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Stressing about one thing after another constantly

(24 Posts)
Myhairisturninggrey Sat 21-May-16 15:04:05

Just that really. I'm worrying about one thing then the issue is resolved or something else happens and I move onto worrying about that. One thing after another and I know the things I worry about are not serious. It's like I have to have a reason to be anxious so I kind of attach my anxiety to something. I've been like this for more years than I care to remember but I seem to be worse at the moment.
Im sick of feeling like this. Worry is pointless and changes nothing, I know that, yet I still do it.

mumsywoo78 Sat 21-May-16 17:55:27

I'm exactly like this too. Silly little things become huge issues for me and i will fret and obsess over my current issue for weeks until i move onto something else to stress over! I also find decision making impossible. It is totally ruining my life and i find I'm avoiding going places or certain situations because I know they could trigger me obsessing over something. I've been like this since the birth of my youngest dc almost 4 years ago and I feel I'm getting worse. I've had enough of living like this now and have made appointment with GP this week to get help.

Honeymoonmummy Sat 21-May-16 17:59:42

I'm exactly the same too - watching with interest!

Myhairisturninggrey Sat 21-May-16 18:36:13

Thats me, fretting and obsessing all the time lately. And I'm so embarrassed about myself. Dh knows exactly what I am like but no one else really knows how bad I am. I need to either sort myself out or go to the docs and get some medication. I really don't want to but might have no alternative. I've had a short course of telephone guided cbt but it didn't help much as I didn't engage with it. I know what i need to do but can't put it into practice. I've also been on meds in the past.

Hope the gp can sort you out mumsy. Let us know how it goes.

hungryheidi Sat 21-May-16 20:29:39

I have the same problem....have done for so long I can't remember what it's like to be worry free!! I finally went to the docs the other day (after a lot of persuasion from my other half) as it's effecting our life hugely. Plus worrying all the time is tiring and very boring!!!The GP was amazing, and suggested Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (which you can get on the NHS but there will be a bit of a waiting list), and if that doesn't help I can go back and he'll prescribe antidepressants/anti anxiety pills. He also said exercise can be a real help, especially team sports as you get the social factor as well! I do recommend you go and see your GP. I was really nervous as I felt I would be wasting his time, but he didn't make me feel like that at all and took it all very seriously. Good luck!

mumsywoo78 Sun 22-May-16 03:14:14

I also feel embarrassed about the silly things I get myself into a state over and nobody knows how much I am suffering not even dp as I feel he just doesn't understand and will think I'm just being silly. I often offload to my mum and she's the one who has pushed me into going to see GP again. I did have a course of CBT after the birth of my youngest dc almost 4 years ago as I went through a particularly bad time and was having panic attacks. To be honest I didn't find it helped me that much but it doesn't mean that it wouldn't work for other people. I have also been prescribed beta blockers but don't really find them much help either so off to GP again. I drive myself crazy obsessing over one thing after another. I massively regret a recent decision I made to have a bit of work done on my home, work which wasn't necessary really but my anxiety convinced me it was at the time. all work went well with no problems. But I now massively regret it as I feel I've replaced a lovely original feature of my home which could've lasted many more years for something modern and far less superior. Although it now does look lovely i feel I've ruined my home and this is the cause of my current anxiety and why I'm awake at 3am!

Myhairisturninggrey Sun 22-May-16 07:36:26

I know what you mean mumsy. I was awake half the night too. I was worrying about my son who might have failed one of his uni exams as he had to leave it early as he was ill. I'm tying myself in knots over it but he is fine about it and is telling me it's not a problem and he will just resit if needs be. So I've got my teenage son trying to calm me down when I should be the one looking after him! It's the never ending "what Ifs" and catastrophising that get me. I once was anxious about a washing machine I'd bought and I once worried for weeks that I was going to be arrested for going through a red light at a huge complicated roundabout, I have been so ridiculous in the past! It seems daft when I look back but that's how I am.

heidi I did have some telephone guided cbt earlier in the year but didn't find it much help tbh. I self referred for on the nhs for this as well. By the time it came around I was feeling ok and just went through the motions but I was familiar with all the techniques before I started it as I have read loads on the subject in the past. Maybe I didn't work hard enough at it or I need more intense face to face therapy.

