Please can I offload?

[Lolimax]

Fellow MN'ers please help? I have a long and painful history of low grade mental illnesses and have been on and off AD's most of my adult life (I'm 46). The last 2 years have been very tough, I've been neurologically ill but have recovered well, I've lost my mum and more recently DH has been ill, diagnosed with 2 auto-immunes. But I've coped really well. So well in fact that in the past 6 months I've lost nearly 3 stone and have got fitter than I've been in years. I weaned myself off citalopram in March as they weren't doing anything (20mgs).
Then this week...I've had THE week from hell in work, major HR issue which is being dealt with plus other shit and all of a sudden I've lost my coping mechanisms. They've...gone. I cried to my boss on Friday, in fairness he was great. I've tried telling DH but he just thinks I'm doing too much exercise. I just want to run away and cry all the time. I have an over-whelming feeling of helplessness that is so bloody horribly familiar. I'm trying to be kind to myself and hoping it'll all go away in time for work in the morning but it's just getting worse.
Please someone send some positive thoughts as I'm not doing too well here. I've come out on my own and am presently sat in a tescos cafe as I really don't know what to do with myself.

[rumred]

having a big dip in mood is to be expected when youve got a lot on your plate, which you have at present. perhaps consider ADs again ? or try talking more about your feelings?
if youre feeling so low taking some time off work might be necessary so you can build back up again

sorry things are rough for you, it'll pass but i know it rarely feels like that

[AnxiousCarer]

Hi, sorry to hear you have a lot on your plate at the moment. As I'm sure you know thats the way depression goes, you cope and cope till somethings the last straw. Be kind to yourself take time off work if you need to, see your GP if you need to, keep up with the exercise too, it releases your bodys natural anti depressants.