NC for this, but long time lurker and some time poster.
Recently been struggling with work relationships, and have always had difficulty maintaining friendships. Basically I'm not very nice. Did a 360 feedback at work to try to establish where my 'development areas' are with the support of my boss and HR. The report reads like I am psychotic. The consultant reviewing it with me said she'd never seen a report like it before and was at a bit of a loss to explain it.
I googled narcissism this evening because I see the term used so often on MN and don't really understand it, except that it's not a compliment. Reading further on real self and false self I recognise so much of myself and what is happening with my work and personal relationships. I read it to dp and he admitted, cautiously, that he can recognise me in a lot of it.
I had a very controlling mother who never played with me as a dc, and I also suffered sexual abuse as a dc. When she was confronted with it (undeniably, caught in the act) she denied it and refused to speak of it. I raised it with her once as an adult and she again denied all knowledge.
Bi-polar runs in the family and I have been terrified I have this, or shades of it. For two decades I've known I don't interact with other people the way other people interact with each other and i dont form lasting friendships. I have had counselling In the past but never felt it got to the core of why I am just simply unlikeable. I Have been variously told that I am controlling, bossy, selfish, aggressive and inconsistent. Nice huh?
I don't want to be me. Has anyone got any experience of dealing with or resolving NPD? Please don't just tell me I'm a bitch. I already know that.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.
Mental health
I think I may be a narcissistic, inwardly hating myself. What do I do now?
7 replies
Falseself · 13/01/2016 01:00
OP posts:
SeoulSista ·
14/01/2016 06:17
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.