinely with me or I'm suffering from anxiety?
I'm exercising when I can which helps but eating my body weight in cheese which doesn't help. I'm dreading new year and watching the party we aren't invited to (can see the house from my window ) and the others play out on face book. I know deleting FB is a start but doesn't change the underlying issues.
This is a ramble, I feel shit, can anyone help me make sense of what's going on and things I can do to improve my mental health? My husband although lovely thinks I'm being ridiculous. I'm not sure if I need to look at being nicer to people or to learn to stop being so hurt when we are left out of things or cultivate the true friendships we have? I currently feel jealous, needy and pathetic all of the time.
The negative side of social media is that it gives a constant bench mark to judge yourself and your life by. And most people only show the good bits of therir life to others so it gives a very biased view.
I think its common to feel a bit low this time of year too. It sounds like you have been very busy over Christmas with social events. Other than visiting family DHs work do, we haven't done anything and are both looking forward to staying in NYE snuggled infront of the tv, but then DH and I dont really have many friends other than each other, so you can compare your social life with ours if it helps .
On a more serious note, if these thoughts are persistant and starting to cause you problems maybe a visit to your GP is in order. You could be depressed, you don't need to have a particular reason with depression.
Join the discussion
Please login first.