I just feel so low about myself

[AJFsmummy]

Long story short, for several years now I have suffered depression, anxiety and eating disorders. I have been slowly recovering with small doses of beta blockers but no anti- dep's. I currently run a small business and the stress from that is immense.

I went to my friends (we will call her Amy) for drinks on Friday, I hadn't seen her in a while and I kind of dreaded seeing her as she doesn't mince her words, she has gained an old friend of mine (we will call her jade) who I can no longer stand dues to her bitchiness, all Jade does is bitch about me and.... it all, of course, gets back to me via Amy, but it still makes me feel naff.

Amy then went to me "don't be upset but I had my friend Charlie round with her little boys and she said how your very hated and not well liked by people".

Oh my F**king god I don't need this, ok not everyone is going to like everyone but to hear hated etc it made me feel physically and mentally drained, I keep myself away from gossip etc and my life is very quiet - the old social networking. What is wrong with people? I have people I'm not keen on, but I don't hate?? what on earth have I done make people hate so much????? I'm not a saint at all and I have been a party girl like 10years ago.

I feel like everything I have tried to build up like my self-esteem has just come crashing down.

[Marchate]

First, some friends are too blunt and should learn the social graces.

Hatred is a very intense emotion and takes a lot of effort. It is highly unlikely that people hate you. What's in it for them? Nothing. So you can discount that as totally untrue.
Are you sure you need Amy's 'friendship'? It doesn't sound like she's good for you at the moment

[ProfessorPreciseaBug]

Someone who calls themselves a friend will repeat gossip and hurt you
A friend will bail you out of gaol...







A real friend will be in gaol with you saying..."that was fun... we can do it again when we get out"

Sorry.... the last one was a joke. I really don't know how to respond to your OP. I feel lost for words so I hope a small joke may help you smile for a while.