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No one is understanding about my mental health illness

(3 Posts)
TwoBrokeGirls Mon 21-Nov-16 16:10:50

I have recently been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, having been diagnosed with depression mistakenly for several years beforehand.

My problem is that when I am feeling down and in one of my low phases none of my friends and family seem to actually give a shit and they just either ignore the fact that I'm unwell and struggling and expect me to carry on as normal, or they just stay away from me until I'm feeling ok again.

When I am down I struggle to do things in the house and to carry on normally with work but when I am in these periods of low mood my DH won't pick up any slack at all, and the house turns into a shit hole which makes me feel really guilty and even worse than I originally did as I feel a failure. I manage to care for the kids when I am low but DH won't do any of the extras such as help them with their homework or take them to their activities. My family just don't bother with me if I am feeling down.

My work have been useless despite a colleague having the same illness. They bend over backwards to accommodate her and never complain if she is off work sick or is struggling. I told my boss about my diagnosis and he has barely acknowledged it and just seems to want to work me to the bone.

My friends also stay away if I am feeling low and although I told close friends about my diagnosis I just got "Oh dear" type responses and no one has asked since how I am feeling or if I'm ok.

I guess I just feel really alone sad

AnxiousCarer Mon 21-Nov-16 22:35:39

Hi, you are not alone. I don't have bipolar, but I know theres quite a few people on this board who do. Unfortunately theres still so much silence about mental health issues, so many people just don't have any understanding or any idea how to react, or what to do to help.

From a work perspective bipolar is covered by the disability discrimination act, so they are required to make reasonable adjustments for you. Speak to occupational health at your work and ask for an assessment with them, they can make reccommendations to your manager.

Do you have support from a MH team? My DHs team have done work with me too to help me understand his condition. I wonder if yours would work with your DH too. The 2 of you will need to work as a team to support each other through the tough times DHs team have really helped (and are still helping) us both get our head around DHs condition and how it affects us both.

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Mon 21-Nov-16 22:47:08

Broke Girls..

Welcome to the club.. You are in good company here..

. I am also a fruitcake manic depressive... and yes I got the cold shoulder at work... I try my best when I am feeling bad... Don't bother too much about housework... Do you rally want your grqvestone to say... She wore out a lot of vacuum cleaners? if not it doesn't matter in the greater schems of things... Besides if you wait a month between getting out the vac... you do get a feally good sense of wow.... This suddenly looks wonderful...

As to friends... MH is still a difficult issue... Would that it were different.

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