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Feeling lost

(9 Posts)
Sofabitch Sat 16-Jul-16 21:10:21

My teenage daughter has taken another overdose tonight. Its her 5th this year. She is already seeing cahms and has been for nearly 2 years but they seem completly useless.

Im finding it so hard. Its worse than having a toddler having to lock everything away all the time.

Tonight i left her for literally an hour. And in the time arranged my mum to call in on her and check.

Im finding it incredibly hard. But also selfishly feel frustrated with her that at nearly 16 i should be able to trust her at home for a short while. I literally just dont know how to help her. I feel like I've tried everything. Im just exhausted.

Part of me just wants to snap and yell and the other half wants to wrap her up and protect her.

The summer holidays are coming up and i have to work. But cant leave her home alone. They don't do childcare for 15 year olds.

Im just literally sat in the hospital trying not to cry because I feel like ive completely faiked as a parent. What is it that her life with me is so terrible she wants to die :-(

I kmow its hard being a teenagee. And she doesnt seem to have many friends. I guess her low mood makes it hard because she never wants to go anywhere.

What can i do?

goingmadinthecountry Sun 17-Jul-16 00:03:11

I don't know what to say but don't want to leave you without an answer. It must be so hard Does your dd have someone to talk to in real life?

AnxietySertraline Sun 17-Jul-16 12:44:32

Sometimes it is not bc someone want to die but it May be that she wants attention - or maybe she has an mental illness - and feel really bad inside (thoughts)...

Sofabitch Wed 20-Jul-16 21:37:30

She has depression and anexity and is already on antidepressants.

She has weekly cahms sessions.

I'm just exhausted. Shes still in hospital as her liver did not cope well with the overdose.

dangermouseisace Wed 20-Jul-16 21:50:18

it must be awful for you. I didn't even begin to imagine the hell I must have put my parents through until I became a parent myself.

If this is dd's 5th this year, resulting in a protracted hospital stay are CAMHS going to offer anything else?

Only thing I can suggest is refusing to have her home until CAMHS come up with some sort of plan, or at least work with you to work out how to keep your daughter safe whilst also getting her to take some responsibility for her own welfare.

Sofabitch Thu 21-Jul-16 20:00:53

Cahms wont get involved until she is medically fit. Which means that she isnt taking any anti depressants as apparently they can only be prescribed by cahms. She has none left because she took them all too.

I think i might try being firm with cahms.... the trouble is the hospital is in a different primary care trust to her camhs... so the duty person i will see isn't even linked to the normal cahms.

dangermouseisace Thu 21-Jul-16 20:34:09

Well, I suppose that they would have to wait until her liver had sorted itself out a bit before starting them again anyway. If CAMHS aren't involved yet who is looking after her on the ward? Usually with things like that they expect either a MH nurse to be drafted in to look after the overdosed person or the person is very compliant with treatment.

I think being firm with CAMHS might be the way forward. Or getting the hospital to be firm with CAMHS even though they are in a different trust. With all of these agencies you really have to shout that things aren't working and you as a parent aren't managing. You physically cannot be looking after a child 24/7 without some form of respite. It is not possible!!!

How are the hospital being with you? My mum told me, when I was older, about how she was talked to by hospitals after ODing as a teenager and I was shocked. I hope that they are treating you better.

KeemaNaanAndCurryOn Thu 21-Jul-16 20:40:45

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I can't imagine how hard it is for you to live with the daily worry about what your DD is doing to herself and what you may come home to.

Do you have any help from social services, as there may be some support they can offer you. CAMHS should be there when she's this unsafe. There's things like counselling and psychotherapy that need to wait for when someone to be stable, but they most definitely should be helping her in other ways to get better.

MH services in this country are appalling, truly appalling. Most MH trusts have carers services, I'd ask to be referred to them too, as you need support.

goingmadinthecountry Mon 25-Jul-16 20:18:34

How's your dd doing?

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