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Anybody with BPD?

(5 Posts)
mysticlogistic Thu 03-Sep-15 09:32:28

Im sorry if this isn't appropriate, we have a hell of a lot going on at the moment and I'm just looking to ask if any of you that have BPD might be able to give me some advice as to how to best support somebody with it.

Its been a long journey but i think thats what DH has, its in the process of being diagnosed and there are plenty of people involved, I'm not getting too hung up on it incase its something else but everyone seems fairly certain. He was caught twice yesterday having hung himself and has been put in a secure unit in the early hours of this morning so hopefully now they will diagnose.

He tells us he's been trying to do it since he was about 15 but I've only been aware of it for about the last year, but its been a year of none stop attempts to take his life.

I just don't know where to go from here. I want to support him but i really want to do it in the best way for him and don't want to make things any more difficult for him. If any of you could give me any advice on how best to deal with it or what definitely not to do it would really help.


UnbelievableBollocks Thu 03-Sep-15 12:53:59

Is he being assessed for Borderline PD or Bipolar Disorder? Sometimes the two can get mixed up with the acronyms.

That aside, you must feel so powerless and worried that he's unwell enough to be admitted to hospital, though he's in the best place at the moment. professional help is what's needed to get him stabilised and keep him safe.

When someone is admitted, the psych etc will work with the patients family to discuss treatment and how their condition is managed. You can also ask for a carers assessment, where someone involved in his care will talk things through with you. He'll be getting support from staff, but it's recognised that you'll need help too.

It's probably a bit soon to take it it, but most areas have carers forums or groups to support the family of someone who is ill. There's also lots of advice on the Mind website that you may find useful.

One of the things that often upsets family is where someone won't let them visit. If this happens, try not to take it too hard. People act out of character when they're ill and it's no reflection on you.

Here if you need to talk.

mysticlogistic Thu 03-Sep-15 20:20:07

Thank you for the lovely response unbelievable. He really has been in a terrible way and its just so worrying I sometimes can't see a peaceful end to it if you know what i mean. They think he has Borderline Personality Disorder, and without outing us, Whats worrying me most is that he has been told he can't come home for at least 6 months no matter what happens by social services because of how he got, but he can't go back to his mum and dads because it was so violent there he's been NC with them for a while and theres no way he would get support there of any kind. So i just don't know whats going to happen to him or where he will go or how i can support him.

UnbelievableBollocks Thu 03-Sep-15 22:22:41

He may well be in hospital for a lot of that time, but at the moment it's too new to know. Services differ so vastly across the country, but local to my area there's anything from supported short-term accommodation for people who are well enough to leave acute care, but still need help integrating back into life and family. I think there's many schemes like that. Some areas even have therapeutic communities for people with personality disorders, but they're less common. As his first contact, you will at the very least be kept informed of what options are available.

At the moment he's acutely unwell, so I think it will be a case of working with MH services to make sure that he's being cared for and you're supported too.

Long term admissions are hard on the families. You have my sympathy. be kind to yourself.

mysticlogistic Thu 03-Sep-15 22:35:01

Thank you unbelievable. He was already in a sort of supported accommodation place. He got particularly nasty and had to move out on his own to fulfil social services criteria so he was staying in a one bedroom flat in a supported accommodation place but overtime he went home to there he spiralled and got so scared, that now I'm scared of him going back where yes there are people on site but nobody to watch him 24-7 you know?

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