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Revenge porn

(25 Posts)
user1482825879 Tue 27-Dec-16 08:22:15

Hi a couple of months ago I had my google mail account hacked and my yahoo mail account hacked. Through this the hacker hacked my Facebook and sent private messages to others. I got the Facebook taken down but last week I started getting messages to my new Facebook and lots of calls in the evening off private numbers which I ignored. But one morning I actually looked at the messages and it was off random people some telling me my private pictures to a previous boyfriend was actually on a revenge porn site. I'd never heard of revenge porn and have never actually sent a naked picture to anyone but had sent pictures in my underwear to a previous bf. These pictures I no longer have on my phone but I'm assuming they're on back up on gmail or was on my email accounts that had been hacked. The pictures are bad enough but this hacker has put that I'm mentally ill with scitzophrenia and I'm a cheat who takes people's men. They have put that i pop out babies and blame my exes for everything. Non of which is true but they've also given my place of work which is the NHS, they've given where I live and links to my social media, they've given my number out too. It's been awful. I rang police last Friday but not heard anything back. The comments I've seen to these pictures have knocked me sick. One said I wouldn't have that slut looking after my family. I'm worried I'm going to get the sack, I'm worried my friends and family will see the pictures. I've had to try and stop myself from ending my life for my children's sake but I'm finding it really hard. I have no one to turn to because I'm so ashamed about people knowing. I no longer know what to do. Even this post I feel like the hacker will see and share that with everyone.

Bluntness100 Tue 27-Dec-16 08:25:09

Call the police again and chase them up. This isn't about you, this is some sicko harassing you. Tell them it's harassment and revenge porn and you want action. Do you know who it is that's doing this?

user1482825879 Tue 27-Dec-16 08:33:25

I've no idea who is doing it. And the sick vulgar messages I read have been awful. It's been that long since I took the pictures I'd completely forgotten about them. Some are just face shots they must have taken from my Facebook when the hacked it. From what I read online it's impossible to get the pictures removed. I've had to take down my Facebook, I can't access my twitter account because it's been hacked through the email I had on there so can't even remove my twitter account because they've changed all the details. I've had to keep Facebook messenger because that's how my 15 year old contacts me while I do 13 hour shifts. I'm going to try the police again later but if I don't know who is doing it how will they be able to find out? They didn't sound that interested tbh.

Bluntness100 Tue 27-Dec-16 08:49:44

They should be able to absolutely yes, just keep on at them. Good luck, you will get it resolved, 💐

QuiltedAloeVera Tue 27-Dec-16 08:55:43

Please talk to someone about how you are feeling.

0845 6000 459 - Revenge Porn Helpline
116 123 - Samaritans

It's extremely unlikely friends/family will stumble on those pictures. People who look at and comment on revenge porn sites are deeply nasty and pathetic. They have a serious problem with their attitudes to women. The comments they leave are not what the average stranger would think, let alone what your friends and family would think. Personally, I think it must be absolutely horrible to have your privacy invaded and to be threatened in the way you have been. I hope no one does the same to me as they have to you, but one day they might, because taking/sending sexy pictures is a really quite normal thing to do, and I've done it a few times, your friends probably have too.

You have done nothing wrong. flowers

ophiotaurus Tue 27-Dec-16 09:06:31

Your link has totally freaked me out. I clicked on it and it took me to the vanity fair site and there was a pop up with my email address. What is this for? Feeling her uneasy.

ophiotaurus Tue 27-Dec-16 09:07:16

Feeling very I mean son hopping around next to me on couch pressed post to soon.

PleaseDoNotTagMe Tue 27-Dec-16 09:14:55

Good post Quilted.

You absolutely must keep trying the get help. The one time I needed help from the police I found it hard to deal with that they weren't helpful at all. Not like on tv, which is, I suppose, how I thought it was going to be! Similarly, I was put in a situation where I thought everyone knew what had happened, every time I went to a shop or anything I thought that people in there would know what happened. Now I am not 'in it' I realise how hugely unlikely that would have been.

