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Terrified today

(13 Posts)
CuppaBiccieBliss Wed 07-Oct-15 13:40:20

I am having a really bad day and can't see a way to get through it sad
I've been having panic attacks all day, awful flashbacks and am genuinely frightened. I have had to come upstairs to lie in bed as I don't want dd2 seeing me like this. I have taken some diazepam bur it hasn't helped sad
What can I do? These days are getting more frequent recently and I just don't have the energy to deal with them anymore

TheoriginalLEM Wed 07-Oct-15 13:55:33

oh, you poor thing sad

One thing i can offer is to think to yourself its "only anxiety"

That sounds really patronising but think about it - what is happening to you at that moment in time (even with the flashbacks) is anxiety. Sometimes when i get anxious i feel like im going to implode. But i never do. The reason for this is what is physically happening. The triggering thoughts are causing you to become anxious, as a response to this your body is going into fight or flight. Lots of adrenalin, cortisone and other hormones released and it increases the feeling of anxiety, but after a while the hormones reach such a level that they start to switch themselves off. Every time, it happens that way - the panic subsides.

So its a way of taking control, its "only anxiety" it will pass, i am safe.

Of course it isn't "only anxiety" in terms of the effects it is having on you.

Are you getting help? You say you have diazepam, are you on anti-anxiety meds other than this? Diazepam is only a short term fix and to be honest, i didn't find it helped very much at the low dose i suspect you take.

You mention flashbacks - are you getting help dealing with this? Do you want to discuss it here? I understand you might not want to.

I have discovered running, my anxiety is terrible at the moment, i don't often have panic attacks, its more like there is one constantly brewing. Running really really helps - despite me making hmm faces at the dr when they suggested it, i cannot believe how much it helps. Doesn't have to be running but another type of exercise - even walking will help with hormones and also distraction.

Hang on in there - remember its "only anxiety"

MyFavouriteClintonisGeorge Wed 07-Oct-15 13:59:41

Is there a friend or relative who can help talk you down over the phone? The key is not to talk about the panic attacks but about any old topic-your favourite soap, this season I will mostly be wearing sackcloth and ashes, cricket, actors I fancy the most, anything you like. It is an effective way of lessening the symptoms and shortening the attack.

MistressChalk Wed 07-Oct-15 14:09:01

LEMs post is good advice, I use that reasoning when any of my anxiety etc. Flares up. I calmly tell myself all the 'science' behind what is happening to me and break it down into chemical reactions to make it just a natural, biological and psychological reaction which isn't scary. It's the associated emotions and thoughts that make it scary but once you realise that they too are just bits of your brain randomly flaring up and getting muddled it seems more controllable.

I'm no good at putting that process into words sorry but it is a really helpful technique for me and I managed to get to the point where I can logic myself out of an anxiety attack. Although I still have to take it easy and stay in a safe place until I'm feeling stronger.

Have you tried CBT? It worked wonders for me in learning the steps to shut down anxiety. Also, perhaps when you are feeling a bit clearer it might be worth really researching anxiety, strangely reassuring to see it written down and think 'ah yes that's me!' Makes it feel more normal and a lot less scary.

Maybe stick on some really light, funny crap TV like cartoons and try and let your mind numb out to it? Also drink some water slowly over an hour or so as it will help you focus on something.

CuppaBiccieBliss Wed 07-Oct-15 14:09:44

Thankyou both for the replies.
It's so exhausting feeling like this. I know what you mean about it being only anxiety. That's how I normally get through it but today I just can't sad
I take citalopram and quetiapine along with diazepam. I'm on the waiting list for counselling and emdr but I have been for the best part of a year! We can't afford to go private unfortunately.
The flashbacks today are so real I'm struggling to work out what's real and what's not confused
I have put a dvd on to try and distract myself.

TheoriginalLEM Wed 07-Oct-15 14:17:47

If you are taking quetiapine then really you should be right at the front of the list for counselling. You might need to make a bit of a nuisance of yourself as i had to when i was quite unwell but it did result in me (finally) getting to see a decent therapist. Don't be fobbed off with trainee counsellors. It sounds to me like you have a lot to deal with and you do not want a box ticking exercise.

Some days nothing works, in fact ive only just got out of bed (although was feeling depressed rather than anxious) it has helped.

DVD is good. I also find mindless computor games help, i do escape the room games as they take a bit more brain power than the gem swapping games that allow my mind to wander.

Keep going - you can do this!

TheoriginalLEM Wed 07-Oct-15 14:20:10

Another thought - ask your GP about escitalopram. Citalopram stopped working for me and my GP swapped me to escitalopram because i didnt want to go on max dose cit as it zombifies me. They don't prescribe this first line because its more expensive but it is more effective for patience with anxiety that citalopram and is effectively the same drug just the chemistry works that you don't have to take so much of it to get an effect.

CuppaBiccieBliss Wed 07-Oct-15 14:55:04

Thanks again flowers
I will try to get a gp appointment and ask about that. It seems too much to deal with today. It's as if I'm back there again, it feels so real

TheoriginalLEM Wed 07-Oct-15 15:34:17

You are here, it is now and you are safe. That can't hurt you anymore. Remember that.

CuppaBiccieBliss Wed 07-Oct-15 19:20:43

Thankyou flowers
Honestly reading that helped smile I wish someone could take it all away, if only for a day!
I've managed to come downstairs, didn't have a choice really, dd1 wants to watch bake off smile

TheoriginalLEM Wed 07-Oct-15 19:48:57

am sitting waiting for bake off to start. smile

CuppaBiccieBliss Wed 07-Oct-15 19:53:51

Ah another bake off fan smile dd1 loves it, thankfully dp is a great cook and they bake together, I, on the other hand, can burn beans blush

MistressChalk Wed 07-Oct-15 23:29:13

Ah fellow bake offians! Anyone else shed a tear? I was going to say it's perfect chill out TV only it got very tense!

How are you feeling now OP?

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