Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, see our mental health web guide which can point you to expert advice.

fed up

(1 Post)
Frogqueen13 Tue 07-Jul-15 22:36:06

I don't really know why I am writing this, I have no one really to talk to at the minute but I just cant stop crying.
I should be happy I have two beautiful polite loving children, a husband who loves me and a job promotion but all I want to do is run away. I am a nurse and I a patient I was caring for died last week quite unexpectedly I cared for her like she was my own relative for a few short hours but when I left she died and I got a bollocking as she wasn't in the correct outfit. It didn't matter that I have given her pain relief or made her a cup of tea, or that I had helped her to the toilet, just what she was wearing. this in itself I could cope with.
The other problem is were skint, my husband works 150 miles away earning very little- he has to stick at it though for another couple of years as the benefits will make us very comfortable. to make up for this I am working all the hours god gives (70 this week) to ensure everything is paid for. if i dont earn we have nothing so going off sick isnt an option if i lose the overtime we will drown. I am also looking after our two girls single handed each week whilst trying to pay for two homes, I owe a catalog company £300 and they are hounding me for it and I just cant face talking to them.
today I went on a specialist training course- only to receive multiple phone calls from work regarding a problem with my shifts- asking for help over the holidays as there is no school to be told everyone is in the same position so deal with it.
I have come home without my children- my grandma who is in her eighties ahs them as I am in work at 7am tomorrow, and cried and I cant seem to stop. I have an appointment with the gp and mental health nurse on Friday to see if they can help as I suffer with anxiety following an assault. but I don't really no what I can do to fix this, I don't no how they can help.

I'm so sorry I don't know what I want from this but it is cathartic just writing it down.

tia

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now