Everyday people are not going to have seen the photos or the comments. The people who have commented have had to look hard to find them and its part of it that they know it's revenge porn and that the poster of the photos wants them to behave like that. Saying horrible things.

If you were my friend or you treated me at your work and I had seen them, which is very, very unlikely indeed, I would not think you had done anything wrong and I would have nothing but compassion for you.

QuiltedAloeVera Tue 27-Dec-16 09:15:03

Aargh sorry about that - maybe because I was on my phone? Googling Jennifer Lawrence Vanity Fair October 2014 should find the relevant article.

user1482825879 Tue 27-Dec-16 09:15:10

I just googled that article I didn't realise how common this kind of thing is and how people can get away with destroying people's lives. I miss my Facebook, I have even put my calls and texts on do not disturb. I feel like I've had to go into hiding and it's really sad. I don't think I'll ever be able to find out who is doing it but they seem bent on destroying me.

user1482825879 Tue 27-Dec-16 09:17:43

Thank you so much for them kind words. I don't think I should hide anymore but I am mortified and slightly scared that they know so much information about me, like my work and where I live etc. The whole thing just seems like a nightmare x

mortificado Tue 27-Dec-16 09:21:44

So sorry for you op. Have a crazy ex that could of new your passwords etc? I'd give the police another call, & demand something is done!

ophiotaurus Tue 27-Dec-16 09:22:17

Sorry just freaked out because my email address came up.

PleaseDoNotTagMe Tue 27-Dec-16 09:22:52

The link worked for me.

Relevant bit.

And for Jennifer, it's gone beyond terrifying. Two weeks after our meeting, nude photographs of the actress were hacked and posted on several sites, including 4Chan, Reddit, Twitter, and Tumblr, adding to the already considerable pitfalls of her intense fame. Other celebrities, such as Kate Upton, Kirsten Dunst, and Mary Elizabeth Winstead, also fell victim to the hacking, and the F.B.I. is now investigating. “I was just so afraid,” Jennifer now says. “I didn't know how this would affect my career.”
^
She says her first thought was to write a public statement, “but every single thing that I tried to write made me cry or get angry. I started to write an apology, but I don't have anything to say I'm sorry for. I was in a loving, healthy, great relationship for four years. It was long distance, and either your boyfriend is going to look at porn or he's going to look at you.”
She tells of her shock when the private, intimate photos surfaced on the Internet. “I can't even describe to anybody what it feels like to have my naked body shoot across the world like a news flash against my will. It just makes me feel like a piece of meat that's being passed around for a profit.”^

^
^She's particularly angry at celebrity blogger Perez Hilton, who posted the photographs on his Web site, then took them down. As Jennifer says, “He took it down because people got pissed, and that's the only reason why. And then I had to watch his apology. And what he basically said was ‘I just didn't think about it.’ ‘I just didn't think about it’ is not an excuse. That is the exact issue itself.
“Just because I'm a public figure, just because I'm an actress, does not mean that I asked for this. It does not mean that it comes with the territory. It's my body, and it should be my choice, and the fact that it is not my choice is absolutely disgusting. I can't believe that we even live in that kind of world.
“People forget that we're human.”^
^
Part of Jennifer's anger and frustration is that there's so little she can do about it. She can't become un-famous. She can't quit her job. “I can't not act. It's what I was made to do, and I swear to God, it's the only thing that I'm good at, but that does not mean that I deserve to live like this. When I have to make that phone call to my dad and tell him what's happened . . . I don't care how much money I get for The Hunger Games. . . . I promise you, anybody given the choice of that kind of money or having to make a phone call to tell your dad that something like that has happened, it's not worth it.” She allows herself to joke a little about that terrible moment: “Fortunately, he was playing golf, so he was in a good mood.”^
^
She feels just as strongly about the way the entire incident has been reported. “It is not a scandal. It is a sex crime. It is a sexual violation,” she says. “It's disgusting. The law needs to be changed, and we need to change.” Jennifer has a hard time understanding the mentality of those who so violently hacked into her private life. “That's why these Web sites are responsible. Just the fact that somebody can be sexually exploited and violated, and the first thought that crosses somebody's mind is to make a profit from it. It's so beyond me. I just can't imagine being that detached from humanity. I can't imagine being that thoughtless and careless and so empty inside.” Nor can she forgive those people who were so eager to view the photos. “Anybody who looked at those pictures, you're perpetuating a sexual offense. You should cower with shame,” she says. “Even people who I know and love say, ‘Oh, yeah, I looked at the pictures.’ I don't want to get mad, but at the same time I'm thinking, I didn't tell you that you could look at my naked body.”^

