Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, see our mental health web guide which can point you to expert advice.

Struggling with the human race

(22 Posts)
rumred Tue 08-Nov-16 21:37:02

I'm depressed and off work. Work was dreadful but I'm struggling generally with the vileness of the human race. I do know there's goodness, I love the kindness of strangers, friends and family. But I'm so saddened by general meanness and people eating animals. It seriously hurts me. I've been reading the gwyneth Lewis book and am trying to accept my depression and learn from it. But the evil of humans bothers me.
Anyone else felt like this?

OhtoblazeswithElvira Tue 08-Nov-16 21:40:57

I feel like that every now and again, especially following terrorist attacks, violence against women... then I remember that most people are decent and trying their best - just like you.

Sorry, I have no advice, only flowers I hope you feel better soon.

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Tue 08-Nov-16 21:59:54

I came through a mental breakdown that started about ten years ago..

I will never be "normal" but these days I am mostly OK.. I come here to try and help people because I remember the pain I went through. There is goodness in the world. Indeed, most people are decent and caring. However they don't make the headlines.

rumred Tue 08-Nov-16 22:13:09

Thanks for your messages. Indeed there are good people but I see so much selfishness and greed around. And idle cruelty. Like people who keep small animals that die in misery.
I'm acutely aware of the pain caused to animals and children. I wish I lived in ignorance. Watching the Christmas ads etc. gaily but I don't.

cauliflowercheese14 Wed 09-Nov-16 13:15:36

I am struggling with the human race today too. My anxiety is sky high, I can't stop crying and I want it all to be a terrible nightmare. I fear so much for the future, I can't concentrate at all on the moment. Everyone else seems to be carrying on as normal. They can't be can they? How can I get a grip? My mind is racing through all the potential horrific scenarios to occur as a result of the US election and I cannot stop it.

cauliflowercheese14 Wed 09-Nov-16 13:17:20

rumred to address your comment I see selfishness, greed and rabid consumerism everywhere too. I can't engage with stuff like Xmas as it's all about consumption and getting more and more and more stuff. I hate hate hate it.

dangermouseisace Wed 09-Nov-16 19:32:04

I think what has gone on today has exacerbated things.

I don't understand how so many people could be xenophobic- first here in Britain, then in the US.

And yes to the eating animals thing- just how? My kids do it, and they are happy to. I couldn't, and don't.

I also get very worried about the environment…all the cars, pollution. The amount of plastic…

But…on the plus side…I remember that our human race are a tiny blip in the history of the earth. Miniscule. The dinosaurs went on forever…we are only a teeny tiny weeny thing. Insignificant. And there is so much backlash about 'things' now, especially amongst my generation/social circle (late 30's early 40's) so I'm assuming the same must be happening in younger people.

rumred Wed 09-Nov-16 19:59:46

useful thoughts, thanks. remembering how insignificant we are does help at times. yet i still feel i should be doing more....

im sorry you feel so crap cauliflower i am ignoring the trump stuff as far as possible, I know I cant influence any of it or how things pan out. but as dangermouse says, its all rather tiny in the wider context. and we have had awful leaders since time began. obviously some worse than others. the fact obama had 2 terms gives me some hope. but the christmas madness? grim. Im dreading the mawkish john lewis ad, money grabbing disguised as caring and cuteness. and the rest

I suppose my sadness is about feeling insignificant and that life is pointless. this thread actually has given me a bit of a kick up the arse. perhaps being good and kind is enough? looking for greater meaning and a big role hasnt worked.

Crystal15 Wed 09-Nov-16 20:09:51

Remember media in general mostly only shares the tragic scare mongering stuff. Yes we aren't perfect but there are far more good people in the world then bad. Otherwise we would have died out long ago. Attitudes aren't ideal, but there are many beautiful souls. The beautiful ones have imperfections but far out weigh the darkness in this world.

cauliflowercheese14 Wed 09-Nov-16 20:32:26

Yes feeling insignificant and pointless is how I feel rumred. I don't know whether being good and kind is enough but it's certainly better than the opposite. I feel better if I am kind so it's not just altruism. I sometimes try to do x number of kind things a day. Today very much felt like one of those days so I clocked up the following: updated confused person on platform about a delayed train, told other person her shoelace was undone, texted friend with PND to see how she was, lifted buggy off a bus for someone. All nothing much but made me feel a bit more connected and useful.

I also get upset about plastic and general things too dangermouse. I am glad to hear you think other people do too, I see people loaded up with Primark bags and despair. I try to buy secondhand as much as I can and to really think about whether we need whatever it might be. But then does it make any difference. I want cars banned and decent public transport instead but instead it's the other way. Why can nobody see what we're doing and how it will end? The lack of coverage of climate change enrages me?!

