Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, see our mental health web guide which can point you to expert advice.

Just need to get stuff of my chest....

(6 Posts)
Mum05122006 Sat 22-Oct-16 15:25:20

Hey,

Not really sure where to start with this, but I have so much rumbling around in my mind, that I just need to get it out in the open, and with no "close-friends" to listen to me, I've decided to let my fingers do the talking.

I work full time, but I also have 2 children. I have sorted out my work / home life balance and I think I'm Ok now (time-wise). But I can't help myself but work, work, work! It seems to be my one distraction that whenever I'm feeling shitty I can rely on.

I don't have any close-friends, my family don't really seem to care, my partner, whilst he is great, doesn't seem to take a lot of interest in stuff he doesn't already have an interest in, and the kids are both going through their own difficult growing up trials and tribulations.

I feel isolated, alone and with no-one to truly support me.

A lot of it is my own doing - I do recognise that. But I don't want to revisit it. I left home under a cloud, and whilst it was not all my fault, I don't want to apologise for my actions, when I'm not really sorry for what happened.

I'm not looking for sympathy. I'm not looking for a someone to tell me it will all be Ok or how to make amends with my past. I want to forget and move on, but I want to move on to where things go right.

In the last 10yrs I've had so many ups and downs. We've made amazing progress and my career is going great. But despite having the stuff I wanted (a good career and my own little family) I still feel like there is a gaping hole in my emotions. Something is missing - but I don't know what.

Maybe it's the lack of stability? Maybe the lack of friends or extended family? Could be no disposable income? Or maybe something else. But whatever it is, its slowly draining me. Everyday I feel a little bit more useless. Everyday I rely on my work to keep me going. Knowing its the one thing that I am truly good at, relied on to provide the right guidance and support.

I'm useless at home - I can't cook, I'm terrible at cleaning and even the children prefer to spend time with Daddy (or playing video games) than with me.

So what should I do? Continue as I am, and wait for destiny to change up my life again? Relocate the family and start over? What are my other options?!

Feels better getting it all off my chest, and for anyone reading, sorry if this post isn't in great English. I've let my fingers do the talking, but look forward to hearing any words of wisdom from my fellow Mums out there!

Thanks in advance for the cyber-support! xxxx

BecauseIamabear Sat 22-Oct-16 17:28:33

" Something is missing - but I don't know what."

One is tempted to suggest religion .. or someone to love as an equal, (not as a mum). Both option shave their pro's and con's.

If you go into any god based group (of whatever persuasion) they will instantly love bomb you, (unless they decide you have broken one of their tenants and must conform before being accepted), but I always wonder how much of that is real love and how much is expected behaviour. Equally finding a partner is fraught with problems.. Just read all the threads on AIBU about difficult relationships.. Actually, that might be a good idea anyway.. It sometimes helps to have a different perspective on life and seeing how other people don't always have it anywhere near as good as it may appear from the outside might help you to develop an idea of what you are really missing.

But regardless .. please keep posting. As you say yourself it helps. Oh and virtual hugs flowers

AnxiousCarer Sat 22-Oct-16 21:46:43

Hi,

Glad it helped to get things off your chest. Have you ever considered councelling? I've found it really useful on a few occasions to help me get things in perspective. It could be especially useful as you don't really know what is making you feel this way, it may help you work through any issues that you may not even know you have, that are niggling away at you.

Also do you spend any time doing things for you? Do you have any hobbies or interests? An evening class or weekend course in something, or a sports club might help to give you a focus out of work and also to meet new people and make new friends.

Mum05122006 Sat 22-Oct-16 22:07:34

Thanks both! Will have a think about your suggestions!! <3 xx

DizzyBlondeMum2 Sat 22-Oct-16 22:10:55

Have uou talked to your dh about how you feel? flowers glad it helps to share x

Haggisfish Sat 22-Oct-16 22:13:15

I found rediscovering my interests helped me a lot. Sewing. Walking and writing.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now