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please help me to understand anxiety and depression

(6 Posts)
PrincessScrumpy Mon 31-Mar-14 23:51:05

I know this post will make me seem ignorant and I guess I am. I have no experience of this but now a friend is really finding life hard and I just don't get it. On the outside she has a wonderful husband, lovely children - although I think one bug issue for her is not liking them growing up (8 & 11yo), no financial issues, currently studying but doesn't need to work but planned to after degree finishes... so from the outside her life is so much easier than many others yet she is struggling with anxiety and depression. I don't know how I can help, I want to help but don't know what. Part of it is I just don't understand - I know that sounds horrible but when you've not suffered it or been close to someone who has it's really hard to get it. I'm hoping someone on here can help me to understand.

Perfectlypurple Tue 01-Apr-14 00:00:15

Anxiety and depression can hit anyone. Just because they should be happy doesn't mean they are.

Anxiety - no logic to it. I have it. I worry excessively about something happening to my husband and other family members. Ridiculous things. Logically I know these things are unlikely to happen but I can't stop the 'what ifs'. The worst thing you can do is dismiss it. It will make the person feel even more stupid than they already do.

Depression - have also had this. I still have very low moments. When that happens the thought of socialising just overwhems me. Luckily I have friends who understand and just leave me to it with the odd supportive message. It doesn't happen often but I know I can rely on my friends to let me work things through in my own time. A good friend is the same and I do the same for her.

PrincessScrumpy Tue 01-Apr-14 00:17:35

Thank you - I worried I should be rallying round more but staying back but letting her know I'm there when she's ready would of course be something I can do, just don't want her to think I don't care.

Perfectlypurple Tue 01-Apr-14 06:08:20

It's nice that you care enough to ask. Lotsof people tend to do the 'pull your socks up thing'. Maybe just tell her you know it's hard for her at the moment and you won't keep bother her but you are there if she needs it.

126sticks Tue 01-Apr-14 12:25:02

Nobody has much idea what goes on inside a person's head.
And they can be a lot better on some days than others.
And it can disappear and only come back at times.
It is silent and invisible.
But it is very real. And doesnt seem to make much difference who a person is. Winston Churchill used to get depression.
So status and finances dont make a difference.

126sticks Tue 01-Apr-14 12:26:29

I dont think that having too much time on a person's hands helps. To much time to sit down, too much time to think.
But that doesnt apply to everyone either.

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