I'm reluctant to go to the docs as I don't really want medication as the side effects can make you feel worse to start with. I don't want to feel any worse and I don't feel so desperate as yet but I am heading that way. There is also the sense of shame for being like this as I have no real problems and have a good life, so what have I got to be anxious and depressed about. I've been on meds in the past and came off them as soon as I could. The last lot just made me put on weight and I think it was more of the placebo effect and time passing that made me feel better.

Thanks for this. It's helping me to just get this out as Dh is a bit exasperated with me as I go from one thing to another.

mumsywoo78 Sun 22-May-16 10:09:40

Good morning. myhair I'm sure your son has done well in his exam and like he said he can always resit if he doesn't get the grades he needs this time so its not the end of the world and its not something that can't be put right. Please listen to your son he's not worrying so he must be quite confident in himself. I totally understand you worrying though because I'm exactly the same so it doesn't sound silly to me.i definitely think you should go and see your GP like me and so what if we are prescribed meds if they help. Living with this anxiety about everything can be torture and stops me enjoying life so much I'm willing to try anything now.
God i fret over the silliest things at times if something breaks i feel its the end of the world. I remember my son loosing a drinking bottle and i obsessed about it for days even spending ages online trying to buy an exact replacement we eventually found the bottle and what a relief it was! It was a bloody £2 drinking bottle for gods sake you'd have thought it was made of gold they way i worried about it. That's the sort off silly thing i worry about! Xx

Myhairisturninggrey Sun 22-May-16 10:57:55

Thanks mumsy. Your reply has made me cry. Just having someone who understands is so nice. I seem to need constant reassurance that everything is going to be ok, that things are not as bad as I am making them out to be. So I keep a lot to myself as Dh is understandably getting weary of my worries. He is able to put things into perspective and doesn't let things affect his life the way I do, although he has had anxiety issues himself in the past so knows where I am coming from. But I admit that I am completely over the top.
Yes I need to see the doc and I'm going to make an appointment today - we can book online. But I'm worried about side affects of medication. Not the physical symptoms such as nausea etc, but I am scared that they will increase my anxiety. Not sure if I can take that.

Dragongirl10 Sun 22-May-16 11:13:02

Have you tried Yoga Op?

Much better for you than medication and more effective, a good traditional yoga class with meditation once a week can transform how you feel and really quieten the anxiety.

Also you can do the meditations for 10mins morning and evening in between classes. It can teach you how to let go of the obsessive thoughts and stay calm. Its not hard at all and can be really enjoyable small window of time in the day that helps you get through the rest of it.

Anxiety is so debilitating...good luck

Myhairisturninggrey Sun 22-May-16 20:39:16

Thanks Dragongirl. That's definitely worth thinking about. I will look around for a class locally and see if I can hack it. I tried a class years ago and it was the hardest workout I've ever done - and it was full of older retired ladies who put me to shame! I'd like to give it a go.

I've made an appointment for 1st June to see the doc. I've calmed down a bit now though so I'll see how I feel nearer the day. Been watching self help videos on YouTube which have helped a bit and I'm going to try and find my cbt book and have another look. Got to be more positive and stop imagining the worst case scenario about everything.

mumsywoo78 Sun 22-May-16 21:57:53

Totally get what you mean myhair about needing the constant reassurance that everything is going to be ok that's how I am too. Glad you are feeling better about things this evening. Even if you think you are better nearer the time of your docs appointment please don't cancel your appointment still go as I'm sure you know it'll only be a matter of time before you are stressing over something else and wished you'd have gone. I've cancelled appointments in the past thinking I was getting better only to be in a state over something a few days later.
I don't think the yoga thing would be for me but I've heard hypnotherapy can be good for anxiety but can be quite expensive.

mumsywoo78 Sun 22-May-16 22:13:03

myhair please feel free to private messages me if you ever want to have a chat it's nice to have the support of someone who knows what you are goin through x

Myhairisturninggrey Sun 22-May-16 22:46:07

Thank you mumsy.

mumsywoo78 Tue 24-May-16 18:39:27

How are you feeling now myhair hope you are feeling much better about things. I've not had a very good couple of days but at GP tomorrow so hopefully will get some help. X

Myhairisturninggrey Tue 24-May-16 20:25:21

Hope you get something sorted out tomorrow mumsy. Let us know how it goes.

