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Gaslighting.. But genuine?

(3 Posts)
Lanark2 Wed 23-Mar-16 23:49:00

I am asking this question, because I am trying to make sense of a work situation.

A person at work keeps suggesting I am making mistakes, however it is definitely her. She has form for making up "errors' and/or claiming that a mistake made by her is in fact someone else's mistake, do there is a will behind it, however I sometimes wonder whether she is actually having gaps where she makes a mistake, then forgets she did it, so that when she next sees it, its a surprise, as she also does this when she says 'you have done a lot today' , I say ' yes it's been a good day' then she says 'oh well, don't worry, we all have bad days..are you OK?'

It could be intentional, but sometimes she seems confused sort of amongst herself iyswim.

She often jokes about being 'mad' and 'out to lunch'.

I mostly think that as I resist the tactics, and they don't work, they sort of reflect back onto her, but sometimes I think she just confused herself because she can't remember how she wanted reality to look (she can be openly manipulative).

She will also do something, then say to herself 'I didn't do that, why is that there'..but not in a joking way..


pippistrelle Thu 24-Mar-16 10:05:04

I think I would have a chat with your own line manager just outlining your concerns, and then leave it at that. Do you share a manager, or does she have a different one?

sadie9 Thu 24-Mar-16 11:47:32

Was your colleague always like this? She may have a short term memory problem rather than actually trying to undermine anyone. It must be very frustrating for you. As the other poster says if there is a supervisor you can just mention the things you have noticed about her behaviour, rather than 'she is accusing me of all sorts' sort of way.
By doing that also you will be highlighting the issue in an objective way, so should anything arise in the future you have said it.

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