Mid Life Crisis / Anxiety / Menopause?

[poppledopple]

I have had PND in the past but this experience is less the total physical wipe out depression - think more constant anxiety /numb / low mood. I believe I am menopausal - dont want to do ADs - cant to HRT (family cancer link) - The MLF is nothing exciting - have not done anything mad - not done anything at all - just holed up at home with zero interest in anyone or anything - dont want to live in this grey for years. How do I scramble out? Is anxiety caused by menopause treated/approached differently? I dont feel I have anything to look forward to, or plan. There is no joy / cheer /colour in my life. I wake every morning with a bolt - cant put my finger on any one issue that needs resolving.

[poppledopple]

*MLF = MLC mid life crisis...

[AnxiousCarer]

Have you tried councilling/cbt? I would speak to your GP and see where they can refer you onto. I know you don't want antidepressants, but they really can be very helpful to get you through the bad patch whilst you address other issues. Depression as a result of a chemical inballance in the brain which antidepressants help to address.

[poppledopple]

I really can't do ADs again - I have done years and years of titrating up doses, changing ADs and then having horrific times trying to get off them slowly. I felt like a puppet in a string. My current state of mind is not as catastrophic as before so I don't think they are warranted. I suppose I am worried about where the line is between anxiety and depression are they the same thing - just a spectrum? I have had counselling in the past - as I had major life incidents to address. But this time (menopause?) I wonder what I would talk about ? There is no massive issue to resolve - I am just really really flat and disengaged - I have come to the conclusion this time that "it is me" this is my disposition - there is nothing "wrong" in my life - I just can't feel joy --- or maybe I just can't feel....

[idlevice]

There is a long-term chronic form of depressive illness called dysthymia. If you haven't already covered it, look it up & see if it relates to you. Standard treatment is the same: meds & counselling, but it is the most likely form to be treatment-resistant.

When you were on meds, was it under the guidance of a psychiatrist rather than just GP? You could at least discuss the situation with a psych as they may have a different approach for these different circumstances, but I do understand your reluctance. I only took meds cos I was desperate & you don't sound like that (yet).

Other things to try are exercise, diet, lifestyle, etc but these take a huge effort which may be too difficult if you are already depressed & are not able to get enough out of the positive feedback to outweigh the numbness, anxiety & anhedonia.

[poppledopple]

I did years with GP, upping doses, changing ADs etc - finally went to psych when things got really bad - and was put on a heavy duty combo of drugs - which did get me out if that trough at the time. But after a couple of years I wanted to come off them - took over a year to do this. I will look up the dysmthia / my diet/exercise/lifestyle is not optimum but not hideous either. I think I am trying to pinpoint menopause - I the hope that this will be transient. I don't have the energy or focus to have a proper MLC and make changes - feels like I am wali g thru treacle daily.