Anxiety about DD

[mommathatwearspink]

I will start by saying that I have suffered from anxiety in many forms for a long time (although I haven't seen my GP about it). It comes and goes dependant on what I have going on in my life. It has been ok recently until DD lost consciousness about 2 months ago. At the time we thought she was choking but she wasn't and she came round, was fine and primary care said it was due to her being under the weather. It happened again a couple of weeks ago when DD had chicken pox... my DP was out at the time and I ran out of the house onto the street screaming help me. I felt helpless. She came round and was fine but NHS asked us to go to A&E for her to be checked out. They found no issues and said she was fainting and it was either due to her high temperature or breath holding. Ever since then I keep getting flashbacks of that moment and can't stop thinking about the worst... she was so floppy. I can't give her medicine anymore because she gets so upset and if she cries, I instantly panic incase she loses consciousness again. This evening she was stirring in her cot so I picked her up and sat up in bed with her lying on my chest. I put my hand on her back and couldn't feel it rising... instantly I ran downstairs screaming to DP that she wasn't breathing who took her off me and said he could feel her breath and she was just in a deep sleep. I'm shaking and my hearts racing, I just want to sit by her cot all night. I constantly worry about her choking or hurting herself or that she'll just stop breathing due to something underlying. I don't feel myself, just a nervous wreck around her