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Aupair to help depressed mum

(4 Posts)
lovelyscenery Tue 10-Feb-15 19:10:17

We have never had an au pair before, and I hate having to ask for help. But I am in the midst of a horrible depression and it has been advised that a helping hand within the house would be beneficial, and an au pair would be the answer. Has anyone tried this ? I am scared it would be like having another child in the house or would feel ashamed that I would need to be cared for alongside the children by whoever comes and helps ...

SavoyCabbage Tue 10-Feb-15 23:37:23

I think it would help if it was the right person. There will be people out there who would be great at this. You won't be wanting an 18 year old who has never lived away from home before.

What about a 'mother's help' instead. Who could help you out during the day but goes home at night. I onve worked for an agency where I went to people for a day or longer and helped them out with whatever they had going on. Sometimes looking after the dc, other times it was sorting out a bedroom. Once I took newborn twins out in the pram for a couple of hours so the mother could have a rest, that sort of thing.

How old are your dc and what sort of things are you looking for help with?

Unexpected Wed 11-Feb-15 00:10:06

I agree a mother's help or perhaps a nanny/housekeeper would be better for you. Au pairs can be fantastic but they can also be a lot of work and the last thing you want is to have to deal with that on top of how you are feeling now. Also consider how you would feel about having another adult living with you? Unless you have a huge house, it can be quite intrusive.

lovelyscenery Wed 11-Feb-15 00:53:59

Interesting ideas. I think the reason am au pair was suggested is that my partner works long hours so evenings are very lonely and I never ever go out as feel trapped. I feel most vunerable at these times (ie now, at 1 in the morning). Having someone here may help?

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