ophiotaurus Tue 27-Dec-16 09:22:55

And so sorry for what is happening OP. I would definitely chase up the police.

user1482825879 Tue 27-Dec-16 09:28:28

Thank you I'm going to ring them again later I've hardly slept and been on 13 hour shifts but not letting this go. I just read that article and I'm no longer going to hide. I've not done anything wrong and shouldn't be ashamed. I'm hurt st the comments too. It says I have scitsophrenia which I don't but I did have one episode of psychosis due to being sexually assaulted two years ago. Not that having mental illness is anything to be ashamed of but it is private and I got a bit scared at how much this person knows as i don't tell many people. I'm going to ring the police today. I'm not holding my breath though x

WellKnackered Tue 27-Dec-16 09:50:38

How awful. I know it must be hard but anyone with an ounce of respect wouldn't look at that type of site let alone comment on it etc. unfortunately your photos will be one of many.

Keep reminding yourself that you have done NOTHING wrong.

I'd close every account and I'd Also change my phone numbers. It will be a massive pain but I'd rather do that than worry about where my number is.

I know this must be horrific for you but everyone knows it's the type of thing that could happen to anyone (well almost!)

RandomMcRandomer Tue 27-Dec-16 09:57:23

So sorry you are going through this. Call police again. Keep on at them.

Open a new email account that doesn't use your full name so something like jen365 rather than Jen smith so it's less easy to connect it to you. Only give this address to people you trust. Don't shut down the old ones yet as police may need them but don't look at them. Delete anything private and unrelated to the revenge porn then just don't look.

Open new social media accounts. Use a profile and header pic that don't have your photo on. Whack your privacy settings on the top level so people can't search for you. You could also use a first name middle name combo for extra privacy.

Get a new phone number. Again only give to those you trust.

If people ask tell them you are being harassed (which is true) and just want to wipe the slate clean and start again. You don't need to mention the photos.

If your full name, location and place of work are mentioned it may be worth confiding in a manager you can trust in case anyone tries to contact you that way.

Remember this is a CRIME against you. You are the victim here and 99.9% people will be horrified.

WellKnackered Tue 27-Dec-16 10:00:48

You are the victim here and 99.9% people will be horrified

Small comfort but I think it will be more like 99.999999 % will be horrified. Unfortunately there are a few terrible people on the world but this is a particularly nasty thing to do.

user1482825879 Tue 27-Dec-16 10:24:49

Thank you so much for your kind words. I'm going to try police again but I'm not holding my breath. I'm definitely going to try and see a doctor because I'll end up paranoid I can feel it already. I can't believe that there are sick people like this in the world x

WellKnackered Tue 27-Dec-16 10:27:34

Might telling people help. I would hope that you would get a lot of support and sympathy?

Also, read up on the stats. You are not alone by a long way.

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Wed 28-Dec-16 09:12:41

If you don't get help from the police... write to your MP... and also find out which MP's campaign about this and copy them in..

Police hate it when an MP asks questions..

user1482825879 Wed 28-Dec-16 09:31:49

Oooo thanks for that advice I'll try that. It's been nearly a week since I reported it and not even had a call back

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Wed 28-Dec-16 09:51:36

OP,
You say your Yahoo account was hacked... I seem to recall Yahoo lost millions of passwords and identities to hackers some time ago.

user1482825879 Wed 28-Dec-16 10:09:42

This was two months ago though. Only had my yahoo account maybe a year

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