I'm not brilliant tbh. I just feel so on edge all the time and I'm fighting the urge to have a glass of wine so I can relax. I won't though as I know that's not the best thing to do. I wish I could get rid of the horrible nervous feeling in my chest and throat. Distraction is needed I think.

Myhairisturninggrey Wed 25-May-16 20:48:58

How did you get on Mumsy? Hope it went well at the docs.

mumsywoo78 Thu 26-May-16 00:28:16

Hi there doc has prescribed me sertraline 50mg today not taken any yet though I'm a bit worried about the side affects. Can't go on living with this anxiety though so gonna have to give them a go. thank you for asking myhair . How have you been today is there anything in particular bothering you today or are you still worrying about your sons exam result. I actually find coming on mumsnet a good distraction and have you tried those adult colouring books.

mumsywoo78 Thu 26-May-16 07:08:54

Woke up feeling awful today why is anxiety always so bad first thing in the morning going to have to give the meds a go today. Hope everyone else has a much better day xx

Middleoftheroad Thu 26-May-16 07:28:32

Hope you don't mind me joining? Glad you got the meds Mumsy and I hope they make your day better though doesnt sound like the best start, sorry.😯
I've had anxiety since my kids were born 10 years ago and what everybody says really resonates. Dont sleep, worry constantly over something. Little things too. Doesnt help that I have to make decisions at work- and at home or work i question every decision. Never used to be like this. My nan was the same and i think i have inherited that. She woke at 5 every day as i now do even though she was on sleeping pills for years. I too worry about going to gp wasting their time but like you all i cant go on exhausted. I go to work like a zombie and worry bout having a crash with kids as so tired. There you go! But this reassures me that I am not alone in this. Thanks for starting!

mumsywoo78 Thu 26-May-16 13:49:29

Welcome middle so sorry to hear that you've been suffering for 10 years. Mine has been almost 4 years since the birth of my ds. I've noticed with a lot of us it seems to start after childbirth I often wonder if there is a hormonal link to it and I seem to noticed I get slightly worse at time of the month has anyone else noticed that pattern too? I'm currently tearing myself to bits because I now realize I made the wrong decision over something. I so wish I could turn the clock back. Anyway started meds today hopefully will help soon. Have u tried any meds middle. x

Myhairisturninggrey Thu 26-May-16 19:00:17

I'm not too bad today mumsy. Not worrying so much about ds and the exam mess. Its not really a mess tbh, just in my head!
I'll be interested to hear how you get on with the sertraline and if you get any start up side effects. My mum is on this and she gets on fine. She had a bit of a funny turn after taking the first one but doc told her to take it in the middle of a meal and she was fine after that.
Hello middle. Its good to have your company.
I must say it makes the world of difference to be able to come on here and get support and share worries with people who are going through the same. And not feel like an idiot.
Mumsy I'm sure the worries you have currently will fade over time. Its just when you get something into your head and get into that way of thinking, it spirals out of control. I'm the same. If you can step back and look at it differently, is it really so bad? The answer is probably no, but I understand what you are going through.

mumsywoo78 Thu 26-May-16 22:38:21

Thank you myhair I know I've just got to think of the positives of things. And I keep telling myself it wont matter so much in time and I'll soon be stressing over something else instead! Took my first tablet this afternoon felt a little bit drowsy earlier on but fine now. I'll keep you informed on how I'm finding them. So glad your feeling better about things now smile. do you think you'll stick to your docs appointment? X

Myhairisturninggrey Thu 26-May-16 22:56:53

I'll see how things go over the weekend before I decide about docs.
Glad you are OK and hopefully will be on the up now you have started the meds.

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