DH watching rolling news of Trump now. I think I'll have to go and hide in bed. If I went to the GP about this would they take me seriously?

Pyrrha Wed 09-Nov-16 20:39:33

I give money to a local animal charity, used to volunteer but I work weeekends now but I found that helped my depression so much. Is there a wildlife sanctuary or anything near you that you could volunteer for?

rumred Wed 09-Nov-16 22:06:56

cauliflower thats all good stuff. i can sympathise with seeing the other stuff that brings you down. it's exhausting at times. i wonder if Im super sensitive/observant. others seem not to notice, generally, the shite around.

no solutions Ive found im afraid to deal with the noticing

pyrrha i foster dogs and work in a people helping field but Im burnt out now work wise so looking for something where im not faced daily with human cruelty and neglect. but yes getting involved in something good can make a difference. it doesnt prevent the awareness of misery which is what im struggling with, and so too are others above

Itisnoteasybeingdifferent Thu 10-Nov-16 07:47:21

I ran a Guest House for four years. Over that time we had many many lovely people through our front door. Sadly, I can't remember the majority of them. I can, however, remember the nasty shits who caused me some significant problems.

I once did and add up of the numbers and calculatd that 99% of our guests were lovely. If that is a reflection of humanity in general it still leaves the remaining 1% who cause the trouble in the world. Sadly that 1% can cause a lot of trouble and by sheer weight of numbers there are a quite a lot of them. So in my home town of some 20,000 there are probably some 200 nasty little shits. If just 10% of them (or 20 people) got together for a nights drinking they could give you the impression this place is hell hole of nastyness.

In fact it is a lovely, if somewhat dull, town full of decent people.

cauliflowercheese14 Thu 10-Nov-16 23:10:14

itsnot that's very true as the minority cause disproportionate grief. Today I found the banal chat at playgroup helped me feel better.

rumred I've often thought I'm hypersensitive. If I see a person suffering I over empathize and can often have tears in my eyes over all sorts, people telling me something sad, the news is almost impossible for me to watch on tv. The plight of refugees has me in tears and helpless rage. My mum is like this too so maybe I learned it from her?

cauliflowercheese14 Thu 10-Nov-16 23:11:26

rumred I was in a caring profession but burned out too. Maybe we've absorbed too much?

Jinglebellsarenearlyhere Sun 13-Nov-16 06:59:05

Is hyersensitive a thing? So much of what you have all said is how I feel too. It makes my depression so much worse to live with when you add the suffering of others and the world to my thoughts.

rumred Mon 14-Nov-16 07:59:39

There's some research about hypersensitivity. I should look it up really. Agree jinglebells it makes depression so much harder to deal with.
I'm trying the distraction approach currently. Getting other stuff done, avoiding the news and spending time with friends who I can talk to about how I feel. It's good to get alternative viewpoints

Yes cauliflower it makes sense that you learned the behaviour from your mum. How does she manage it?

I hope we all managed some happiness this weekend.

rumred Mon 14-Nov-16 08:02:15

Oh and yes about caring professions. I think they have a shelf life and I've gone way over mine in a pointless attempt to do the right thing. Are you doing something less harrowing/stressful now cauliflower ?

rustyunicorn Mon 14-Nov-16 10:49:40

rumred I feel the same too.

There seems to be so much hatred in the world these days and a complete obsession with materialism and people looking perfect (I worry so much about the world my 11 and 8 yr old are growing up in).

I have got to stop looking on social media and the media in general. I really do thinking that the papers love to over-play the awful things happening in the world. There are lots of great things too.

I am not good with links but there was a story over the weekend about a dog called Walnut. Google it. Its sad but so heartwarming and will make you see that there are some really lovely, good hearted people out there.

We must never lose faith in that smile

rumred Mon 14-Nov-16 14:21:44

Indeed rustyunicorn I see goodness every day , from strangers family and friends. I appreciate and am humbled by it. I'm just incapable of not seeing the misery.

Don't get me started on consumerism, particularly its impact on children. Just grim

rustyunicorn Mon 14-Nov-16 15:08:14

Me too rumred sad its almost an addiction, DH and my best friend never look on social media or the news and I have to say are in blissful happy ignorance most days but I just can't help it, I look at the Daily Mail website every day, I am just drawn to it and being a highly sensitive person makes the impact much worse for me. I totally understand you.

rumred Mon 14-Nov-16 20:54:17

I've stopped reading and watching the news generally. Im trying instead to read literature or come on here for entertainment and to keep the brain busy. I can't imagine the mail makes you happy??? But I do get the habit. I've deactivated my Facebook too though I will reactivate at some point because I enjoy the positive aspects of it but not until I'm more resilient

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now