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Bring Maternity Leave Start Date Forward Due to OCD?

(10 Posts)
WorryWurta Sat 13-Dec-14 16:24:22

I would appreciate any advice on this topic. I've developed OCD like symptoms since becoming pregnant (never a problem before). I've started counselling and am waiting for the mental health team to send someone out to work with me in my home (push me to do things that scare me) but since this started two months ago things have been worse and worse. Some I can't make food or drinks for myself so if I'm home and DH is at work I don't eat or drink unless he leaves me something. He makes me a packed lunch for work. I have a fear of a few specific illnesses (toxoplasmosis and listeria from eating, HIV and hepatitis C from basically any contact with the outside world). I feel like there are always tiny particles of cat poo or infected blood in my house, in my handbag, car etc.

Anyway I've posted before about that and I don't want to duplicate. My question is whether I should bring my maternity leave start date forward. I'm due 13th March and ATM my plan is AL from the start of March and then maternity leave from 12th (unless the baby turns up early). However, I'm worried now that finishing so close to my due date is a problem as it doesn't leave me a lot of time to deal with being in the house by myself. It would be career suicide to do that, as I am solely responsible for a project at work, I only started this job in the summer, and my replacement isn't being advertised for until January. If the project folds early because nobody is working on it the funding will be pulled and I will be made redundant. At the same time my symptoms are getting so severe that I almost think 'f**k it' to the job.

Pico2 Sat 13-Dec-14 16:35:32

Have you considered being signed off instead?

WorryWurta Sat 13-Dec-14 16:48:45

I have thought about it but I'm worried that will look worse on my work record?

Pico2 Sat 13-Dec-14 22:46:59

It is illegal to discriminate for pregnancy related absences. I don't know if that means that a reference to a new employer omits them or just records them separately. I was signed off from 29 weeks in my last pregnancy and got a new job after maternity leave without a problem.

dontrunwithscissors Sun 14-Dec-14 07:53:56

I would say that going on ML early looks far worse than being signed off. Doing the former makes it look like you're 'just' wanting a rest, whereas getting signed off shows it's something unexpected and unavoidable.

PrimalLass Sun 14-Dec-14 07:57:14

If you are struggling to be in the house is it not better to keep going to work for as long as possible?

YonicSleighdriver Sun 14-Dec-14 08:02:26

Could you discuss with the MH team whether the symptoms are likely to lessen after birth? If so, then keeping more of the leave for after the birth may work better.

Can your DH take extra holiday as well as his paternity leave or work from
Home, if you need it?

BikeRunSki Sun 14-Dec-14 08:04:45

Neither sick leave or maternity leave are "bad"!!!!

WorryWurta Sun 14-Dec-14 11:07:08

It would make more sense to stay at work if it weren't for the baby coming, but then the first time home alone will be with an infant, I would rather work on learning to cook/clean/function at home again in time for the birth.

YonicSleighdriver Sun 14-Dec-14 11:19:43

Worry, could you take a week's leave in January and see how you get on?

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