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Severe Depression- advice?

(10 Posts)
cheekymonk Mon 29-Aug-16 14:57:08

Hi all. Am posting re my Sister. She is 34, lives alone with both my parents who are separated within 2 miles from her. Mum works full-time, Dad cares for his Mum. I live 60 miles away.
Sister has been very depressed for years. She was in an abusive relationship and ended by leaving partner and having an abortion. She was left with negative equity and still owes on the mortgage deficit after house sale. Ex- partner then raped her 2 years ago. She was working as a nurse but struck off due to conduct. She did have a dog whom she adored but he was run over. On top of all of this she was recently diagnosed with a brain tumour bit it is more of a cyst and not life threatening. Her depression has meant that she is slow to respond and unable to function. She is currently on citalopram. She is currently off sick and had big periods of unemployment in the last few years. My Mum rang me this morning, asking my opinion and wanting an answer, a cure and solution to all of it. Currently they are going to see her every day to make sure she has eaten take her for a drive etc. Mum is frustrated and feels she puts it on at times and laps up the attention. I pointed out that even if this were true, it is not good and that she needs support. I think the way forward is seeing some kind of specialist.Trouble is Sis has had counselling, CBT, done courses Time to talk etc but she often doesn't see them through. She just wants everything fixed. I also feel she should move in with my Mum as she isn't capable of looking after herself but Mum feels that is easy for me to say and is not keen at all. Both kids have ASD and I really have my hands full so am not sure what to do???
Any ideas?

cheekymonk Mon 29-Aug-16 22:05:22


rumred Tue 30-Aug-16 11:02:05

all sounds awful for your sister, no wonder shes depressed. she really needs to see the therapy through i think, but you cant force her. could she stay with you for a while, to get a bit more balanced and some support?

dangermouseisace Tue 30-Aug-16 19:55:08

has she seen anyone from MH team?

Also, does anyone know what effect the brain tumour could have on her mood/behaviour?

AnxiousCarer Tue 30-Aug-16 21:22:52

It sounds really hard for your sister, but I can understand why DM is reluctant for her to live with her as she would then never get a break from caring for her. It sounds like DM is doing a lot for her already. Has she got any MH services involved at he moment?

cheekymonk Wed 31-Aug-16 16:05:54

I live 60 miles away so short break possible but Sister hates sleeping anywhere but her own place. She has big sleep issues. She hasn't seen anyone from MH team recently...
Thanks for your input smile

cheekymonk Wed 31-Aug-16 16:06:48

Neuro specialist said no effect of tumour on her mood/behaviour

cheekymonk Wed 31-Aug-16 16:08:03

Hi anxious carer, no she hasn't. I have suggested social services and the adult care team...

dangermouseisace Wed 31-Aug-16 21:38:27

it might be difficult to get anything from the adult care team unless she literally wouldn't eat unless someone made sure that she would, or couldn't get washed/dressed without prompting, on a daily basis. This wouldn't be because she doesn't need it but because social care budgets are so tight. On the other hand, if she does actually need that support every day then it might be worth a try.

dangermouseisace Wed 31-Aug-16 21:39:13

I can understand you sister not wanting to sleep anywhere except home. I'm the same [embarrassed]

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