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I'm feeling very lost right now(6 Posts)
Your children, partner and close relative would notice if you disappeared.
Planning a wedding is very stressful, maybe it was not quite the right time for you.
It's not being selfish, it's how you feel and you've sought help, though waiting for an appointment is a pain.
Looking after two children under five is very challenging to put it mildly.
You have a lot to deal with and it's hard so be gentle on yourself.
You should better consult a GP for your kids so that you all as a family can get sleep .Sleep deprivation is a very harmful thing and I have been there .
First try to solve this .Having proper sleep not only will provide you will mood elevation but also help you think straight which you are not able to do in this situation .
Please be gentle on yourself .Dealing with 2 kids is not easy .
Try to find out what you want in life .Are your money problems sorted ?
The truth is pyschiatrist might treat you but in long term you are your best friend .It has to come from within ,your happiness, your goals .
Wishing you best of luck .
Take things just one day at a time. Having kids that age is Not easy with no support. Can you get friends and family to take your 4 yr old sometimes so you can nap when the 5 month old does? You could try your local Home Start charity too. They can provide a volunteer to help you at this difficult time.
Is the kids father not helping with the children?? I'm not liking the way he abandoned you and the children because you had some mental health problems. It wouldn't not make a relationship easy but I don't think you should ale blame for breaking the relationship and definitely not for making him say/do things he rather not!
I'm sorry your relative has cancer. Pray for the best but remember you have no control over this illness. You can only support them and love them. Can I ask who it is? I don't mean that you should not care or feel sad but I just mean you cannot change the illness. You only have control over how you treat the person and how you process things mentally. You're allowed to feel sad and rubbish as things sound tough.
You're allowed to find things difficult, they sound very very difficult!
Well done on coping with your little ones. They love you specifically so you can't go anywhere just yet. You're irreplaceable to them. Can you do some simple activities with the kids to keep you distracted and have moments of happiness? Walks in the park? Trips to the farm? Some quality time.
Hope that's helped a little. If nothing else I hope you know that there are people rooting for you!
It sounds like you have a lot going on in your life at the moment but you are taking positive steps to help yourself. Going to the doctor is a massive step, well done for taking it!
It's hard to stay positive especially when things look bleak but try to remind yourself that often things happen which you cannot influence - illness, people saying cruel things to you and so on - but what you can influence is how you react to these things. Remind yourself they are not your fault, perhaps focus on positive, practical things you can do to help either your relative or to bolster your own confidence so you can see cruel jibes as just someone lashing out rather than true acts.
Things sound very tough right now but you also sound like you have some of the tools to get through this difficult period. It wont always be like this, one day you will wake up and the worst will be behind you.
Cling on to the fact you have two gorgeous kids who adore you. Talk to someone in real life who can help you - perhaps get your partner to step up, he has moved out of the house but he hasn't moved out of your or the kids' lives, he needs more than ever to take his share and to reassure the children, that shouldn't be completely up to you. Take all the help you can off the doctor, be totally open when you meet with them and hopefully you will get the help you need.
Hope this helps a little
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