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Dealing with husband's long term depression

(5 Posts)
Kilmeny Sun 17-Jan-16 17:32:46

I am struggling with my husband and his depression at the moment. He has dysthymic disorder, meaning he is mainly very low and doesn't see much joy in life. He was taking Prozac until last October and had to come off for health reasons and has plummeted again since then after seeming slightly better.

We have two children with additional needs and he is a great dad and works full time
In a stressful job so he has a lot to cope with. He's tried various therapies and counselling but gave up on them saying it wasn't working.

I can see how much he is suffering and I don't know what to do to help any more. The children take up so much time with appointments and assessments and I am utterly exhausted and wishing he would just talk to me and be affectionate.

I love him very much and I know he feels the same but he has admitted that coping with work and the kids takes all his energy and there's nothing left for me. Which sounds selfish of me to complain as I want him to get help for him.

Has anyone any experience of living with a long term depressed partner and has anything helped? It's been 15 years of this up and down and there are bright spots but they are getting fewer. Thank you for reading.

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 17-Jan-16 18:00:40

Having lived with a depressed DH for many years, you have my sympathy. If he has had to stop Prozac, is there anything else he could take?

Kilmeny Sun 17-Jan-16 18:50:37

He has tried Effexor and buspar in the past and stopped taking them once he felt better. He's very much of the opinion that there's nothing he can take now that will change how he feels and I can't get him to the doctor. I may try to get an appt to go on my own and ask their advice.

Clare1971 Mon 18-Jan-16 11:15:55

My DH has bouts of depression but thankfully medication seems to help. Thinking he will always feel low and accepting it as the norm is a classic symptom of depression, I have to remind my DH that he's said it before but that it does change. Must be harder to believe if you're under for as long as your DH though. If Effexor or buspar (don't know them) worked in the past are they worth another go? Are you getting any time out for yourself to recharge your batteries? I used to laugh at that suggestion because it felt like a bit of a sticking plaster but I've realised now that it is vital and I do cope better if I have even a short time away from it all.

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 19-Jan-16 16:24:40

I've found this on the Mind website. Don't know if it's of any use.

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