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Supporting partner

(4 Posts)
WhamBamThankYouStan Wed 12-Oct-16 16:37:21

Is anyone else supporting a partner through MH issues?

My dh has been diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression and has just started anti d's.

Struggling to find support for those supporting.

AnxiousCarer Wed 12-Oct-16 21:02:32

Hi, I support my DH who suffers with depression and psychosis. How are you doing?

WhamBamThankYouStan Thu 13-Oct-16 16:39:57

Thanks for your message.

I'm struggling with the unrelenting positivity required and the feeling of treading on eggshells.

It's such hard work. And then I feel guilty for calling my lovely dh hard work sad

AnxiousCarer Fri 14-Oct-16 22:09:44

It can be so exhausting and stressful supporting someone else, I know it so well. Don't feel bad my lovely DH is bloody hard work sometimes and I'm sure he feels the same about me sometimes too! Seriously though supporting someone with MH problems is hard work and you're allowed to feel this way. Its so easy to feel guilty for struggling when its the other person who is ill, but it affects us too, its ok to struggle and find things hard.

The most important piece of advice I can give you is to look after yourself. Make time for you to do things for you. If you go under then you can't support him. Don't let this depression swallow both of you.

I can definately relate to the eggshells thing. My other advice is that it's ok not to be positive all the time, it's ok to have a bad day, it's ok for him to know you are feeling stressed or down. The best thing you can do is to do normal stuff, talk about normal stuff. Yes encourage him to go out and do stuff together, but its ok to just do normal stuff too. It's not your job to cheer him up and make him happy, infact that is really hard to do as his brain chemicals are working against you. Just be there for him and know its ok for him to feel low, its horrible, but its ok.

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